


Friend Or Foe

by Fuse



Series: Caught In The Grey [1]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, Harry Potter: Hogwarts Mystery (Video Game)
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Author Is Sleep Deprived, Childhood Trauma, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Emotionally Repressed, Enemies to Friends, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, F/F, First Crush, First Kiss, Fluff, Gen, Genderfluid Rowan Khanna, Grief/Mourning, Gryffindor vs. Slytherin Rivalry, I'm Bad At Summaries, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Internalized Homophobia, LGBTQ Character, LGBTQ Character of Color, Merula Synde Redemption, Merula needs therapy, Morally Ambiguous Character, Not Canon Compliant, Slow Burn, Slytherin Pride, So does player character, Some Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-25
Updated: 2020-11-20
Packaged: 2021-03-06 14:20:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 54
Words: 45,258
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26100277
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fuse/pseuds/Fuse
Summary: (Being Edited/Beta'd currently)Starting third year, Cyra Moores finds herself balancing more personal secrets along with her own faults as well as the struggles of being 13 and those first crushes.Add to it the opening of the vault of fear (which makes her face painful truths about both her family and herself.) And her desire to strike her own path will turn Hogwarts into more of a war ground than a safe heaven.
Relationships: Player Character/Merula Snyde
Series: Caught In The Grey [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1957351
Comments: 3
Kudos: 109





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> This came up because someone made a joke on Tumblr and it reminded me of something...  
> And the idea wouldn't go away do I wrote it.
> 
> Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Ever since the first year, things didn't go as planned for Cyra Moores. First, there were the rumors then there was Merula Snyde, who had a few redeeming qualities but not enough for Cyra not to want to push her into the lake sometimes.

She just really hoped this year would be better—and that Merula had grown up at least somewhat during their summer break, lest she actually did push her into the lake.

Yet now on the train, she found herself wondering not only about her brother or the ice vault from last year but also about her summer. Her summer had—for the lack of a better term—tense. The pressure from her parents had seemed to increase and they all out seemed to avoid her most days.

Was it because of her involvement with the vaults?

Sighing she left Rowan (who had fallen asleep) in the cabin and made her way toward the toilets, only to nearly get hit with the door as a familiar figure with wild hair exited the room.

"Oh, so you did decide to come back, Moores. Haven't they kicked you out yet?"

Cyra inhaled as she shoved past the other girl, trying to ignore that jab.

"Bugger off, Merula." 

She muttered as she went to change, only to hear the other girl scoff.

"Oh, look at me. I'm Cyra Moores and I'm so scary because I finally removed the stick out of my ass and learned to curse!"

_Just ignore the self-centered brat and maybe she will get bored and leave._

She thought, trying to block out the rest of the other girl's tangent.

Even if at that moment she wanted to punch the stupid smirk off of Merula's dumb face. 

"You seem agitated."

Rowan muttered sleepily when Cyra returned, earning a huff as Cyra slid the door shut.

"I ran into the residential demonic hedgehog of our age group." She retorted sliding back into her seat.

"What did she do this time?"

Cyra sighed as she reached into her cat's carrier and took out the small black kitten.

"What doesn't she do? She's Merula Snyde, it's what she does! She runs her mouth, pushes people around, and acts as if she didn't smack herself in the face with her broom multiple times in our first year." 

The last part caused Rowan to burst into laughter.

"Remember when she fell backward off the thing after bragging so much about how she already knew how to fly?"

"Yeah, remember her face? You would have thought someone had pushed her off the thing!" Cyra retorted, doing a dramatic expression that caused even more laughter.

They were still laughing when the door slid open and Ben cooper walked in, what looked like marsh goo across the back of his uniform shirt.

It had been a long summer and something told Cyra it was going to be an even longer school year.


	2. Truth From vipers?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cyra gets some bad news but can it be trusted?

"Wow Moores, over it already? Maybe you really are mad." 

Cyra tried to ignore the arrogant voice on the other side of the Slytherin common room that night. 

"Remind me again why I have never cast a bat bogey hex on that girl yet?" She commented to her friends.

"Because you're not a jerkass like she is?"

One-seventh year commented as he walked passed, earning a laugh from the small group.

"So how was your summer? There is a rumor that you and Rowan are a thing. Is that true?"

One second-year asked, earning a groan from Cyra.

_ This is what I get for opening my big mouth during that truth or dare game last year. _ She thought, sighing as she answered:

"Just because I don't see gender as an issue doesn't  _ mean  _ I am going to fall in love with  **_everyone._ ** Rowan is my best friend." 

With that she turned her attention back toward her cards, trying—and failing—to block out how ridiculously nice everyone was being, minus Merula and her posse of followers although she did seem to be slightly less in her face today.

Just what the hell was going on? Even Rowan had seemed off. This was not normal behavior for any of them. One part of her wanted to ask though the other figured that they would just lie to her about whatever it was.

She knew she  _ could  _ ask Merula  _ but  _ just how much truth would come out of that?

Too bad she didn't get the chance to decide if she should ask or not since the following morning, on her way to breakfast when she overheard something from the dorm room across the hall.

"I mean, it could be denial but she has been acting as if nothing has happened. She seemed close to her brother." 

Cyra strained her ears as she listened in to the conversation, only to hear a scoff coming from behind her.

"Eavesdropping now, Moores? That's unusual even for you." 

Cyra nearly jumped out of her skin, much to her chagrin since this earned a smirk from her rival.

"Last night you asked me if I was over it….Over what? Why is everyone being so weird?" 

She finally demanded, only to be caught off guard by the suddenly surprised look that flashed across the messy-haired girl's face.

"You really don't know, do you? Jacob's dead." 

It felt like a cold wave washed over.

"Shut up! You're lying." 

She began, fists clenching at her sides. 

It wasn't true.

It couldn't be. Not with every other shitty thing that had happened that summer.

"Hey if you don't believe me find a copy of the daily profit from about two weeks ago. I can't believe you didn't know, didn't your parents tell you?"

Cyra bit back a response at that as it became hard to breathe. Merula had to be wrong, she  _ had  _ to be wrong. Her parents wouldn't keep this from her.

They wouldn't.

She didn't even think as she pushed Merula aside before bolting out.

She had to get answers and if Merula was lying, then whatever gods were out there better be with her because Cyra  _ would  _ make the other pureblood regret ever crossing her.

  
  


* * *

_ Stop thinking about that blood traitor already! People lose people every day. _

Merula told herself, though she couldn't shake the rather unwelcome feeling in her chest. She had been a little kid when her parents—and her innocence—had been taken from her and though they weren't dead, it had hurt.

No, hurt was an understatement. 

  
  


How much worse would direct betrayal by one's parents be? How much worse to know someone you had wished to see again was dead after years of not being in your life?

Merula groaned and glared across the room at her roommate's color-changing blankets, trying to figure out what the point of such a thing was in a vain attempt to keep from thinking of her rival.

After all, there was no way in hell she was going to go soft now. Not after two years of making people either fear or respect her.

No, she was  _ not  _ going back to how it was before. How it would be if she didn't keep people at bay.

Though  _ maybe  _ she shouldn't really rile Moores for a while, after all, beating Moores at anything right now would prove nothing at all as Cyra would have her mind elsewhere. 

  
  



	3. Confusion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cyra ponders over her parents keeping Jacobs death a secret and Rowan is a good friend.

The letters she wrote home were accusatory at best and disrespectful at worse but she had to know. Why had her parents kept this from her? Had there been a funeral? If so, why had she not been taken?

Why did she have to find out **_at school_ ** and by the one person she did not want to appear weak around? Why didn't her mum tell her anything?

She found solace in a secluded part of the courtyard, a book of spells laying in front of her though she wasn't really able to focus on the words, thankful that the day had seemed to pass rather quickly.

She heard footsteps approaching and instantly reached over to the pocket her wand was in, only to relax when she saw the familiar Ravenclaw blue.

"Hey." 

She sighed, earning a look.

"It's almost time for lunch, I thought we could walk together." 

Rowan responded, sitting beside her on the grass.

"You go on. I'll see you in our next class."

  
  


* * *

  
  
  
  
  


"Hey, you have to eat something." Rowan's voice snapped her from her thoughts, causing her to actually look up from the book she had been staring at for the past several minutes.

"I'm not hungry." 

The words were curt, harsh even, though the Ravenclaw knew from experience that this was just a defense mechanism for the tomboyish Slytherin.

"You have to at least _try._ Running yourself down isn't going to solve anything." Rowan tried, earning a sigh.

"I know but I just can't wrap my mind around it. Why didn't my mum just tell me? I bet that was half of why my dad suddenly left." Cyra sighed, burying her face into her hands.

Rowan wished that they had an answer for that question but instead of saying anything they just moved to put an arm around the girl, who leaned into her side.

"The whole reason I was searching for the vaults was to find my brother and now that he...That they found him...All of that trouble was for nothing." 

  
  


They stayed like that for some time before Cyra finally sighed and stood, holding a hand out to the Ravenclaw.

"Come on, I might not be hungry but I'm not letting you waste away."

  
  



	4. Snake In The Grass

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which someone falls off a broom and a temporary truce is called.

Merula knew she shouldn't care about what Cyra Moores was going through, hell, she didn't  **_want_ ** to. However, in flying class that day she watched as the usually gifted flyer overcorrected her broom and landed flat on the ground.

"Merlin's beard, Moores. Are you  _ trying  _ to break your own neck?" She asked, earning a look from the obviously dazed girl on the ground.

"Eat slugs, Snyde." 

Cyra retorted, sitting up with a wince.

Something that didn't go unnoticed by Merula, who could see how the other third-year seemed to be favoring her left arm.

_ I knew there was no way she would be uninjured from that fall unless there was a cushioning charm involved. _

She thought, though before she could say anything, Madame Hooch was hovering over them.

"Snyde, Moores, What happened?"

  
  


"Overcorrected...I  _ think _ ." Cyra responded glancing over at Merula before letting out a huff as she shakily stood, her face turning pale as she let out a hiss and grabbed her arm.

"You think? You nearly hit the wall. Come on, I'll walk you to the hospital wing." 

Merula rolled her eyes at the skeptical expression.

"Take this as a temporary truce. Besides you  _ are Slytherin _ and  _ we  _ can't afford to lose any more quidditch matches." 

  
  
  
  
  


The walk to the hospital wing was a quiet one, with Cyra alternating between glaring at her and seeming to zone out.

"You know, before, when I…In first year…" Merula began, only to let out a huff of annoyance at herself "damn it I am not good at this. I'm sorry about your brother." 

It made her want to hex herself just for saying that but that didn't make it any less true. She knew all too well what loss felt like and—while their situations were  _ much  _ different—she really wouldn't wish that sort of pain on anyone.

  
  


It didn't come as a surprise when Cyra smirked.

"Pigs must be sprouting wings because you  _ almost  _ sounded human." 

Merula glared, rolling her eyes.

_ This is exactly what happens whenever I am actually trying to be nice. _

She thought, though even she would have to admit that the aggression  _ might  _ not have been for no reason.

"Yeah well, don't get used to it." 

  
  
  
  


* * *

"Wait, Merula said that? You mean  _ the _ same girl who has made people's lives hell here for the past two years?" Penny asked as they waited for the skele-grow to finish working on repairing Cyra's arm.

"I know, like no offense to Slytherin house but Merula is the definition of the muggle phrase: snake in the grass." 

Cyra retorted, earning a snicker in response before Penny retorted

"Too bad you can't repel her like you can an actual snake."

"Or drive her away with an Aguamenti charm like you can with a cat."

Cyra couldn't help but laugh at that, the mental image of someone shutting the braggart up with a blast of water to the face too appealing.

  
  


"You know, I think I would pay someone three galleons just to see her reaction to that."


	5. Vulnerabilities

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Something that no one would believe happens as a brief truce is called. 
> 
> Or 
> 
> Merula allows a hint of emotion to show.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I know that in game Merula shows very brief moments of "not being a total jerkass" though these are short lived.
> 
> Basically Merula will alternate through the story between "semi-decent" to "I definitely want to punch her."

"So are you giving up on the vaults?" 

The question sent a bolt of bitterness through her. Whatever R was, whatever any of the bloody mess even was, definitely was not worth risk to anyone else.

She would  _ not  _ be the cause of any deaths because if the daily profit had been correct, he had been killed with a curse and who was to say if whatever or whoever had killed him wouldn't target anyone else trying to open the vault?

"I was hoping to find answers to where my brother was and if he was still alive, now that he is dead I don't have to deal with that now do I?" 

She snapped at the first year. She had decided already to follow Dumbledor's request of leaving the vaults to the professionals  _ but  _ this just sealed it.

"Do you think it was a death eater? The papers said…" 

Cyra tuned him out. 

Death eaters, kill curses, vaults. What did any of it matter anymore? Her brother was dead and Dumbledor had already gotten professionals involved. There was no need

for her to get involved.

Not anymore. 

"Can you guys lay off?" Penny finally spoke up, effectively causing the group of younger students to shut up.

"I owe you one," Cyra muttered before turning her attention to her food.

She allowed the constant chatter to turn into a dull roar around her as she tried to ignore Rowan's worried looks.

To her surprise, even Merula (who made comment over and again about her intermingling with other houses) had kept mostly quiet, instead choosing to focus on impressing some Slytherin first years with brags about her prowess in charms.

It didn't annoy her quite as much as it usually did, mostly because at the moment she really didn't care about much of anything.

-

* * *

She couldn't sleep, not with everything running through her head. Not with so many unanswered questions. Letting out a sigh she slipped from her bed and headed toward the common room.

The room was painted in an odd blue light from the moonlight filtering through the black lake overhead, the fire having been dosed to embers.

She didn't even notice someone sitting in one corner of the room until she very nearly tripped over a backpack of some sort.

"What the hell?"

She mumbled, only to hear a familiar scoff.

"Ever hear of Lumos, Moores? You just…" 

Cyra responded by wordlessly casting Lumos Maxima, earning a grunt of irritation from the other girl.

"Arese hole." 

Cyra managed to find her way to the sofa, letting the light go out, though not before she noticed the source of the humming being a pair of puffskiens sitting on Merula's lap.

_ Okay, Merula has a soft side...Or wants to use those things as Cruciatus practice. _

She thought before letting out a sigh.

"What time even is it?"

She finally asked.

"Something past three? I don't know, I've been sitting here long enough I swear I saw one of the squid's tentacles drift past."

Merula responded before sighing

"I'm going to the kitchens...Keep an eye on these two fur-balls. Would hate to have to tell Hagrid that one hopped behind a bookcase and got squished." 

Cyra then found herself suddenly forced to hold the two custard colored fur-balls as her self proclaimed rival slipped from the room.

  
  
  


Several minutes later Merula slipped back inside, dropping an armload of snacks onto the table in front of the couch. 

"Help yourself but the chocolate pastries are mine." She said, prompting Cyra to arch a brow.

"I take it that we are still in that truce?" She guessed, earning an irritated look from Merula.

"Blame sleep-deprivation and one too many shots of fire whiskey." 

Cyra snickered at that.

"What? Don't you believe me?"

Cyra found herself smirking.

"Not really, not after you spit an acid pop clear across the common room last year." 

Merula narrowed her eyes at that before allowing herself to return her attention to the food.

"You have room to talk, you turned green while trying every flavored beans!"

  
  


"That thing tasted like rotten fish smells, thank you very much."

Cyra was surprised by—what she assumed to be—quiet laughter coming from her rival.

"You definitely have a way with words."

Merula stated, though there was surprisingly no judgment there.

_ Okay, is this a boggart or did Merula give herself brain damage some way? _

Cyra wondered, though before she could bring it up one of the fluffy creatures leaped onto the table and promptly wrapped it's tongue around one of the small tarts, effectively pulling the whole pastry into its mouth.

"Hey! Go forage for spiders and leave my food alone you overgrown cotton puff." 

A silence drifted over them for some time before Merula spoke again.

"I didn't poison it if  _ that  _ is what you're worried about." 

  
  


Cyra couldn't help but glare through the dark at the other girl as she said.

"I don't know what you're playing at but…"

Cyra began, only to be cut off.

"You asked if this was part of a truce...Then fine, take this as a metaphorical olive branch until things calm down. I  _ still  _ don't like you but…."

Merula trailed off as if she was struggling to find the words.

"But I know what it is like to lose people for good."

The statement hung between them in the air for several minutes before Cyra finally spoke.

"You're parents." She guessed, earning a sigh.

"Life sentences in Azkaban. It happened barely after my tenth birthday." 

Merula responded and the silence that followed was so thick that it could be cut with a knife.

"You never get to see them?"

Cyra dared ask, not sure how exactly the law worked exactly or even Azkaban even worked.

"Azkaban only allows visitors in special circumstances. I...I don't want to talk about it."

  
  


The rare show of vulnerability caught Cyra off guard. How in the hell could she respond to  _ this? _ She hadn't even been aware that Merula  _ could  _ actually show real emotion besides anger.

"You don't have to." 

  
  


"If you tell anyone about this…"

  
  


It was a thinly veiled threat but at least this was the Merula she was used to.

"Do you think anyone would actually believe me?"


	6. In Darkness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Merula deals with thoughts and emoitons.

Cyra didn't know how to take this side of Merula, who had once again become preoccupied with the small animals in front of them. This was different from the girl she had come to know. 

"Can you stop staring?"

Cyra had never been thankful for darkness as much as she had been at that moment because she could feel her face flushing.

"Sorry. I just can't stop zoning out." Cyra responded.

"Yeah, well zone out at the window, not at me."

* * *

Merula hated that she felt so much sympathy for the other girl. After all, where was the sympathy for her when her parents were taken? 

Where was the sympathy for a  _ child  _ having the innocence ripped from them in a flash of green light that left an Auror dead on the floor in front of her?

Where was the sympathy when  **_everyone_ ** started comparing her to her parents? When people started acting like she was the plague?

It wasn't fair. 

"I'm going to bed." 

She finally said, standing.

She wouldn't allow herself to be weak. Not again. Not when she was so close to proving herself as strong.

"Thanks for tonight. I owe you."

"I'll hold you to that, Moores."

  
  
  


Darting into the Slytherin girl's bathroom, Merula cast a quick silencing charm before slamming her first into the wall.

_ Why are the thoughts so damn intrusive tonight? First that bloody dream and now this shit.  _

She shuddered at the memory of the dream that had caused her to wake up in a cold sweat. 

_ I need to get madame Pomfrey to give me more peace drought or dreamless sleep...Something to keep this shit from happening. _

She thought, closing her eyes and trying to will away the knot in the back of her throat, although as she did she still heard the scream and gasp, followed by the sickening sound of a body hitting the ground, her mother—who she was closest to—holding the wand that had fired the curse.

Just how many had her parents killed? Tortured? When they had left her with a sitter for—as they explained—business trips, had it really on missions to take an innocent life? 

Was everyone right?  **_Was_ ** she destined to be like them? To end up in Azkaban to be driven mad by creatures that locked you in your own misery?

Did her mother even remember her? Were her parents even still alive? Would her aunt even tell her if they weren't?

  
  
  
  



	7. Not as she seems

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some surprising facts are revealed about Cyra.

Soon the first weekend had rolled around and soon Cyra found herself standing in the room of the dueling club, watching as red and blue sparks blasted across the walls as the duelist's dodged the blows.

"Hey Moores, you and me up next."

Cyra glared over at the familiar voice, taking note that Merula's usually two-toned hair seemed an even brighter orange than usual.

"Sure. Just know I'm going to enjoy beating you again." 

She retorted, watching the familiar smirk on her rival's face. 

"You got lucky last time Moores." 

As they got into the dueling stance, Cyra allowed the now familiar competitiveness to fill her.

  
  


* * *

  
  


Merula was surprised by the strength of the blasts and the cold, calculating look that the other girl had adopted.

She hadn't seen that look since first year when she had stepped to Ben's defense but this time was different.

Merula knew the signs well and so, without second thought went all out.

It ended in a tie, with both nursing various injuries, including a bloody nose for Cyra.

"You've got more aggressive over the years, I take full credit." 

Merula retorted, earning a nod.

"Yeah, I'll give you that one. I never would have imagined fighting anyone or even knowing how to fight with magic honestly." 

Cyra retorted, wiping the blood with the back of her wrist. 

"You know, I always imagined you crying if I hurt you badly enough. Kinda disappointed you didn't." Merula said, earning a scoff.

"You're looking at the person who's parents were so paranoid about setting off the ministry that they insisted on me healing the muggle way after I fell off a swing and broke my arm in primary school."

_ Afraid to set off the ministry? Why would…unless. _

"You went to muggle school?"

Cyra sighed.

"Yes. We live in a mixed community and it would look weird if we hadn't gone to school when it is so close to us. At least they now have the excuse of me studying abroad. What, going to make fun of me for  _ that  _ too?"

The tone took the other girl by surprise. She had seen Cyra angry, certainly and both of them had verbally brought each other down. This was beyond that.

This was something raw, something even more of a sore spot than Jacob had been during those first two years.

There was something that wasn't adding up for Merula and against her better judgment she wanted to know what it was.

" _ Actually _ , no. I'm just surprised. I mean, you did mention that your family is generations of Slytherin." 

Merula wasn't sure what to make of it as they stood at the back of the room while some more students took center stage, their yelps, and commands ringing through the air.

"My dad's side. My mum's...Well, they're a mixed bag. Weak blood was what my grandfather called them."

"Your pure blood...or at least your father is." She guessed, watching as Cyra's expression darkened.

"That doesn't matter. Blood nor magic doesn't matter. I'm going to go get patched up." 

After she left, Merula tried to wrap her mind around what she had just heard.

It was obvious from what Cyra had said that Cyra was at least a half-blood. Yet, she didn't seem to hold either traditional pure-blood or Slytherin values.

Though there were  _ rare  _ sparks of  _ something  _ inside of her. Something ambitious and perhaps even dangerous.

"Hey Death Eater, bet I can beat you!" A Gryffindor girl sneered toward her, snapping her out of her thoughts.

"In your dreams."

Cyra had confused her before but now what she  _ thought  _ she had knew about the other witch just didn't seem to fit, at least not as neatly as she had assumed that it would.

  
  
  



	8. All the things said

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Cyra realizes she made a lot of mistakes in the past as well and Merula receives a letter.

"You and Merula are going to end up killing one another one of these days," Rowan commented as soon as Cyra met up with them for lunch.

"Gossip spreads at Hogwarts faster than dragon pox." Cyra retorted as she slid into her seat and began to fill the plate in front of her "let me guess, someone told Penny and  _ she  _ told you?" 

"Yes! Evidently, Ben saw you in the hospital wing with Chiara and assumed you got into a fight with Merula. What happened?"

  
  


Cyra rolled her eyes at that.

_ Of course, he did. The guy carries a teddy bear and literally is afraid of thunder. _

She thought before sighing.

"Yes, it was Merula that gave me the bloody nose,  _ no  _ we were not fighting but it was a weird accident during a duel  _ in duel club _ . Nothing to freak out over  _ at all. _ "

  
  


"Nothing to freak out? Need I remind you about the devil's snare?" 

Rowan retorted, earning a sigh.

"Row, we were what? Eleven? Twelve at most? Merula spent the last two years being a complete arse but I  _ do  _ share a common room with her and  _ sometimes  _ she isn't so bad. I mean, she's bad but not  _ that bad. _ " 

Cyra could tell Rowan thought she was crazy for that statement and sighed.

"Just, trust me on this. Merula is...well let's just say most days I would love to see her fly straight into a tree but she isn't completely horrible."

  
  


"Okay, who are you and what did you do with the Cyra Moores I know? Because  _ she  _ would have  **_never_ ** said that." 

Rowan responded, causing Cyra to chuckle.

"Come on, trust me. I am not saying that calling people names and shoving Barnaby into the fountain every time he says something stupid is right but I also don't think that Merula is  **_as_ ** bad a person as she lets on to be." 

"What? Hello, this is the same girl who tortured you about your….never mind." Ben began, though he didn't finish that sentence.

"Yes and I also brought up her parents a few times if you'll remember." 

The realization poured over her like molten lead. 

_ If Merula attempted to apologize over what she said maybe I should. I was honestly being just as big of a brat as she was. _

* * *

Cyra was surprised when she found Merula alone in the owlery. A crumpled letter in her hand.

"Bad news from home?" 

She guessed as she turned her attention to a grey owl that flew down to greet her.

"Shut up Moores." 

Cyra just rolled her eyes and ran a hand along the feathers of the owl's back.

"Think you could take a letter to Charles? Maybe  _ he  _ can give me some answers." She spoke to the owl, which fluttered and let out a low call in response.

"I know, you hate Neptune. I would use a school owl but I doubt they've had much experience with a Kneazle before." 

  
  


After tying a note onto the owl's leg, Cyra turned toward the door.

"Hey, Snyde...What I said about your parents...I'm sorry. Sometimes when I get mad I speak before thinking and it's not like I really have much room to talk." 

* * *

_ It's not like I really have much room to talk. _

The words kept repeating in Merula's head, adding something else that didn't make sense.

Was that an implication that goody-two-shoes had family that was, in fact, death eaters? Was that why her mother had been paranoid about the ministry? 

It would make sense but why did she freak out at the sound of Voldemort's name? She, of all people, should know it was  **_just a name._ **

Unless…..

  
  


There was more to that story. There  _ had  _ to be. 

_ Maybe I should do some research into the Moores.  _ She thought,  _ Maybe I can take little miss popularity down a peg or two. _

As she stood, she glanced down at the letter and—ignoring the way her chest tightened—pulled out her wand. 

Letting the paper land on the filth covered floor, she took aim.

"Incendio!"

_ Fine, more time to deal with stupid idiots and find the next vault. If I manage to get into a better light now, no one will ever treat me as a second rate cast off again. _

_ They will be proud to know who I am. _

  
  



	9. Gossip

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which magical or not, teenagers are still teenagers.

The Sphinx club was located right off the Ravenclaw tower, the skylights and stained glass letting in an array of light and making it a nearly perfect place for Cyra to meet up with Rowan to do homework.

That was it  _ would  _ be if other students didn't also have the same idea or—more particularly—that others just wanted to spend the afternoon socializing. 

  
  
  


"So there is an interesting rumor circulating about a certain purple-eyed Slytherin." 

The look Cyra sent Penny could have melted metal.

"Can you stop that? I defended her, so  _ what _ ? We're both Slytherin  _ and  _ She's not always an ass...Not anymore anyway."

"Stop what?"

Penny retorted, smirking as the other girl tossed a ball of parchment at her.

"You know very well what! Now, what is this news? I have a transfiguration paper to write."

Cyra retorted, earning a grin.

"Well since you seem to suddenly care so much about Merula, you may want to know that rumor has it that she and Tulip Karasu have split ways. Apparently, Tulip broke a promise to Merula and they had a huge row in the courtyard." 

Penny responded, earning an arched brow.

"Who's Tulip?"

Surprisingly it was Rowan who spoke up.

"She's in Ravenclaw. Remember the owlery being damaged by that explosion last year? Yeah,  _ that  _ was her doing. Something about an extra-large dung bomb." 

  
  


"Okay, so Merula and this Tulip chick had an argument. What exactly does that have to do with me?"

  
  


"Well since you and Merula are friends…"

Cyra cut Penny off before she could finish.

"First off, if she hears you say that she will turn your head into a pumpkin. second, I would not go that far." 

"I was just going to say, keep an eye on her. Her and Tulip have been close ever since first year and I'm sure even little miss ego has emotions deep down in there somewhere. She'll probably be really defensive and you  **_do_ ** share a common room with her."

  
  


Cyra sighed then and glanced up.

"Thank you for the concern but I value  _ not  _ getting hit with Slugulus Eructo. I am  **_not_ ** going to try to discuss anything with little miss snarky unless she instigates it."

  
  


Cyra retorted before adding as if on a second thought

"Also, tell  _ whoever  _ put a bedazzling spell on the  **_inside_ ** my backpack that I thank them for the headache this morning….I think the flare also woke Liz up and it was just too early to hear about fire crabs and murtlaps." 

  
  


"That sounds like Tonks."

  
  


"Well tell Tonks to knock it off. The dung bombs were one thing, nearly blinding me is another."

  
  


* * *

"I swear there is not enough fire whiskey in all of Europe to convince me to play truth or dare with them  **_ever_ ** again." 

Cyra grumbled as soon as Penny left, earning a snicker from Rowan.

"Oh come on, they only say stuff like that to get a reaction out of you!" 

"Yeah, well it's really bloody annoying. I have Penny, a bunch of second years, Ben, and even Chiara asking dumb questions. Pretty sure Merula  _ would  _ but she has seemingly been cutting me a break."

Cyra retorted, earning a grin.

"They're driving you mental too, huh?" 

Cyra groaned and leaned back onto the floor.

"I was hoping the Ravenclaws weren't so nosey."

"Oh we're not, we're just curious about everything."

Rowan retorted, earning them a mock groan.

"That's possibly even worse!"

  
  


Rowan just laughed.

"So  _ do  _ you fancy anyone? Pretty sure half of our houses have a betting pool going about  _ Us  _ and while you're my best mate I don't think I want to kiss you." 

  
  


Cyra let out a snort as she maneuvered herself to sit against the wall.

"Nope. Honestly, for the past two years, I was set on finding out what happened to my brother. Never really thought about who I fancied."

"So you  _ don't  _ have a crush because rumor has it…." 

Cyra didn't think twice about lightly shoving the Ravenclaw, though she just grinned in response to the teasing.

"Whatever is floating around isn't true and you know it.  **_You_ ** would be the first to know if I ever  **_did_ ** develop a crush, you are my best friend after all."

  
  
  
  
  



	10. Opposite

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Cyra fails at making friends and Merula has issues.

Cyra arched a brow as she watched Tonks do a pretty impressive imitation of Snape, unable not to join in the laughter as the Metamorphmagus shapeshifted into the before mentioned instructor. 

"Sometimes I worry about your sanity." 

She commented. She hadn't really gotten to know the pink-haired girl but she had to admit, Tonks had a way to draw people to her, even if sometimes the jokes were irritating.

"Oh lighten up Moores!" 

Tonk's real voice came through and Cyra was pretty sure she had come across the wrong way.

"Hey, I never said it wasn't funny. Just that I think you are a few knuts short a sickle sometimes…Also if you ever bedazzle my pack or anything else again...I will personally knock you off your broom and into the lake."

"You know, for a snake, you are as intimidating as a mouse."

Cyra just chuckled and leaned back on her hands.

"And you're cunning for a badger." 

  
  


* * *

"You know, you could try to be a little nicer to Tonks. She's starting to think you don't like her." 

Penny said as they walked back to the castle, earning a sigh from Cyra.

"I like Tonks just fine. I just don't exactly know how to get on with her. She just soo…" 

Cyra trailed off, waving a hand in the air as though trying to call an answer to herself.

"Energetic? The opposite of you?"

Penny supplied, earning a sigh.

"Yeah. Maybe she is right...I need to lighten up." Cyra admitted, shouldering her broom.

"Hey, tomorrow's Sunday. A bunch of us are going to meet up near the reserve and just hang out. You should come."

Penny suggested, earning a sigh.

"Yeah, I should. Can I ask Rowan if they want to come?"

"Sure! Invite whoever!"

-

* * *

Merula felt someone staring at her through the darkness as she aimed hex after hex at the sparring dummies along the back wall of the dueling chambers.

_ Fine, if they want a show I can give them one. _

She thought, making a jagged motion with her wand before shouting the command

"Defodio!"

The metal target promptly burst into pieces, as though torn apart by an invisible swordsman.

"You really  **_are_ ** a lot stronger than people give you credit for. That spell is usually reserved for seventh years." 

The comment caught her by surprise.

"Glad someone finally sees it." 

She retorted, muttering the incantation for repairing before sighing.

She was  _ not  _ in the mood for this.

"Don't you have anything better to do than spy on me, Moores?"

She could hear Cyra approaching her and even in the near-darkness of the room, she could practically feel that blasted pitying look that she was sure was there.

"I was headed to the dorms to have a bath before dinner  _ but  _ I heard what sounded like a mountain troll tearing down a wall so I came to see what was going on. Never expected a third year using a seventh level spell."

Merula closed her eyes. It sounded so  _ weird  _ for Moores of all people to be praising her for something. Wasn't this the same person who had never let her live down the mishaps with the broom during their first year? The same person who had literally told her, not even two months prior, that she was destined to end up like her parents?

"Yeah well, you don't know a lot about a lot of things, Moores. Now get lost before I make you regret it." 

  
  


Once she was alone Merula took aim again. Maybe everyone was right, maybe she was inherently a horrible person. Maybe she was doomed to rot in Azkaban just like they were.

Maybe that was why everyone always left.

  
  



	11. To Relize

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Cyra cements her decisions about the vaults.(and also makes some uncomfortable realizations about her first two years at hogwarts.)

"Is it just me or is Merula more of a she-demon than usual?" Rowan asked the next morning at breakfast, watching as the girl in question practically terrorized a first-year Hufflepuff.

"Merula is Merula. When isn't she some level of she-demon?"

Cyra retorted before taking a drink of her tea, though her mind flashed back to that night in the common room when she saw some of Merula's walls lower just slightly.

She certainly wasn't a demon  _ then _ but more of a feral cat of some sort. Not that she would tell anyone about that. 

When the muffin she was about to bite into exploded in her face, she glanced over at Rowan who was trying their best not to laugh, and Ben who just looked startled.

"Exploding bonbons."

Cyra muttered, closing her eyes as she wiped at her face.

_ How and when...It doesn't matter.  _

She thought as she heard quite a bit of laughter from the other tables.

"Looks like inanimate objects even hate you now, Moores." 

Cyra rolled her eyes.

"Go bark at someone else. It's too early for your nonsense."

* * *

_ Loosen up. _

The words repeated in Cyra's mind. She had been so dead set on finding her brother she really hadn't realized how closed off she had become. 

_ Yeah, no wonder my friends back home said boarding school changed me. _

She thought as she grabbed her hoard of treats that her parents had sent (instead of a letter) and her broom before sighing and glanced over at her rather socially awkward roommate Liz Tuttle.

  
  


"Hey, a bunch of us are going into the reserve to hang out. Want to come?" 

She watched as the girl looked up from her book, eyes widening. 

"You're actually inviting me?" 

  
  


Cyra sighed. 

_ Did I really give that big of an impression that I dislike her? _

"Yeah, I am. We've been roommates since forever. Guess I was always too preoccupied with the vaults to really get to know anyone outside of Rowan, Ben, Penny, and Chiara." 

  
  


_ And Chiara just  _ **_happened_ ** _ because I wanted to figure out what was going on with the werewolf rumor.  _

She reminded herself mentally, realizing that  _ perhaps  _ Merula had a point with some of her accusations early on, or at least somewhat of one anyway.

The vaults really **_had_** started driving her mad.

_ I really need to start actually caring about what's going on around me. I mean, outside of all the bullocks with Merula and the Werewolf fiasco all I thought about was those bloody vaults. I nearly got Rowan killed and I put Bill and god only knows who else in danger too. _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Also no, it wasn't Merula who put the Bonbons in Cyra's food.
> 
> Kids will be kids and add kids + magic + the weird kid = trouble / pranks.


	12. Reasonings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Cyra talks with Tonks and Penny gets a bit miffed.

"Maybe I should buy some of these and plant them in Merula's dorm."

Cyra said as she tossed around a blue and red firework, smirking when she earned a look from Penny.

"I thought we agreed you would take it easy on Merula?"

  
  


"Oh come on, a bunch of harmless fireworks scaring her half to death isn't the same as blasting her with Furnunculus. Besides, my house or not she can be a bloody prat." Cyra retorted.

  
  


"Prat is an understatement." 

Rowan agreed, earning a chuckle from half of the group.

"I have to agree. She can be a bloody bitch." Tonks retorted, suddenly taking the shape of the aforementioned girl and doing a rather comedic impersonation, causing their group to burst into laughter. 

"Please  **_never_ ** do that again. Now every time she challenges me to a duel I'm going to burst into laughter thinking of the Tonksfied version." 

"Then my work is done. Some humility will do her some good. Did you hear what she said to the first year Gryffindor yesterday?"

  
  


Cyra sighed as she half-listened to the latest gossip about what her housemates had gotten up to. Merula and her group of weirdos usually got up to something at _least_ _twice_ a day and Cyra found herself at odds with them at least thrice more than that so this was nothing new and besides that, her mind was still stuck on what Penny had said.

It was nearly painfully obvious by Liz's reaction that she had  _ almost _ been stereotypically Slytherin or either just an antisocial dolt who thought about nothing but the stupid vaults and barely anything else.

That had been until Rowan had gotten hurt. She had—after all—started to realize there was more at stake then. She had even taken a break from the vaults and had met Caira Lobosca and the equally talented and irritating Gryffindor Skye Parkins.

Yet she went  **_back_ ** to the vaults in the midst of the second year and endangered Bill Weasley. 

"Hey, Cyra. You okay over there? You look like that Ben kid did when Nick showed off the executioner's handy work."

Tonk's voice ripped her from her thoughts.

"Actually, can I talk with you for a minute?"

"Sure." 

  
  
  


Cyra knew she shouldn't be intimidated by the other girl, after all, she had to deal with more intimidating people on the daily. Yet here she was, intimidated by the mischievous Hufflepuff.

  
  


"I know that ever since we met I've been a bit….well to be blunt, I've been a complete tosser lately."

She confessed, only to find the other girl's hand on her shoulder a second later.

"Hey, you lost a brother, and from what I hear your parents haven't been a big help. No one blames you for being a bit narky, mate." 

Tonks's response caught Cyra off guard. They weren't very close, having only  _ officially  _ met this year, and yet, something about Tonks made her believe the girl as sincere.

"Maybe, but I passed some really unfair judgments on you and I'm sorry for it."

  
  


Tonk's just arched a brow.

"Well, I thought you had no sense of humor at all so I guess I can forgive you." 

  
  


* * *

"So the first Hogsmeade trip is in a week, right? I  _ should  _ be able to get my marks up enough to go. I mean I  _ did  _ barely scrape by last year outside of Charms, flying, and potions."

Cyra said as they walked back toward Hogwarts for lunch, both her and Tonks relatively dirty from what had been an attempt at a race which ended with them both being saved serious injury by Rowan's cushioning charm.

"Hey, I could always tutor you. I'm pretty good with the history of magic." Rowan responded, earning a sigh.

"Thanks, Rowen. That is one class I hate with a passion." Cyra said, then added as if on afterthought "Speaking of passion, where did Skye vanish off to Penny? We had a friendly Wednesday and she wasn't there." 

  
  


"She took a bludger to the shoulder during a private training course with Gryffindor. She'll be alright to play by the match next week. I thought you didn't like Skye?" Penny answered, causing the Slytherin to groan.

_ Great, now I have to explain myself to the Skye Parkins fangirl. _

She thought as she tried to find the right words to use.

"It's not that I don't like her. It's just that I think she has her royal head up her royal ass so far that she no longer sees common sense." 

  
  


"And yet you defend Merula, who does the same thing."

The tone of Penny's response caused her to really wish she could turn into a bird and fly away.

"I don't deny Merula is a bitch but there is a difference between them. Sure, they both have skills they brag about but Skye has a superiority complex, Merula is just a blowhard with a nasty streak….besides...at least I  **_can_ ** flatten Merula." 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I literally know next to nothing about British slang. So any advice is appreciated.
> 
> Also as a note, Cyra is only defensive about Merula because of the bits of her softer side that she has seen. You'll see in late chapters Cyra sort of bullied Merula back in year 2.


	13. Hidden

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Residental dumbass starts messing with something she doesn't understand.
> 
> Also slight Merula, Barnaby, and Ismelda bashing.

The week leading up to the first Hogsmeade trip seemed to pass at the pace of a snail, or at least for Cyra it did.

  
  


"You know, we should make a giant bomb of gobstone goo that would explode right in Merula's face." 

"I doubt the scent would really phase her. She hangs around that Murk girl and I don't think she  _ ever  _ bathes."

"Surprise there. Death eaters probably think they are  **_above_ ** the notion of non-magical bathing."

  
  
  


Cyra arched a brow as she glanced over at the group of second years that were whispering.

_ Remind me to tip off Flix about this...We don't need the dorms to smell like dragon dung for the next week. _

  
  
  


She thought as she returned to her books, eager to finish the essay she had due for potions class  _ before  _ the weekend since she and Rowan had planned to spend most of the weekend hanging out and she was not going to let anything ruin her first Hogsmeade trip.

Even  **_if_ ** it did mean saving Merula from total humiliation, though she did think that the idea was pretty much harmless and Merula had done enough to deserve it.

Just the rest of the Slytherin girls really  _ shouldn't  _ be stuck smelling like the fusion of dung and rotten eggs for a week just because Merula and her band of followers were being complete gits.

  
  
  
  


As soon as Rowan's next class ended, Cyra went to meet her so they could walk to lunch together.

"You should just let it happen." Rowan said, "I mean, look at how much they've put people through."

"Oh trust me, I **_would_** but I would rather not come to class smelling like some sort of mix between rotten eggs and tar, and let me tell you, the scent _would_ travel in the dungeons." 

  
  


"That makes me glad I got sorted into Ravenclaw...Well, that and I couldn't imagine sharing a space with the terrible trio." Rowan retorted, earning a scoff from Cyra.

"More like two twits and Barnaby. He's a few knuts short a sickle. I honestly don't know why or how Merula and Ismelda ensnared him in their inner circle. I mean, a first-year tricked him into drinking a so-called potion which was really just castor oil and cinnamon."

  
  


This earned a giggle from Rowan.

"I can imagine how well  _ that  _ worked for him."

Cyra finally chuckled, a slight smirk on her face as she said:

"I think Merula actually had to go to the hospital wing to get him a potion because he was afraid to leave the toilets. Evidently, she nearly hit him with the bottle levitating it to him." 

  
  


* * *

Merula's eyes burned as she ducked behind the bookcase, the dim light in the currently closed library threatening to give her a headache if she didn't find what she was looking for.

That was if Filch didn't find her first, though she was pretty sure the cat-repelling perfume she had made would keep that nasty feline at bay since everything about the scent would scream—to a cat—danger. Which, she had to admit, worked pretty well for her limited knowledge of felines.

As she drew closer to one of the shelves, she noticed the air growing strangely colder. This  _ had to be it _ .

She thought.

_ This has to be the entrance to the cursed vault….but how do I get it to open? Maybe there is something from the last vault...Looks like I'll need to make a second trip and bring the others with me. Who knows  _ **_what_ ** _ could be in there. _

  
  
  



	14. Plans and Mistakes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cyra plans some pranks and gets looped into doing something she really doesn't want to.

Cyra followed Tonks to Zonko's, making a mental note to be extra careful of any soap or...well anything else for a while, lest she falls victim to the Hufflepuff's pranks. Rowan had gone off to get a new quill and some stationary and while Cyra normally would have gone with them, she  **_also_ ** didn't want to spend all day inside a pen shop.

  
  


"So where  _ is  _ Penny? She said she would walk with us?" Cyra asked, earning a shrug from the pink-haired prankster.

"No idea? She said something about us needing to bond or something. I don't understand. We get on just fine?" 

Tonks responded, before very nearly falling as her boot caught a loose cobblestone, only to be steadied by the other girl.

"Try to refrain from killing yourself today, please. I'm no potion master like Penny nor am I a healer like Chiara." Cyra quipped, earning a look.

"Ha-ha, very funny. I am not that bad!" Tonks retorted, making an effort to look offended though she relented a moment later, chuckling.

"Okay I am that clumsy but come on. Anyone could have tripped over that!"

  
  


"Only  _ you  _ did that, you can't seem to see where your big feet are landing." Cyra retorted, earning a look though the pink-haired girl just snickered.

"That the best you can come up with? Are you  **_sure_ ** you're Slytherin?"

\-----

Cyra smirked as she pocketed a bunch of small, wet start fireworks that she had just purchased.

She had the  _ perfect  _ idea for what to do with them that involved some of her dorm mates (and Liz, if there was one more Doxy brought into their dorm). 

"Let me guess, Merula giving you a hard time?". Tonks guessed, smirking as she watched the exchange.

"Hey, if I can manage to scare her without **_actually_** stooping to her level, I will. If her ego inflated any more she's going to float away." Cyra retorted "She **_can_** be okay _but_ most of the time she's like a Pixie. Prideful and constantly buzzing about something." 

  
  


"Can be okay? Is she different than her normal super-elite bullocks outside of the public eye or something?" Tonks asked, eyes narrowing slightly in thought.

"Rarely." Cyra answered, not feeling like lying to Tonks "I mean, she's pretty bad but she's not  **_that_ ** bad. She is almost nice sometimes."

"Too bad that almost nice don't come out any other time. Do you even know how hard it is sometimes  _ not  _ to hex that fancy broom of hers?" 

"Trust me, I  _ know. _ But please don't she would be in a permanently horrid mood then and probably take it out on me. Although she  _ is  _ planning on trying out for the frog choir if you want to stuff a dung bomb in the room as she walks in."

  
  


\------

"Oh come on! You need to get your mind off of everything and Flitwick likes you!" Penny said that evening at dinner.

"Yes, and I  **_hate_ ** being in the middle of a crowd. Just because I  **_can_ ** sing doesn't mean that I  **_want_ ** to do it in front of anyone." Cyra retorted around a mouthful of shepherds pie.

"Oh come on! You play quidditch! That is in front of everyone!" 

Cyra sighed and glanced up at her friends, half who was looking at her like they didn't know what to expect.

"Yeah  _ in the air _ and not  _ singing _ ." She retorted.

"You? Sing? Please tell me that you aren't seriously going to try out for the choir? You probably sound like a choking Abraxan."

Cyra rolled her eyes at the jab before sighing and glancing back at Merula.

"Go lick a streeler, Snyde. At least that might shut your mouth for a while." She retorted, earning barely choked back sounds of amusement from her friends.

"Really Mature, Moores." 

As soon as they were left alone, Cyra turned to Penny with a grimace.

"Fine, tell this Tulip chick I'll do it. Just to shut Merula. I don't want to but if it will wipe that bloody smirk off of her face." 

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cyra is going to slowly evolve into a slightly less closed off person.


	15. The Snake Revealed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cyra hangs out with Tonks and Rowan and ends up making a decision that paints a target on her back and sets some things into motion.

Cyra recalled how she had basically used some of the people she called friends. How Chiara had been right not to trust her and how she had been rather unpleasant to Tonks most of the time.

Now that her mind was off the vaults and she realized how horrible she had been, she had to change. She would not become some sort of backstabbing traitorous rat.

Though how could she actually get closer to Chiara—who she had befriended out of convenience—or Tonks—who seemed to have mostly forgiven her after they had actually talked about everything?

Tonks had proven somewhat easy, being able to take a joke and (as the frogspawn in her bath the previous morning attested to) could easily give one back.

Chiara was going to be harder, as would Skye and she couldn't tell either of them the truth because she didn't know which would be scarier, a pissed-off werewolf or getting a bunch of hexed bludgers coming for her next practice.

"Whatcha thinking about?"

Tonk's voice broke her from her thoughts, causing her to sigh.

"Remember what I told you about the first two years?" Cyra replied, earning a look.

"Yes and is  **_this_ ** one of those things?"

Tonk's narrowed her eyes though Cyra just sighed.

"It's not, I swear. I came with you today because I wanted to. It's just, I think I could use your advice. Outside of Penny and Rowan, I don't think I've been honest about most of it. I enjoy Chiara's company and Ben is a good friend but…" 

"But you sort of have been lacking on the social train with them?" 

Cyra was surprised when Tonks cut her off, her words summarizing exactly what Cyra was trying to say.

"Yeah, then there is Skye Parkin, who has helped me a lot and...In spite of our rivalry on the pitch. I'm not good at this socializing thing, Tonks."

Cyra was surprised when Tonks put an arm around her.

"At least you're trying. I'm not used to this teaching thing **_but_** I think you can learn from **_us._** What we are doing now. We had a rocky start but we're okay."

"Yeah after a bath full of tadpoles, hiccup sweets  _ before  _ potions class, and a bed full of stink pellets that I  **_still_ ** am not sure how you got them in there." Cyra retorted, earning a chuckle.

"Metamorphmagus remember?" 

With that, the pink-haired girl smirked and suddenly Cyra was staring at a copy of herself.

"Then how did you get the password?" 

The shapeshifter only grinned wider.

"Peeves."

Cyra sighed and rolled her eyes.

"Of course." She muttered before adding "alright, that's just weird. Change back before I end up with an identity crisis." 

Tonks laughed as she returned to normal.

"Come on, let's meet up with Rowan so they know we didn't murder each other."

Cyra just rolled her eyes at the pink-haired girl's antics. 

"I doubt Rowan would go that far with it Puffle." 

"If  _ that  _ was supposed to be an insult it sounded more like some sort of Puffskien subspecies."

"Hey, better than being called a truffle. Although I think Merula  _ was  _ half asleep when she said that."

* * *

"So you talked to Tonks about your situation? What did she say?"

Rowan said as they stopped in at honeydukes.

"Basically? That I worry too much and too just  _ try."  _ Cyra retorted as she made a mental list of things to get to try over the weekend with some of her in house friends.

"Also I am  _ highly  _ tempted to set an ever bashing boomerang at her. She  **_was_ ** the one who put those pellets in my bed and also evidently shapeshifted into me as she so demonstrated."

Rowan let out a sound that sounded somewhat of a choked giggle from trying to keep themselves quiet.

Cyra just grinned.

"I like Tonks but even you have to admit seeing yourself walking around in front of you is weird."

  
  


Rowan was about to say something when a sudden flash of green light shot through the window, catching both of their attention.

"What the bloody hell was that?"

Cyra muttered as she walked toward the door, hand on her wand just in case.

  
  


"Not so tough are you now?" 

Cyra felt her stomach lurch as she watched a seventh year Slytherin upchucking slugs onto the pathway.

"Bloody hell," Cyra muttered to herself as she found herself locking eyes with the Gryffindor.

"What are you looking at? Do you want…." 

Cyra didn't give her a chance before wordlessly casting a spell, causing the girl's wand to fly about five feet into the air and land right into a mud puddle.

"The hell this over?" 

She asked, earning a sigh from what she assumed was the boy's girlfriend.

"He bumped into that bitch on accident." 

"Leave before I  _ permanently  _ put your head in a bubble." She said, pointing her wand at the other girl, wordlessly casting Lumos and watching her eyes widen and she rushed out of there, nearly falling as she picked up the discarded wand.

"She does know there isn't a spell like that. Right?" The boy muttered, earning a chuckle.

"Obviously not. Who  _ was  _ that cow anyway?" Cyra retorted, rummaging in her bag and pulling out a piece of Treacle and adding:

"Don't ask how it works or why but I've seen Chiara treat Slugulus multiple times." 

"Emily Tyler. Queen bitch of the Gryffindors. Thanks for that, though I'm sure that you're going to end up getting called a death eater by the time she's through."

Cyra rolled her eyes at that.

"Of course she will….She's lucky I didn't turn her head into a pumpkin."

  
  
  



	16. War

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rivalry begins....

A week of tryouts was announced for the frog choir. A week where each student competing would choose a song in a certain range to practice and sing in front of Flitwick and a few other judges. 

A week where she would have to deal with the risk of getting shown up by little miss  _ perfect  _ again.

Why did Cyra Moores  **_have_ ** to always be everywhere? To be seemingly good at most things.

First, it was the duel.

Then it was flying class.

Then she had the audacity to correct her at potions class. Potions were supposed to be  _ her _ thing.

Now, this. Why did Cyra  _ have  _ to try out for the choir? Why couldn't she just leave well enough alone?

Why couldn't she have this one thing? Why did everyone else get to have good things when all she ever got was ridiculed, insulted, or passed by?

Merula slammed her fist into a wall as she fought against the tears she would not allow to fall.

She was  **_not_ ** weak. She would not give anyone the satisfaction of seeing her cry. She didn't need the whispers or pity.

She would never be weak again. 

She waited until she was sure everyone was asleep before sneaking into the dorm of her rival, flinching when a small, black kitten began to rub against her.

"Shh! Go away furball before you make me wake someone up!" She hissed, trying to nudge the tiny creature out of the way before sighing and glancing over at where her rival slept.

_ Fine...Don't need to be directly over there. _

She thought, pointing her wand and muttering a spell.

  
  


* * *

"I feel like something that had passed through a dragon's system….Twice." Cyra grumbled as she sat down at breakfast, sneezing in rapid succession.

  
  


"Looks like the curse of bogeys to me. How long have ya been sick, mate?" Chiara asked, earning a sigh.

"Since like four this morning. I woke up sneezing...and I may have accidentally sent Liz's Puffskien flying."

This earned a snicker from everyone, especially since it was no secret that Cyra's dorm room was pretty much a zoo.

"You probably get to the hospital wing, before you end up even sicker." Rowan said, "I'll walk you." 

"Thanks, Rowan." 

* * *

"It  _ had  _ to be Merula. You know she is out to get you." 

Rowan said as Cyra lay back on the bed.

"Merula  _ usually _ either wants me expelled  _ or  _ wants me to make a bloody fool of myself. Not saying it wasn't her but this is juvenile, even for her."

Cyra retorted.

" _ That  _ would be more Ismelda or Barnaby. Then again, this is  _ Merula  _ we're talking about."

Rowan nodded, brow furrowing as they seemed to get deep in thought.

"The choir. Maybe  _ that  _ is why she did it?" 

Their reasoning received a groan from Cyra.

"I'm going to kill her. See if Tonks has any more of that prank soap….I am going to need it." 

_ If it is a war she wants its is a war she will get. _

  
  
  
  



	17. Between You and I

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Merula's walls breiifly shatter.

Cyra tried not to laugh when Merula showed up to rehearsals smelling like dung bombs, though it was difficult when the aforementioned girl leered over to her with a look she could only describe as a half-pout.

Merula knew and looked nearly as intimidating as a puppy at that moment and  _ that  _ was more amusing than Cyra wanted to admit.

"Okay, we'll take it from the top. Surely you all remember double trouble?" Flitwick said, earning a sigh.

_ Why did I let Penny and Tulip talk me into this again?  _ She wondered, as it had been three days already and outside of the little rivalry with Merula, Cyra had become rather bored with what she called singing trials.

That and the fact that Denis had hopped away twice already that evening.

"Looks like we'll finally see who the witch with the best voice is, Moores," Merula said, ignoring the fact that her clothing smelled very similar to a skunk that had also rolled in sulfur.

"May the best one win, Merula." Cyra retorted, rolling her eyes as Merula responded with:

"I will."

  
  


_ Merula wouldn't be quite so annoying if she deflated her ego even a bit. _

Cyra thought, watching as the other Slytherin practically pranced up onto the stage for her part of the audition and even Cyra had to admit that Merula could sing well.

It was interesting really, to hear such a voice come from someone who spoke so gruffly. How had Merula learned to sing so well? She most certainly sang better than Cyra thought she could herself, though, soon enough it was her turn and she found herself reciting the song from memory, though she thought she said one too many doubles and left out the eye of something or another as she sang.

And from Merula's cocky smirk, she  _ had. _

  
  
  


"You called that singing, Moores? That sounded more like a werewolf howling!" Merula said in a low voice as a Ravenclaw boy got up on stage.

"Shut it, Snyde." 

"At least I didn't mess up completely!"

Cyra really resisted the urge to strike her with a tongue tie jinx. 

_ Gods, why is she so annoying? _

She wondered though she didn't have time to worry about her mood swing of a housemate as Flitwit spoke up again.

"We had two spots left and it's been decided that those will be filled by Jude Avery and Cyra Moores."

Cyra felt herself jolt at her name being called.

Was Flitwick insane? Merula had done so much better than her.

When she looked over to where Merula had been standing she only got a glimpse of a devastated look as the other girl rushed out.

"Professor," the room went silent, "I think Merula earned it a lot more than I did. I know you are looking for certain voices but...I think Merula would be the best one." 

She could hear multiple people in the crowd gasp.

"Cyra, are you sure?" 

Penny asked earning a sigh.

"Yes, if it is all the same to you, professor."

* * *

_ Of course, everyone picks little miss perfect. Oh look at me, my brother ran away and I wanna find him! Give me everything because of some damn sob story. _

Merula thought as she pulled her knees up to her chest and buried her head into her arms.

_ Why does everyone else get everything and I get nothing? You'd think I would learn not to expect anything different. You would think….. _

"Merula?" 

Her blood froze at the sound of the oh too familiar voice. 

"What do you want Moores? Come to gloat?"

She demanded, earning a sigh.

"No, I didn't,..wait...have you been crying?" 

Merula thought to send a hex at the other girl but decided against it.

"So what if I have?" 

She heard Cyra sit down beside her on the grass.

"This is about more than a stupid competition isn't it?" 

Cyra pressed, earning a sigh.

  
  


"And why should I tell you? You have attacked me with a fanged frisbee, put a dung bomb in my clothing chest, frogspawn soap in my bath, and exploded a custard pastry in my face." 

Cyra just chuckled and rolled her eyes.

"Curse of the bogeys, tongue tie jinx, and you dyed my cat pink. Don't ever insult my cat like that." 

Merula couldn't help but grin at that response, though she remained silent for some time.

_ Cyra trusted me, I guess I can trust her. She didn't smart off when I told her about my parents in the common room. _

She thought before finally speaking: 

"You want to know why I wanted the part so badly? It's because of my mum. She used to sing in the frog choir and when I was little, she would sing to me  _ every  _ night she was home. I kind of promised her I would do my best to get in the choir like she was, and  _ now  _ that I won't ever see her again….I  **_wanted_ ** something to make me feel close to her in some way."

  
  


Merula was prepared to be ridiculed for this, to be judged for wanting her mum even after everything. Instead, Cyra just stood.

"I told Flitwick to give you my part. I just joined the competition to shut Penny and you up. Besides, you sound way better than I did." 

Merula felt heat crawl into her face at the compliment, though she couldn't help but look up.

"Really?" 

She nearly hexed herself for sounding so excited by the concept.

"Yeah. I even convinced Tulip to let you use Denis. Come on, let's head back inside because  _ you  _ have choir and  _ I  _ have a bunch of house elves to ask for leftovers."

  
  


Merula glanced down at Cyra's hand before nodding and accepting it.

"Alright but if you tell anyone about…" 

Cyra cut her off.

"Snyde, I may throw a fanged frisbee at your head  **_but_ ** I won't air out your vulnerabilities like that. It's not my style." 

  
  
  
  



	18. The Darkness inside

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everyone has a hard time.

"You know she is bragging about pulling one over on you right? You  _ know  _ how big of a….Prat...Merula can be!" 

Cyra tried to ignore Penny the following day at lunch, though that was nearly impossible with the blonde practically yelling in her ear.

"I honestly don't think she was lying last night but even if she wasn't, let her talk. Everyone has their secrets." 

Cyra responded, recalling how Merula had paused to fix her makeup before returning the previous evening.

_ No, she wasn't lying...She's full of it but she wasn't lying this time. _

"Yeah and some people's secrets can  _ kill _ too. Can't they?"

Penny retorted, getting up and storming off, leaving Cyra stunned.

"Bloody hell was that about?"

Cyra muttered, earning a shrug.

"No idea? Maybe Merula made a snide remark this morning to Penny or Tulip?" 

Cyra just sighed and turned her attention back toward her soup and bread.

"I know Merula is a pain but she deserved that seat far more than I did. Just trust me on that." 

  
  


"Even if she did turn Nyx pink?" 

"Don't even remind me, Rowan. I  _ should  _ turn  _ Merula _ pink for that one." Cyra retorted before adding: "want to go out onto the moor today after class? Promised Hagrid I'd check on the Thresal herd since they usually don't go that far away from the forests."

  
  


"Of course! Though I may be rubbish at anything Thresal related. Maybe you can tell me what they look like?" 

  
  
  


* * *

"I don't care! You lied to me, Karasu! I trusted you and you literally let your stupid pride lead you to stab me in the back!" 

Merula snapped, though she felt her eyes burn as she recalled what had happened earlier that month.

"I'll use your dumb frog in the choir but that doesn't mean we're friends. Even  **_I_ ** wouldn't stoop as low as you did." 

With that Merula walked away, only to stop when she heard Tulip say:

"I never meant for it to get back to your Aunt, Merula." 

It took the Slytherin every inch of self-control not to hex her.

"Yeah, well, it  **_did_ ** and all because your ambition blinded you! We were  _ friends _ or did you forget that little detail?" 

* * *

"How can you see them, anyway?" Rowan asked as they let Cyra put their hand on the invisible creature's neck.

"My grandpa died at home. He had some form of illness that magic couldn't cure, only slow." Cyra responded "they're only visible to those who have seen and understood death but they are quite gentle...though I think they are out this far because it was an easy hunting ground. You  **_may_ ** not want to look at the ground." 

  
  


Rowan thought Cyra looked ready to be sick and made sure they didn't look anywhere that Cyra was.

"What is it?" 

Cyra grimaced.

"Rabbits. evidently, there was a whole clutch of them. Perhaps more than one. Come on, let's go before I gag."

  
  


As they walked away from the scene, Rowan took note of how Cyra carried herself. How the girl's eyes seemed darker, how her face seemed slimmer.

She looked sick, nearly as sick as Chiara sometimes looked. 

"Cy, are you okay? I mean, you have been a bit off since everything and I hate to say it but this contest with Merula is the most alive I've seen you since last year." 

  
  


"I...was so focused on finding my brother that I lost my mind, Rowan. Now I just….I feel lost. My parents are never going to return to normal, my brother is dead, I just feel like I've lost everything Rowan." 

Rowan could hear the emotion breaking Cyra's voice and slipped their hand into her's.

"Hey, you have  _ me. _ You have your friends. You're not alone. We can deal with this together, but you're going to have to trust all us." 

Cyra's only response was to squeeze Rowan's hand.

"Thanks, Rowan. I don't know what I would do without you." 

* * *

Merula really didn't want to deal with people at the moment. Not her idiot group of friends, not any of the annoying idiots, and not whatever the hell Cyra was to her.

No, she really just wanted to punch something—preferably Tulip—and be done with it but she didn't want to get detention again.

Not when she actually had something she enjoyed doing after classes.

She thought back to the conversations that she and Tulip had in the past, the way the other girl had seemed to be a loyal friend up until this stupid cursed vault business.

Even Merula wouldn't open her mouth about something like  _ that.  _ Not unless she  _ really  _ hated them and wanted to turn their whole family against them anyway.

She was already called a death eater, wasn't that enough?

  
  
  



	19. The Snake Strikes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cyra's hands is tied and she raises her wand at a friend for the first time.

"she's a monster or do you believe all that rabble about them being good too?" 

Cyra felt her blood boil at those words and tightened her grip on the broom.

"Chiara is my friend, Haywood. She may have her...Issue...But you can't tell me the girl who is constantly helping people is a monster." 

Penny's eyes narrowed at this before she bit out with more venom than Cyra had ever heard her speak with

"If you keep being friends with her then we can no longer be friends, Moores." 

Cyra felt her breath hitch but she closed her eyes and refused to back down.

"I value our friendship, Penny but I am not just going to end the one I have with Chiara because you order me to." 

She had promised to keep Chiara's secret and knew the girl's fears about what the backlash of her condition would be.

"She's dangerous! Even with wolfsbane, werewolves are completely savage! We should tell the…" 

Cyra didn't give Penny time to finish as she pulled her wand.

"I'm sorry, Penny but I am  **_not_ ** letting you ruin her life." She said "Obliviate!"

  
  


Cyra was trembling as she watched as the blonde blinked in surprise.

"Cyra? What's going on? Why are we out in the training grounds? I thought we were going to study in the library today?" 

Cyra felt herself relax at those words, she had managed to wipe that morning from her friend's mind.

"I figured we could study out here so we could use the training targets to actually practice the spells." She lied easily, though her stomach gripped with the words. "But I promised Skye I would practice my speed...Think we can save studying for this evening?" 

  
  


\------

Cyra wasn't even aware that someone was on the pitch, her mind in a whirl. She had done something she swore she would never do, she had raised her wand to a friend. 

She had  _ attacked  _ a friend. Had wiped a friend's memory. She had good reasoning, sure, but that didn't change anything. 

"Merlin's beard, you're uptight. What did pigtails do? Steal your spotlight?" 

Cyra very nearly fell off her broom at the sudden voice. 

"What the hell do you want, Snyde?" 

Cyra winched at her own tone, though at least Merula wasn't a friend.

"Hey, don't take your pathetic sense of regret out at me! I just asked what little miss popular did that caused you to obliviate her. " 

"Get stuffed Snyde. Don't you have something  _ better  _ to do than annoy me? Like, I don't know...torturing a Cruppy?" 

Cyra forced her broom forward, she did not want to deal with whatever it was that Merula was playing at. She was not going to deal with the snide Slytherin's usual melodrama. She had enough on her mind without the added desire to hex her housemate into the middle of next week. 

\------

By the time she returned to the castle, Cyra was still lost in thought but still angry about everything that had transpired that morning. 

_ I have to find Chiara and see if she's okay. I was too angry to deal with anything earlier. _

She thought, though as soon as she landed Rowan came to meet her.

"You stood Penny up with a lie only she would believe. Did something happen?" 

Cyra cursed under her breath and sighed.

"Remember me sneaking food out of the great hall for that  _ secret _ I couldn't tell you? Let's just say it was to do with  _ that secret  _ and Penny."

She was afraid that Rowan would ask her about the secret and that she would have to lie to her best friend, but to her relief, they just nodded.

"Just don't let that secret come between you and our trip to Hogsmeade. We've been planning  **_that_ ** since the train." 

Cyra allowed herself to relax.

"Yeah, if I don't end up in detention for the whole year for casting the hurling hex on Merula." 

  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I just realized that Skye is supposed to be the same age as the main cast (besides bill) so that changes a bit of the planned plot.
> 
> Also debating on including some stuff so feel free to give me your input either on here or on Tumblr.


	20. Closer

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cyra is emotional and she finds help in an unlikely sorce

Cyra found herself in the courtyard though it was about an hour till curfew. She hadn't been able to so much as  _ look  _ at Penny during dinner and had opted to sit with Skye Parkin and discuss broom types instead of sitting with her closest friends.

  
  


_ Why do I feel like rubbish? She was the one being a prat about it and had basically threatened to tell people about Chiara's condition! I promised Lupin I would stick by Chiara and…. _

She mentally told herself, only to be jolted from her thoughts by a familiar voice.

"So this is where you hid. Everyone was wondering." 

Cyra didn't bother to look to the speaker, knowing who it was by voice alone.

"I guess I shouldn't be surprised they are looking for me. Though kinda glad you were the one to find me, Tonks."

She responded as the metamorphmagus took a seat beside her. 

"Yeah? Why is that?"

Cyra sighed as she leaned back against the statue in the quiet courtyard, closing her eyes. She knew Tonks was trustworthy, but it didn't stop her heart from leaping into her throat.

"Because I know you're level headed but will tell me  **_exactly_ ** what you think and I did something today I swore I would never do."

  
  


She could tell by the way the Hufflepuff's brow furrowed that she had caught her attention.

"Blimey mate, you make it sound like you crucioed someone."

  
  


_ I may as wells have. _

Cyra thought as she tried to work out a way to say this without fully disclosing Chiara's secret.

  
  


"If you had to draw a wand on a friend to protect someone you care about, would you?" 

She eventually asked, earning a sound from the other girl exhaling.

"Depends. What happened, Cyra?" 

Cyra drew her knees to her chest in hopes that it would help with the emotions she felt.

"I cast the memory charm on Penny. I can't tell you the reasoning only that I had no real choice and I hate myself for it in spite of that." 

  
  


The courtyard was quiet for some time before Tonks spoke again.

"You said you were protecting someone? From what? Penny would never hurt anyone." 

She could see the conflict on the shapeshifter's face and knew that she had to tell somewhat of the whole truth.

"A rumor. A rumor that could very well end this person's time at Hogwarts and ruin their life. I wish I could tell you every detail but I can't. I am  **_not_ ** an oath breaker." 

She answered, earning a look.

"Did you try to talk to her?" 

There was no accusation in the pink-haired girl's tone, just confusion. 

Of course, there was confusion. Without knowledge of the literal wolf in sheep's clothing, it just sounded ridiculous.

"Yes, but she was practically hysterical. I was afraid she would say something before she could be convinced to see reason. I  _ had  _ to protect her, Tonks. I  _ promised  _ I would watch out for her. I know I'm a terrible person for it but..." 

Cyra was surprised by the way her voice shook as she said this. How she was showing such emotion in front of the pink-haired girl.

They hadn't really got to know each other until this year, after all.

  
  


"Okay, I have no idea who this girl you are protecting could be or why she needs it but if you felt strongly enough to something that has gutted you this badly, I don't think you are horrible for doing it." 

Tonks responded carefully after a few minutes of silent contemplation.

"Look at it like this, even Aurors used the unforgivables during the war. That was for the best interest of  _ everyone  _ and it doesn't make them horrible people. A memory charm isn't nearly as bad, especially if it was to protect someone."

* * *

  
  


Tonks wasn't sure how to take the Slytherin, who was practically trembling with emotion by this point. She had never seen Cyra like this and she doubted even Rowan would know what to do.

"I just feel terrible. Penny is my friend but so is….the other person. I hate choosing between them like this but I  _ had  _ to."

Cyra continued, prompting Tonks to put a hand on her shoulder.

"Hey, it was just a memory charm mate. Take a breath, yeah? You didn't hurt her. She's fine and you said it yourself, you tried to reason with her." 

  
  


She tried, just as she noticed someone else walking toward them. She was instantly on edge since she couldn't tell who it was at first.

What if it was Penny? Cyra was already a wreck without that added guilt.

"What happened? Is she okay?" 

The figure said, causing Tonks to relax as the person drew closer and revealed themself to be none other than Rowan.

"She's driving herself mental with guilt if anything. Do you know any more about this than she's told me?"

Rowan sighed and shook her head.

"No, and I've only seen her like this  _ once  _ after the ice vault landed me in the hospital wing. Why don't we move this to one of the clubrooms so we can talk privately? Besides, it's a full moon tonight and who knows what may be about." 

  
  
  


* * *

"Oathbreaker?" 

Rowan repeated the word slowly as she regarded Tonks, trying to place together why her friend would use such an archaic term that had been much more common in pureblood families.

Unless Cyra  _ was  _ a pureblood or at least had roots in what had been considered a barely tainted family-line.

"Yep. That is what she said. That she wasn't an oathbreaker. Wonder who she is protecting though? I  _ know  _ its a girl but nothing else." 

Rowan glanced toward the doorway of the great hall, thankful that Cyra had not returned from the hospital wing yet.

"I don't know but despite how rash and distant she can be, Cyra is a pretty loyal person. It had to be something major for her to cast the spell. I mean, she is annoyed by Ben half the time and she still defends him when some of the other Slytherin bully him." 

Rowan said, brow furrowing as they tried to think of a reason for all of this.

"When I told her about not identifying as my assigned at birth gender, she instantly agreed to keep it a secret until  **_I_ ** told people. She definitely has her flaws but she is loyal where it counts." 

Tonks nodded before sighing.

"I just wish I knew how to help her besides forcing her to get Madame Pomfrey to give her calming drought." 

  
  


"I think we should keep an eye on her for a few days. Who knows what crazy stunts she will try to pull off because of this. At least all the nonsense with the vaults is over." 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So originally this was going to be a Cyra and Chiara chapter but Tonks basically popped up and this chapter wrote itself.


	21. Unlikely

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cyra starts her search for a way to help Chiara and starts to make allies in unlikely places.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Cannon werewolf self—sabotage self-inflicted wounds.

Cyra knew she shouldn't basically leave her friends waiting but as she headed outside, she welcomed the crisp night air on her face which gave her _something_ besides guilt to feel.

Turning her face toward the full moon, she thought of Chiara. What had Penny said to her? How had Penny found out about her condition? How had Chiara reacted? Was she in the forbidden forest now? Was she doing alright? Had she taken her potion?

If only there was some way for her to safely be able to enter the forest and check up on her. 

_Maybe I can research werewolves? Maybe there is a way for me to be sure she is alright…Lupin did say he had friends that stayed with him._

She thought, closing her eyes as she heard a distant, loud but mournful sound echoing from the forest.

_I have to figure out what they did._ No one deserves to be alone.

With that, she headed back inside the castle. Determined to figure out a way to do _something_. 

  
  


* * *

The following day felt like it had inched by and as soon as she got the chance, she headed to the owlery with a handful of gold and a piece of parchment that simply read:

_One copy of the third year Defense against the dark arts and whatever magizology book you have that contains creatures in the xxxxx category._

Tying the parchment and pouch of gold onto the leg of a small, grey screech owl Cyra paused to sigh.

"Flourish and blots Motty. Try to not get sidetracked, yeah? I'm trying to help a friend." 

The owl cooed once before taking flight, leaving Cyra alone in the tower.

The weather was murky, that much Cyra was grateful for as she walked toward Hagrid's hut, only to be intercepted by a bolt of grey and white fur crashing into her ankles and nearly toppling her over.

"Merlin's pants! Borf, what the hell?" She yelped in surprise, only to earn a yip and a growl from the cub who's erratic body language made it seem like he wanted her to follow him.

"Alright, alright. I'm coming." 

She was only mildly surprised when she found a rather sickly looking Chiara sitting beneath a tree near the dark forest, wrapped in a cloak and trembling as blood seeped from her torn pants leg.

"Bloody fuck, what happened to you?"

Cyra thought, winching as she saw the evident signs of teeth marks on the pale flesh.

Borf barked as if trying to respond, though Chiara only managed a response.

"Last night was the full moon." 

She sounded tired, weak even and Cyra could only imagine why.

"Yes and that explains why your leg is ripped to ribbons?" 

Chiara blanched at that and Cyra figured she would have been sick.

"I'm a monster, Cyra. When a werewolf is deprived of human flesh….they will turn on themselves. I forgot to take yesterday's dose." 

Cyra swore under her breath, closing her eyes. She _did_ remember what Chiara had said about the wounds being cursed.

"We need to get you to Madame Pomfrey. Think you can stand?" Cyra asked, muttering the incantation _ferula_ under her breath and earning a yelp from the Hufflepuff. 

"Sorry. I just needed to stop the bleeding." She said, taking note of how the other girl flinched when she reached a hand out to help her up.

"You should just go. Penny is right. I'll just end up hurting someone...Or worse. I should have never let my parents and Dumbledor talk me into coming here." 

The way Chiara's voice broke snapped something inside Cyra and every ounce of the anger she had felt toward Penny's outburst the previous day came flooding back.

"I am **_not_ **leaving and what does Penny really know about you? Yes, you're a werewolf…" 

Chiara cut her off, voice crackling with emotion.

"A werewolf, Cyra! Don't you get it? I can't control it and once a month, I turn into a bloodthirsty beast that would stop at **_nothing_ ** to kill **_any person that crosses it_ **! If it wasn't for Snape and the wolfsbane potion everyone would be at risk because of me!" 

  
  


Chiara broke then and Cyra had to wonder if it was Penny's words alone or the stress of everything that had happened that caused the reaction.

Another thing that Cyra realized is that she **_hated_ **seeing the platinum-haired girl cry.

"Look, I don't give a frilly damn rather you can control it or not! It's one day a month! That doesn't bloody change who you are! You do **_everything_ **in your power to keep everyone safe." 

Cyra was nearly shouting at this point.

"You didn't choose this, Chiara. You're a victim of this and **_that_ **doesn't make you a monster. How you deal with it proves that." 

With that Cyra put a hand on the girl's shoulder, unaware of the hawk that was watching them.

  
  


* * *

  
  


Merula wasn't sure what was going on when Cyra just walked over and grabbed her by the hood, forcing her off the wall she had been sitting on.

"Bloody hell, Moores! What do you want?" She demanded, managing to twist away though she dropped her sketchbook in the process. 

"Duel me….and **_don't_ **hold back." 

The request was hissed, furious even and for a moment Merula couldn't help but wonder where this change of attitude had come from. 

"Fine but if you land me in detention…" she began, only to earn a smirk.

"Way ahead of you, Snyde. I know a place we can duel and not get caught."

  
  
  


To say that she felt like an idiot for following Cyra Moores anywhere was an understatement, however, when she was eventually lead through a tapestry on the seventh floor and into a strange room filled with training equipment, she instantly relaxed.

"We'll have privacy here...Rowan's love for books and history comes in handy sometimes," Cyra stated and Merula would never admit it but for once she agreed.

"Is this duel about little miss sunshine?" She asked, glancing around the room. Taking note of several books on the shelves and the death eater replicas.

"What is this place anyway?"

"The room of requirement. Anything that can be conjured can be found here." Cyra responded before pulling a scroll off a shelf, brow arching as she pulled a bottle of fire whiskey from the shelf.

"And looks like someone has been hiding illegal contraband in here."

  
  


"And practicing potions making. What even _is_ this supposed to be?" 

Merula retorted, picking up a bottle with what looked like purple goo congealed inside of it.

"Why did you want to duel me anyway? I thought you hated fighting?" 

She added, unable to not be curious about the other girl's reasoning.

"It is either this or flatten Penny for something she doesn't remember and like it or not **_you_ ** are one of the best duelists here...topped only by Diego but _he_ is a pain." 

It was weird hearing Cyra compliment her (now for the second time) though things seemed _different_ this year. Since _when_ did Cyra doubt her friends? Since _when_ did Cyra _want_ to fight?

"Are you sure you didn't land on your head during flying class?" 

Merula retorted, earning a sigh.

"Just duel me arsehole." 

* * *

By the time they were done, Cyra had several burns and Merula _knew_ that she would have bruises. Yet there was a kind of calm between them, a strange sort of silence that surprisingly wasn't awkward.

"Okay, that makes round three and I don't want to go to Azkaban for murder," Merula said with a sigh, flopping down unceremoniously on a dusty, overstuffed but legless chair.

She commented, earning a sigh from Cyra who nodded.

"Thanks for doing this. I evidently inherited my father's temper and the last thing my mother needs right now is an owl saying I muggle punched a student." 

She said after a while, earning a surprised look

"Okay, I am not going to lie and tell you I didn't hear some of the exchange between you and blondie. So why did you oblivate her? She was trying to manipulate you into choosing between her and whoever. You could have just walked away." 

Merula couldn't believe that she was saying this but she had never seen her rival (who she assumed was goody-two-shoes) be so harsh or turn on a friend.

"Because she was going to ruin someone's life, Snyde. Because no one deserves to be judged for something out of their control." 

  
  


Merula felt her stomach twist at those words and felt the familiar anger once again boil up.

"Isn't that **exactly** what _you_ did to me for the last two years? Bringing up my parents? Sneering at me because of what they did? What makes that any different?" 

She said after a while, causing the room to grow quiet.

"I know and I'm sorry. It wasn't fair even if you do drive me crazy." 

Cyra said after several minutes. 

"You _aren't_ your parents. No more, than I am mine. No wonder you gave me such a hard time...I didn't make it easy on you either." 

  
  


_No, you didn't._

Merula thought as she regarded her housemate for several moments. 

"And maybe _I_ shouldn't have made those jokes about Jacob." She said before sighing and adding "look, we're not friends or anything _but_ thanks." 

It felt weird to say those words to anyone, least of all Cyra Moores. The _icon_ of their age.

An icon that seemed as full of mystery as the vaults surrounding the school. 

"And...If you need to let off some stress or something...I'll duel you _or_ whatever." 

"Thanks, Snyde. This _doesn't_ mean I'll take it easy on you in class though." 

Cyra retorted and Merula felt herself grin.

"Thank heavens for that. I don't need you going soft on me, Moores." 

* * *

They sat in silence for some time before Merula spoke again.

"So Haywood was trying to tell you who you couldn't be friends with because she didn't approve? Bloody hell, Moores. You have the right to choose your own friends. Even if they _are_ weird." 

Cyra tried not to be offended by this comment though she couldn't help but quip back:

"Need I remind you that Ismelda is the definition of weird?" 

Merula snorted at that.

"That is an understatement. You don't share a dorm with her."

  
  
  
  
  


* * *

"Please tell me you and Merula didn't get yourselves in detention…Again." 

Liz commented as soon as Cyra walked into their dorm, finding Nyx laying on the bed near the other girl. 

"No. Is it _that_ big of a deal that we decided to study together? She's ace at potions and I exploded my cauldron last week." 

Cyra retorted, the half-lie coming far too easy for her though she couldn't tell the creature lover the truth.

Not that she would believe her anyway.

"Merula _is_ better than Snape, I suppose." 


	22. Secrets

The next morning three owls landed nearly in Cyra's plate, two carrying parcels marked with the Flourish and Blotts logo and the other the family owl, Flint.

"Great...What does Mum want this time?" She muttered, relieving the larger owls of their packages before turning her attention to the letter.

  
  
  


Cyra,

I am writing to let you know that I am going to America for the duration of the winter in order to get away from this whole situation at home. I know you found out about Jacob and I wish that I could explain everything but words are failing me. Just understand that your father is not who I thought he was and what he does has no reflection upon either you or Jacob. He has made his own choices and must deal with the consequences. 

Please be careful with those vaults and anything else you do at Hogwarts. I am so glad that you are making friends outside of that house of yours. Still do not understand how you were not Gryffindor or Hufflepuff.

See you soon,

Mum.

Cyra furrowed her brow as she scanned over the letter, not even noticing that Rowan was reading over her shoulder.

"Maybe you can come to the farm and spend Christmas?" They suggested, earning a sigh.

"Yeah, maybe. I wonder what she meant about my father?" Cyra responded, ignoring the last part of the letter.

"What? Did Mummy decide you were too pathetic to come home for Christmas?" 

Cyra glanced toward the professor's table before wordlessly aiming her wand at Merula, the spell causing her porage to erupt into her face. 

"Well,  _ that's  _ one way to shut her up." Rowan retorted, earning a smirk.

"I'm going to go write back to her before charms class and I want to take some of these cream rolls to Chiara. After that Grindylow made a royal mess of her leg, pretty sure Madame Pomfrey is keeping her at least for a day or so." Cyra said, more bothered by the tidbit about her father and the insult to Slytherin more than she was about staying at Hogwarts for the winter break.

"Okay, remember we promised Hagrid to help him de-gnome his garden after classes today."

"I know Row, I won't forget." 

Cyra said, making a bundle of pastries in a napkin and sticking it in her pocket before leaving with her books.

She returned to her dorm first, stashing the books and quickly scrawling out a letter.

Mum,

Don't worry about where I'll stay for the holiday. Rowan has invited me to spend it with their family. As for the Slytherins….I  **_do_ ** have friends in my house. Not all of them are future dark lords or whatever have you. Liz Tuttle, one of my dorm mates likes creatures more than people...and snuck a Niffler into our rooms last year. 

You can imagine how that went.

What did you mean about Dad? Is he having another mid-life crisis? 

Tell Great Aunt Martha I said hello.

Love, 

Cyra

  
  


Once she was done she pocketed it to send after class before she headed back toward the hospital wing.

  
  


* * *

Chiara was surprised to see Cyra that morning, least of all when she sat down on the bed near her feet and handed her a bundle of something that smelled sweet.

"How are you feeling this morning?" 

She asked, earning a sigh.

"Like I was mauled by a werewolf." Chiara retorted "thanks by the way. For not giving up on me….I had a little birdy tell me about what happened. Are you okay?"

Cyra let out a humorless snort at the comment.

"Your leg got ripped ribbons and you're worried about  _ my  _ friendship problems. I know I'm not the best friend to anyone  _ but  _ I'll be damned if I let anyone hurt you."

Chiara wasn't sure  _ how  _ to react to that. How was it that not one but two people knew of her condition and had accepted it? 

"I don't want to come between you and your friends." 

She began, only to earn a look that Chiara couldn't quite read.

"Someone told me something that really should have been common sense: I can choose my own friends and if someone has their head up their bum, that is on them." 

Chiara wanted to ask more about everything that had happened the previous day but before she could, Talbott's voice interrupted them.

"Thought you said she would avoid you?" 

Cyra arched a brow though she didn't ask.

"Cyra Moores, meet Talbott Winger. The only other student that knows about my health issues." 

Chiara said, calling the attention to the boy in Ravenclaw robes. 

"I know who you are." Talbott said "Chiara, do you really think I can trust her?"

Chiara nodded and closed her eyes.

"I do." 

  
  
  



	23. Lull

"We'll wait till after the next Hogsmeade trip because you should enjoy that before you decide." 

Cyra nodded as she watched Motty fly off with the letter home.

_ Home  _

That was such a strange idea now. It had stopped being home the previous summer.

"Does it hurt?" 

She asked, trying to distract herself from  _ that  _ unpleasant thought.

"No. It's strange but it doesn't hurt. Then again I  _ shrink _ I don't grow." 

Cyra was about to ask what Talbott had meant by that when they heard voices approaching.

"Looks like we'll need to meet later. Thanks again for this." 

Talbott nodded then in what seemed to be an instant later, a large bird stood in his place then took flight.

* * *

  
  


"Be glad you don't have Merula in History of magic this year. She was being a complete troll today. You don't want to know what she did to poor Ben!" 

Cyra snickered at the metaphor and glanced up from where she was filling in Gnome holes.

"You can say bitch you know." 

She quipped As she worked

"You know swearing makes you sound inarticulate right?" 

Rowan retorted, only to earn an eye roll. 

"Pretty sure I don't  **_want_ ** to be articulate when talking about Merula being a royal cow." 

Cyra retorted, ignoring that Rowan had sent her a look.

"What's up with you two? One day you are defending her the next you are insulting her." 

Cyra just smirked up at them.

"I defend her whenever it's  _ right  _ to do so. When she's being an arsehole to people I'm calling her on it."

  
  


"Both of you are confusing. Is that a Slytherin thing or something?" 

  
  


"More like an involving Merula thing. You get used to it when you practically live with her." 

  
  


They worked in silence for some time before Rowan spoke again.

"What your mum said about you being Slytherin…What did she mean by that?" 

They asked, earning a sigh from Cyra who paused.

"My mother has all these  _ ideas  _ about what  _ should  _ and  _ shouldn't  _ be. Just add being Slytherin in the same category as broomsticks, quidditch, and care for magical creatures." 

The answer held hints of bitterness.

"You literally are the Slytherin chaser, you fly every chance you get, and the one class you enjoy most is COMC." Rowan noted, earning a smirk that honestly would have been worrying if it was from anyone other than her best friend.

"Guess Mummy doesn't always get what she wants, eh?" Cyra retorted, pausing to glance up at where the gnomes had trotted off before adding "my dad's family is a long line of Slytherin, and honestly, most of them have questionable views. She is just too damn paranoid."

  
  


Rowan wanted to ask more but couldn't bring themself to pry into their best friend's home life.

"Though I wonder what she meant in her letter." 

Cyra said after a while, finishing filling the last hole. 

"Hey, I have some time to kill since they canceled practice while looking for a new seeker since Rath decided to flatten ours. Want to hang out? We've been pretty busy." 

Rowan couldn't help but be shocked by the request, even if Cyra had been their closest confidant. After all, Cyra seemed to have more friends that had much more interesting lives.

"Of course!"

  
  
  
  
  
  



	24. The Raven And The Werewolf part 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A month timeskip from the last chapter
> 
> Tonks, Cyra, and Tulip makes plans for a Halloween prank. While Merula and her ragtag crew makes plans of their own.

"When are we going to actually open this thing? We're pretty sure we know where it is." 

Ismelda said, earning a sigh from Merula for at least the third time that night. 

"Because we need to be prepared for anything. We don't know what's in the vault and the last thing we need is to be remembered as  _ casualties _ of the vaults." 

She replied, keeping her voice low since in spite of the irritation she felt.

"The first had cursed ice. Who is to say this won't have a dragon or who knows what else guarding it." 

She continued, scribbling something in her notebook.

"Werewolves? Do you really believe that there is a chance we'll fight werewolves? Aren't they just human that turn into a wolf?" 

Ismelda pointed out, earning a glare.

"Look, Moores has all these scrolls and notes on werewolves and I don't believe for one moment she has actually given up on finding the vaults."

  
  


Merula responded, earning a look from Barnaby.

"Maybe she just likes werewolves or she **_is_** a werewolf."

Merula arched a brow at that.

"Really? I'm pretty sure I would notice if Moores went missing once a month." 

She retorted, earning a scoff from Ismelda.

"Yeah because you are obsessed with her." 

Merula felt heat climb into her face at that before she managed to school her features.

"Says the person who writes ' _ romantic'  _ poetry in her diary."

She retorted, thankful that the revelation was enough to both cause Ismelda to turn beet red _and_ effectively shut her up.

Even if she did have a point about the werewolves, but then why was Cyra studying werewolves? 

It didn't seem likely that Cyra  _ was  _ a werewolf, though she did seem comfortable in the dark forest however  _ that  _ was probably just a Cyra Moores thing and not a werewolf thing. 

"We'll open the vault tonight. Everyone will be distracted by the Halloween feast. We'll have to be careful of Filch and Mrs. Norris though."

She said after a while, sighing and closing the book she had been reading before she glanced over at the far back table, seeing her self proclaimed rival sitting with her ex-best friend and the Metamorpmagus Hufflepuff.

Could  _ they  _ be Moores' new curse-breaking team? 

* * *

"Oh come on mate! It'll be fun! Besides, your ability will make it even funnier!" 

Cyra glared over her tray of Corned beef sandwiches before she sighed and deflated.

"Fine. Just  _ don't  _ expect me to drop any dung bombs onto Snape. I don't want detention with him again and I have the feeling he would Ava Kadava me in bird form." 

Cyra retorted, causing Tonks to nearly snort her goblet of pumpkin juice.

"Or he may turn into a great bat and suck your blood!" Tulip retorted, a coy grin spreading over her face.

Cyra snickered at this and rolled her eyes.

"Okay if we're going to pull this on madam pinch we're going to need a real plan so we don't end up in detention in the library for a month." 

They were quiet for several minutes before Tonks spoke up again.

"How about  _ this.  _ We put the trap  _ on  _ her desk so tomorrow when she opens her desk to get her files out it'll erupt. We'll be sure to actually move the records she keeps there so we won't do any  _ real  _ damage." 

  
  


Cyra nodded then glanced across the room to where Chiara was practically slumped over, half-asleep from the transformation three days prior.

  
  


"Hey, since it's Halloween and a weekend. Why don't we send someone to convince Dumbledore to let us have an inner club sleepover in one of the clubrooms? We can get Bill and a few other Prefects to chaperone or even the house ghosts. The Bloody Baron  _ definitely  _ wouldn't let anything uncouth happen." 

She suggests, earning a grin.

"Yes, or we use the room of requirement by passing the teachers and still having some fun." 

Tonks said, earning a confused look from Tulip.

"How is a room going to help us?"

Cyra just grinned, sharing a look with Tonks.

"You'll see." 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Originally this chapter was going to show Cyra's first animagus transformation but I decided to leave that vague for right now.
> 
> Part two of this chapter will be up sometime tonight as well.


	25. The Raven And The Werewolf part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rowan reveals something to Skye about Cyra and Cyra struggles with identity.
> 
> Also, Talbott is a good friend.

"This was the most brilliant plan you have had yet, Tonks," Cyra said as she unloaded the foods they had managed to convince the house elves to give them.

"Penny and Tulip are out inviting people. I think Chiara has agreed to come. Are you inviting anyone?" 

Tonks asked, levitating food onto a table that she had repaired only a few minutes prior.

"I'm debating on inviting some from Slytherin. I mean most of us never get invited to the inner house things. Sure, Merula can be a brat and Ismelda is….In need of help mentally. But not every Slytherin is a headcase."

Cyra said, earning a snicker from Tonks.

"Really? Then what is your excuse?" 

That earned the Hufflepuff a shove into the pile of cushions that had appeared from thin air.

"Shut up, Nymphadora." 

That earned her a cushion to the face as the other girl's hair darkened slightly.

"Call me that again and I'll do worse than put frogspawn soap in your bath!"

  
  


"As long as you don't enchant my quill to hide from me, I'm fine. One of the first years did that last month and I swear McGonagall wanted to transfigure  _ me _ into a teacup." 

Cyra retorted, ignoring her friend's irritation though Tonks did smirk at that.

"Haha, well deserved. But no, I would definitely do something  _ humiliating  _ not something that would land you in detention." 

  
  


Tonks retorted as she stood, smirking as if thinking of the perfect payback.

"Well  _ that  _ I thank you for because if Anne what's-her-dumb-name pulls one more stunt on me like the hiding quill I will personally submerge her headfirst into the black lake."

  
  


Tonks just laughed and shook her head at that as she returned her attention back to preparations.

"Cyra, you are as intimidating as a Niffler. Now if you had mentioned pushing Merula into the lake I could believe it but a firsty? Really? No way would you pick on a kid."

Cyra snorted at that as she moved to help.

"I'd be more likely to hit Merula in the face with a quaffle. She made the quidditch team last month and by Merlin's beard she is annoying." 

  
  


Tonks let out a whistle at that.

"What position?" 

"Seeker, by some sort of massive dumb luck. Plus she's a bloody daredevil. Probably will get someone killed because of that fat head of hers." 

* * *

"You three are idiots." 

Chiara commented when Cyra, Tonks, and Tulip nearly tumbled into the room long after the sleepover had begun.

"I couldn't have said it better myself." Rowan retorted, hiding a grin of amusement behind a bottle of pumpkin juice and ignoring the look they got from Cyra.

"Hey, there is nothing wrong with having a little fun once in a while." Cyra retorted, snagging a creampuff off Rowan's plate.

"How did you all manage to do all this?" Cyra asked, earning a grin from a boy wearing a yellow jacket that she didn't recognize.

"Name's Jae. Jae Kim at your service. Chiara invited me and  _ I  _ have my ways." He retorted, earning a scoff from Chiara.

"He asked the house-elves." 

She retorted, snickering as he gave her a nudge.

"Hey don't tell all my secrets now!" 

Cyra laughed at their banter before settling on the floor beside Rowan.

"You know I am still surprised Felix came. I mean...he is usually all stoic and whatnot." Rowan commented, earning a smirk.

"Hey, he is here under the disguise of a  _ chaperone _ . I think he just wanted an excuse to talk to Charlie about dragons." Cyra retorted just as someone came over behind her, tapping her in the shoulder.

"Hey, ready for the match Saturday?"

Cyra nearly jumped at the touch though relaxed rather quickly as Skye Parkin took a seat beside her, handing her a bottle of butterbeer.

"Yeah. I just hope Merula is. This is only her third match and she isn't used to the rough tactics of Gryffindor." Cyra retorted, taking a gulp of her drink before sighing

"I just  _ really  _ hope she doesn't plant herself into one of the observation towers." 

Skye laughed at that, rolling her eyes.

"I saw her arguing with two of your teammates during the friendly the other day. How on earth did she make Seeker?" 

Rowan chose that moment to speak up

"Because she is a bleeding con artist." 

Cyra snickered at that.

"She can be but she does have one of the best brooms out there and  _ is  _ pretty fast. If her ego would deflate she would make a decent player." 

She retorted, taking another drink.

"Maybe I should hex her broom." Skye snickered, earning a smirk.

"You know what, teach me that spell and  _ I'll  _ do it at the next practice. There is only so much of ' _ my parents were the best quidditch players Slytherin has seen _ ' I can stand in one day." 

Cyra retorted, earning a scoff.

"Her parents were death eaters, right? It's no wonder she is so horrible to everyone." 

Skye retorted, not noticing Cyra freeze up.

"Nearly everyone in Slytherin had family that was death eaters. I don't think it's fair to compare her to them. She can be horrible not really to the point of torture." 

* * *

Skye noticed the edge in Cyra's tone and for a split second wondered if it was possible for the Slytherin to  _ like  _ Merula, however, something about how Rowan took Cyra's hand told her it was more than that.

_ Had Cyra had family on that side of the war? Shit...She hadn't thought of that!  _

"I guess you're right. Sorry." 

She said, earning a shrug.

"Just the way things are. I'll be the first to call Merula out on her bullshit but only because of what she does.  _ Not  _ what her parents did."

With that, Cyra stood and headed over to the snack table, leaving Skye sitting with Rowan.

"What was that about?"

She asked, earning a sigh from Rowan.

"Her father and a few former death eaters were rounded up conspiring to cause havoc….I don't think many people know about it because Moore is her mother's maiden name since the Felten's wanted nothing to do with the family after Anguis refused to fight in the first war." 

Skye felt her eyes widen at that.

"Felten? Merlin's pants! I right blundered that one." Skye said, slumping slightly.

"Hey, she didn't take it personally. I think the only people who know besides the staff are Chiara, Tonks, Talbott, Felix, and I." Rowan said with a sympathetic smile "the Felten's were not a part of the pure twenty-eight but they held severe supremacist views."

* * *

Cyra knew it was stupid, that she was stupid for being so offended but it did. She was  **_not_ ** a supremacist just because her father had been. 

She was  **_not_ ** one who would fall to the draw of dark magic. No, no matter what she would never turn to the dark arts.

With a sigh, she slipped from the room and transformed into her animagus form before taking flight, in need of fresh air.

Sometimes she was grateful to be able to turn into a bird, especially as it meant flying was possible. Sticking low to the ground she tried to distract herself with the feel of the wind in her feathers.

She was not surprised when a golden eagle came seemingly out of nowhere to join her. 

Eventually, they landed near the far side of the great lake, near the forbidden forest.

"You seem worried."

Talbott said as soon as they were human once again.

"Do you think I am capable of becoming a dark witch?" 

She asked, earning a sigh from the boy.

"Honestly, I don't. You treat everyone the same and you held a mandrake leaf in your mouth for a month just to be able to make a Chiara's transformation more bearable." 

Talbott's answer caused her to relax.

"What if I go the way of Sirius Black? He betrayed his best friends and killed one." She stammered, earning a scoff.

"Black was a mad man. The  **_whole_ ** black family is known to be, I mean they see themselves as superior because of blood supremacy but after so long all purebloods would be related in some way and that is literally  **_asking_ ** for mental problems." 

Talbott retorted

"And  **_you_ ** aren't mad. Even if sometimes your judgment is off."

  
  


Cyra turned to him then.

"What does that mean?"

She said, earning a chuckle.

"Let's just say things happen right in front of you that you don't see." 

  
  



	26. Blurred edges

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rowan and Cyra have a fight....
> 
> And Cyra is a dumbass....and gets progressively dumber by the chapter.

"You told her!" 

Cyra struggled to contain her temper as she met with Rowan the next day in Hogsmeade. 

"I'm sorry, I just didn't see any other way to get out of that conversation, you know what Skye is like!"

Rowan retorted, backing up as Cyra glared at her. She had only seen the girl this angry once and Merula had ended up being knocked several meters back by a hex aimed at her stomach.

"I can't believe you! If this gets out...Damn it all Rowan…" Cyra paused, running a hand through her hair before cursing low and harsh under her breath.

"Cyra  _ Felten _ . You may as wells have said I was a bloody death eater!" 

She erupted after several minutes, not noticing the way that Rowan's expression crumpled.

"I'm sorry okay? I messed up! I get that but I….I didn't." 

Cyra cut them off once more.

"Merlin, Rowan.  **_I know!_ ** " 

Cyra sighed and tried to will herself calmer though she  _ really  _ felt the need to hit something.

"Look...I need time to cool off. I'll see you at lunch." 

She said before shifting to her animal form and taking flight. 

  
  


_ Merlin's saggy Y-fronts! Why did it have to be Rowan? Why couldn't it have been fucking Tonks or someone? It would have been easier to be mad at  _ **_anyone_ ** _ else. _

She thought as she flew, that was until a familiar golden ball zipped past her, giving her  _ just  _ enough time to dodge the broom that followed. 

_ Fucking hell!  _

She was really glad that she had not been in human form on a school broom, least she would have been flattened.

Quickly getting out of the air and to the nearest seating area, quickly regaining her human form.

Only to have to knock away a wayward bludger with a hex.

"Whoa! Easy Moores! You trying to kill someone?" 

Cyra bit back a harsher curse that grew on her tongue.

"Just go back to whatever it is you are doing and leave me alone, Merula." She snapped, only for the other girl to drift over to where she was, dodging both Bludgers at once.

"Sure, after you tell me how the heck you became an animagus at thirteen." She said smirking as Cyra had to blast another of the balls away from them.

However, Cyra quickly turned toward her with a look that Merula had only seen once during their second year. 

"You better not tell a soul about this or so help me…" 

She began, flinching when Merula took a step back.

"Bloody hell Moores, it was a question. It's not like I actually  _ care!"  _

Merula exclaimed, earning a scoff.

"Yeah? Well, I know you've been trying to get me expelled for the last two years and nearly killed Rowan and I with that devil's snare!" 

  
  


Cyra retorted, earning a sigh.

"Yeah, expelled, not thrown in Azkaban!" 

  
  


Something about her expression changed at the mention of the wizarding prison and Cyra lowered her wand.

"Sorry. I just…" 

Cyra sighed and shook her head.

"You're on edge."

Merula pointed out, earning a sigh.

"Yeah and judging by you practicing with second years, so are you."

The second years in question were mostly lingering toward the ground and out of sight and mind of the stands. Something Cyra was thankful for.

  
  


"I am not!" 

Cyra rolled her eyes and began to walk away. 

"Sure Merula. I'm gonna go get a broom. Maybe practice will help me relax."

* * *

Merula noticed a few things about Cyra in that half-hour of practice. She was aggressive, much more than usual, and seemed to be running on muscle memory.

  
  


That was until Skye Parkin came onto the pitch. Then Cyra seemed to freeze, even becoming so distracted that she took a bludger to the shoulder, which hurled her from her broom and into the sand.

Merula hadn't thought about it when she had gone to her rival's side, wincing when she noticed the blood on the sand.

"What is wrong with you not being able to stay on a broom, Moores?" 

She teased, earning a glare.

"Fuck you, Snyde." 

_ Well her mouth isn't broken. _

She thought just as Skye came over.

"Merlin mate, what happened?" She asked, though Cyra—to Merula's surprise—sent her a dirty look.

"You know bloody well what is on my mind. Now can two geniuses help me to the infirmary? I don't even want to know where the blood is coming from." 

The sarcasm was harsher than normal, Merula noticed though she also saw how the Gryffindor chaser looked almost hurt by the tone.

"Hey, whatever is going on between you two twits can wait until  **_after_ ** you're not at risk for bleeding to death." 

She said, filing this interaction in the same part of her brain as the werewolf scrolls. Just what was up with Moores? She was an–obviously unregistered–animagus, had scrolls she had written out about werewolves stashed under her bunk, and now seemed distracted by something Skye Parkin knew about.

Maybe Ismelda was right? Maybe Cyra Moored was a werewolf? Or perhaps it was Parkin? Though the Slytherin beater didn't seem all that close to the Gryffindor chaser.

At least not from the conversations Merula had overheard in the locker rooms sometimes during scrimmages.

As she helped Cyra to her feet it became obvious that most of the blood was from scooting across the ground, though Cyra was favoring a leg as well as a pretty messed up shoulder.

* * *

"I swear is everyone in your family this prone to getting hurt?" 

Cyra would have laughed at the reference to her brother's daring adventures if her mind wasn't still whirling with the conversations she had the previous night and just earlier that morning. 

"At least this is because Quidditch is dangerous and not chasing after myths." Cyra retorted, wincing as her shoulder was bound. 

The healer only nodded before handing her a cup of something that smoked and upon drinking it, burned like acid down her throat.

"Tastes like tar, doesn't it?" Merula commented from where she stood by the curtains, earning a look from Skye.

"Oh shut up Snyde," Cyra grumbled before laying back against the pillows, wincing as she did so.

"Yeah, Snyde shut up. Can't you see she's hurt?" 

Cyra glanced at Skye and rolled her eyes.

"Skye, thanks for the help but I've only got a bum arm and a roadmap of scratches. I think I can handle Merula...Even if I only have use of one arm." 

  
  


* * *

"Is Cyra awake?" 

Cyra tried not to groan at the sound of Rowan's voice though she did use her left arm to push herself up a bit more.

"I am...Pretty hard to sleep when your shoulder feels like pins and needles." Cyra retorted, her stomach knotting with guilt when she saw the bloodshot eyes behind her friend's glasses.

"What happened? I heard that you had a fall after…." 

Cyra cut them off.

"Bludger to the shoulder thanks to a second year not knowing how to bat." She retorted "Merula and I ended up giving quidditch lessons to a group of hopefuls. Nothing more." 

She could tell Rowan wanted to say something but was afraid to and after her display earlier, she couldn't blame them.

"When I get out of here tomorrow...Why don't we go to the three broomsticks for lunch? I did promise we would talk and well….I was a complete tosser earlier. I'm sorry about that, by the way." 

  
  



	27. Boggarts pt 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cyra has a dream that makes her turn to an unexpected source for help and boggarts start to infiltrate Hogwarts.

_ A dark shadow loomed over a whimpering, blurred figure. The sound of crying was evident as well as screaming.  _

_ "exitio fulgur Maxima!"  _

The voice was so like her own but deeper, harsher, and dripping venom. Cyra's heart was pounding as she set up in bed, glancing around her.

_ What was that _ ? She wondered, feeling sick to her stomach for some reason. She had never heard of that spell before and certainly had never cast one. 

_ What the hell was that? _

She wondered, running her non-wrapped hand over her face.

_ Visions or not. I am going mental...Completely mental.  _

She thought with a sigh as she stood up, stretching a bit even though the bruises on her ribs and back protested.

* * *

Cyra left the hospital wing early that morning before breakfast had even begun. She  _ had  _ to ask someone about the spell from her dream.

If it was a dream.

She wasn't surprised when she found Merula already awake, sitting on a sofa with a green lamp floating by her as she read from a rather old looking book.

"You know a lot about magic, can I ask you something?" 

She asked, earning a look from Merula that was a mix of confusion and irritation.

"Shouldn't you still be holed up on a hospital cot?" 

Merula replied, earning a sigh.

"Merula, we may not get along but I've seen you use advanced spells and I can see how smart you are. I need help and I'm pretty sure you're the only one who can help me." 

Merula arched a brow at that, though she just smirked.

"Oh, so you are saying I'm the better witch?" 

She retorted, earning a sigh.

"I'm saying you were raised with magic...I couldn't even have a toy broom. You have a better understanding of it than I do." 

A silence passed over them then, though Merula eventually nodded.

"Fine but make it quick. What do you want to know?"

* * *

Merula noticed how Cyra seemed nearly uncomfortable with the question before she finally spoke.

"exitio fulgur." 

Merula felt her brows shoot up at those two words.

"What?" 

She asked, earning a sigh.

"The Spell, exitio fulgur...Do you know what it is?" 

Cyra asked and Merula could only nod.

"It's a darker spell, originally used in interrogations but can be used as a defensive spell and to even break barriers. Why? How do  **_you_ ** even know of the spell?" 

Merula asked, her mind tracing back to the many lessons she and her mum had while her father was away.

"Never mind. I...I just wanted to know." 

_ Why does she sound frightened? The spell isn't that bad. Nowhere near the unforgivable curses. _

Merula thought before sighing.

"I can't believe I am saying this but I can show you the spell...It's difficult, even more so in its Maxima form but it could come in handy if you're fighting something like a werewolf." 

She saw Cyra stiffen and prepared herself for an argument. Then she saw Cyra deflate.

"Fine." 

With that Cyra got up and headed toward her dorm, leaving Merula to wonder what had happened. 

_ Okay, she has scrolls about werewolves, turns into a bird, knows a dark spell by some unknown means, and just asked me for help. Maybe Madame Pomfrey should check her for brain damage. _

Merula thought, shaking her head as she turned her attention back toward her book, deciding to ask later.

_ Why did I offer to show her the spell? Not like miss goody-goody will ever use it.  _

* * *

Cyra was quieter than usual during breakfast. Her mind preoccupied with that dream and the spell that was so obviously cast in her voice.

"We're still going to Hogsmeade right?" 

Rowan had asked right before the owls began to deliver mail, earning a nod.

"Yeah, I promised, didn't I? I just need to get back before dusk. I need Merula's help with something." 

That earned quite the mix of looks from the three people sitting around her, though before anyone could ask a rather shaken Penny practically fell into a seat beside them.

"What's wrong with you, mate?" 

Cyra asked, taking note of how pale the blonde was.

"Werewolf in the greenhouse." 

Shooting a glance at Chiara, Cyra asked "what?" 

"It wasn't a werewolf...but it was…. A Boggart Madam Sprout called it." 

She managed, causing Cyra to arch a brow.

"A boggart? At Hogwarts? Don't they usually inhabit topographical locations?" She asked, earning a shrug. 

"I don't know but seeing that thing here I just kept seeing…" Penny began, only to bolt from the room.

"Seems like she has a history with werewolves." Chiara commented although Cyra could see the way her eyes had dimmed.

Reaching under the table, she took the platinum-haired girl's hand. 

"I'll talk to her later. Right now I just want to finish breakfast with my friends." 

  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So the spell mentioned in the beginning is an attempt to give an explanation and name to the unnamed spell used by Voldemort during the battle of hogwarts.


	28. Grey hour

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A secret admirer, a dark spell, and an odd moment of civility between rivals.

"Who do you think sent you the care basket?" Rowan asked as they sat with Cyra in the three broomsticks, earning a snicker.

"Whoever it was is trying too hard. I mean a pack of chocolate frogs would have been fine but not half of the honeydukes shop." 

Rowan sometimes forgot how Cyra could be so blunt even if what she was saying wasn't meant to be harsh. 

"Look on the bright side, at least your secret admirer didn't send you a pack of gobstones." 

Rowan retorted, earning a snort.

"I think I would  _ prefer _ the gobstones. At least  _ that  _ wouldn't have cost twelve galleons and nearly landed a owl in my plate!" 

Rowan was surprised by the way everything seemed to go back to normal between them, even if Rowan felt it should be them to apologize and not Cyra.

"So anyone you're hoping it is sending you things? I mean that poem basically screamed ' _ notice me'." _

Rowan asked, changing the subject and earning a sigh.

"Who knows. It's probably not one of my closest friends though since they would probably just tell me." 

Cyra retorted before snickering and adding

"What if it's Ismelda?" 

Rowan couldn't help but giggle at that.

"Merlin, that would be like dating a manticore!" 

* * *

Merula wasn't sure why she was bothering with this or if Cyra even would come.

_ Little miss perfect will probably chicken out. _

She thought, only to let out a rather undignified yelp when she felt a hand on her shoulder, resulting in her very nearly tripping over herself.

"Merlin's saggy left bollock Moores! The hell you trying to do?" Merula yelped, the severity of the wizardry swear causing Cyra to snort in amusement.

"Sorry. Forgot the transformation is nearly soundless." Cyra retorted, offering her a hand up, only for it to be ignored.

"I'm surprised you came. Isn't the dark arts to  _ extreme  _ for your tastes? Wouldn't want to be called a death eater would you?" 

Merula asked though she saw a look flash across Cyra's face that she didn't quite expect.

_ Did she just look scared? Of what?  _

"Just shut your gob and show me the spell, Snyde." 

Merula was caught by surprise at the retort.

"Merlin Moores, why are you in such a hurry to learn this spell?" 

She said, taking notice at how Cyra flinched at the question.

"I am a Legilimens but sometimes….Sometimes I get flashes of things. I saw myself use this spell but I couldn't see at  _ who  _ or  _ why _ I was using the spell." 

Cyra's confession caught Merula by surprise.

"And you're suddenly afraid you're going to turn into Voldemort the second or something? Yeah, I don't see it." 

Merula retorted before drawing her wand

"The motion is simple, though it  _ does  _ follow your wand so remember that if you ever do use it." She said, making a flicking motion before closing her eyes.

_ I can not believe I am teaching this to her _

_..least of all trying such a powerful spell. This could go wrong in so many ways. _

Merula thought though that didn't stop her from saying the words:

"exitio fulgur!" 

A bolt of white lightning shot from her wand and toward the rocky ground deep in the reserve. 

"Holy shit." 

She heard Cyra breath as the spell fizzled out, leaving Merula drained of energy.

"Told you I was the most powerful witch at Hogwarts." She retorted, earning a smirk.

"Maybe among the students." 

Merula could feel heat crawl into her face at that. Was Moores  _ actually _ complimenting her?

"Wait, you were actually impressed by that?" She asked

"You said it yourself, it's an advanced spell and you cast it without much issue. You obviously are a brilliant witch." 

Merula turned away so that Cyra wouldn't see her face grow even redder. 

"And now you're just mocking me." 

She retorted, trying not to be annoyed by that though the other girl's next remark surprised her

"I'm really not. We might not get along but keeping up with you in class is a challenge. Even if we  _ don't  _ get along I have to admit you've got talent."

  
  


"Yeah, well...Glad you're finally seeing you're not the best." 

* * *

"So what you said about being forbidden from being around any magical item. Was that true?" 

Cyra wasn't surprised by the question though she wished it was one that people wouldn't ask.

"Most magical thing I could own was chocolate frogs and licorice wands. I may as well been a muggle-born. My mum was super strict and my dad was always away on business." 

  
  


"That wasn't just  _ strict,  _ Moores. Strict is not being shown any spells or allowed on a broom alone till you complete your first year. Most magical people teach their kids spells  _ before Hogwarts _ but won't let them use it unsupervised." 

Merula commented, earning a sigh from Cyra who felt the need to defend her mother, though she  _ did  _ hold some bitterness toward some things.

"So everyone from half or pureblood families tell me. Though I understand my mum's reasons….I just wish I didn't come to Hogwarts completely clueless." 

  
  


Merula scoffed at that, glancing up at the sky.

"Well you weren't completely clueless all the time and you weren't the one locking people up with a devil's snare." 

Cyra knew that was most likely the only thing close to an apology she was ever going to get.

"Yeah well...I'm pretty sure we both have been terrible to each other over the last two years. You may have started it but I didn't have to start hitting below the belt either." 

She retorted before adding:

"And I had no room to talk. My dad's family are adept with the dark arts and most of them followed you–know–who." 

"Voldemort. Stop being afraid of a  _ word,  _ Moores."

Merula retorted, which earned her a dirty look.

"Words hold power, Merula." 

She argued, earning a scoff.

"Yeah and even Dumbledor thinks people should use his name so not to fear a word. Why are you so skittish about the dark arts or mention of the war anyway? You practically jinxed bubblegum-puff a few weeks ago for talking about the underground anti-muggle movement the ministry stopped." 

Cyra froze at the mention of that and closed her eyes. She would not show weakness in front of Merula Snyde. There was no way in hell.

"Why do you care? You hate muggles yourself." She managed to ground out, earning a glare.

"I don't actually. I just think we should have a policy like MACUSA where there is a line separating muggles and magic. You would have  _ less  _ accidental sightings of magic and more places would be like Hogsmeade." 

Merula explained before sighing

"Look, some muggles may be okay with magic  _ but  _ most aren't, and don't tell me that if given the choice you would choose living magic free with your mum over living in a magical household."

Cyra didn't have the words to respond to that, not after the series of letters she had been writing to her uncle and mother over the last month.

"I'm not going back this summer." She confessed after walking in silence for several minutes.

"What?" 

Cyra crossed her arms as she glanced over at her rival.

"My mum and I disagreed on quite a few things and she is staying in the states with her sister and grandmother while I will be moving in with her squib brother Charles and his wife on their small reserve." 

She confessed, earning a smirk.

"Well,  _ that  _ is better than living like a muggle. Maybe he will at least let you buy a broom. Seeing you flutter around on that ancient school broom during matches is just pathetic." 

  
  


Merula retorted then paused, brow furrowing as she glanced over at Cyra.

"What about your father? Why aren't you staying with him? Not that I care but this just seems weird." 

  
  


Cyra closed her eyes, coming to a stop as they neared Hagrid's hut.

"Because my dad is in Azkaban." 

The confession rolled off her tongue like acid and she didn't dare meet the other Slytherin's eyes. Not after giving her so much hassle over her parents' imprisonment for the last two years.

"The daily profit...The raid...Your father was in on that? I didn't see Moored in the daily profit." 

Merula asked and Cyra felt torn.

It was either get called a liar or risk her lineage coming into the open air, after all, Merula  _ wasn't  _ exactly trustworthy.

But neither was Skye.

"That's because my Mum refused to take my father's name. Moores is  _ her  _ name." She confessed after a while 

"she and dad had an agreement to make mine and Jacob's life easier. He cut ties with his family and moved to a mostly muggle town and took  _ her  _ name. Though obviously he still kept ties with his family since he and two of his cousins were arrested last month." 

  
  


A heavy silence passed over them and Cyra was sure she was going to be accused of trying to milk this for sympathy but instead Merula took a seat on the rock beside her.

"I always thought you had it easy. You seemed unbothered by Jacob's disappearance, seemed that your family was perfect. Guess we both have a pretty fucked up situation." 

Merula said after a few minutes, causing Cyra to look up.

"Yeah, I guess we do." 

She agreed before another stint of silence followed.

"The repeating names in the paper were Sallow, Felten and Pussett. Which are you?" 

Merula asked after a while and though she feared to answer, Cyra allowed the answer to fall from her lips.

  
  
She half expected Merula to make a jab at her after she had answered, though Merula only nodded.

We'll talk later, lets get back to the castle for lunch before your friends think I killed you."


	29. Of Civility

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Quidditch and Cyra agrees to hang out with Skye.

"So you and Merula actually  _ talked  _ to each other? Without fighting?" 

Rowan asked as Cyra joined them for lunch in the courtyard.

"Yes, Row. We did. Merula  _ can  _ be civil when she  _ wants  _ to be." Cyra retorted "don't get me wrong, she's bad but she isn't  **_that_ ** bad." 

She said before sighing and laying back on a grassy spot, arms folding behind her head.

"What if it was Merula who sent you that care package?" 

Tonks suggested, earning a choked laugh from Cyra who glared up at her.

"Tonks, I love you but I think you have officially lost it." She retorted "Merula is a housemate and  _ maybe  _ could be considered a friend  **_but_ ** I very much doubt she likes me like that." 

Cyra retorted before adding with a snicker

"I also don't see Merula writing poetry. at least not long-winded badly written poetry." 

  
  


"A poem?" Tonks asked her mouth curling into a smirk, prompting Cyra to roll her eyes.

"It's in my trunk, Tonks. I'll let you read it after practice, which I should get to before madame hooch has me polishing broomsticks for a week."

  
  


Rowan grabbed Cyra by the arm before she could walk away.

"I thought you were supposed to sit out on games for a while?" 

The smirk from Cyra caused Rowan to groan.

"But, like usual, you're not going to listen?" 

  
  


They guessed, earning a chuckle.

"I'll play keeper alright? Less likely to be hit with a bludger. Besides, today's practice is with Gryffindor and if I sit out Merula won't shut up about it for the next week." 

  
  
  


-

* * *

"Okay, an owl nearly hit me in the face this morning  _ and  _ now you have musical howlers? Either someone is in love with you or is trying to kill you with embarrassment." 

Merula snarked as she changed into her quidditch rooms beside Cyra, who had turned bright red in the face at the attention the love note had gotten.

"Probably bleeding both! No one knows I  _ listen  _ to The Black Moon Knights, to begin with!" 

Cyra retorted, earning a snort of amusement.

"Except most of Slytherin, you mean. We  _ hear  _ you singing in the showers, Birdbrain." 

Cyra responded to that by throwing an extra shirt at the other girl's face, though it didn't keep her face from heating up.

"Shut up, Snyde!" 

* * *

  
  
  


Merula grimaced as she wiped away some of the mud on her uniform.

"Okay, whoever thought it would be a genius idea to play in the rain has never been a seeker nor never crashed into someone mid-flight."

She grumbled, earning a smirk from Cyra.

"Hey you caught the snitch  **_and_ ** you managed not to land in Hagrid's vegetable patch. Can't say the same thing for Charlie." 

Cyra retorted, earning a look.

"would rather  **_not_ ** need to soak for an hour to get the mud out of my hair, Birdbrain." 

Merula retorted, though Cyra just sent her a quizzical look at the nickname.

However, before either could say anything else, a familiar scarlet clothed figure came through the doors.

"Hey lion-breath, wrong changing area!" A second-year called out, earning a groan from nearly all the upper years.

"Chill people, the match is over. What do you want Skye?" Orion asked, turning toward her.

"I just wanted to see how Moores was doing. She took a spill from her broom yesterday." 

Skye answered and Merula could have sworn she saw the blue-haired girl's face pinken.

"I'm fine Skye, besides, Orion agreed to let me play Keeper until I am back to a hundred." Cyra retorted, not really phased by this whole thing as she peeled off the rain-soaked shirt.

Merula tried her best not to wince at the sight of the bruises that were still visible beneath the straps of the other girl's undershirt.

_ Why hadn't those been treated? _

She wondered, though her attention was once again drawn to Skye, who nearly tripped over herself as she took what Merula assumed was a step backward in shock at the sight.

"Are you sure you're well enough to fly? I mean…" Skye began to stumble over her words and Merula rolled her eyes.

"What air brain is trying to ask is why do you look like you got stepped on by a troll?" 

She said, ignoring the look Skye shot her way.

"It's just bruises, guys. No need to waste energy healing a bruise." 

Cyra retorted.

"Bullocks," Merula muttered before grabbing her things to step behind a changing curtain.

"You know dittany doesn't take energy to heal."

She heard Skye point out, though Cyra just retorted

"Can you guys relax? I've had much worse heal on its own than a couple of bruises and scrapes." 

Merula groaned inwardly and shook her head.

_ Merlin, she's an idiot. _

She thought quickly changing out of her soaked clothing before heading toward the exit.

"Don't forget we're supposed to meet later, the Astronomy tower, preferably."

* * *

"What does she want?" Skye asked once Merula was out of earshot, earning a shrug from Cyra who finished dressing.

"She wanted to talk with me after practice." 

Cyra answered before adding "what's up? Aren't you cold? You pretty much flew  _ into  _ the muck at least twice." 

She noticed Skye shift slightly, though she brushed it off.

"What? Can't I check up on one of my best mates?" 

_ Best mate? Jee...I wonder why  _ **_that_ ** _ is. _

Cyra couldn't help but think as she handed the Gryffindor a towel.

"You  _ could  _ have waited until you weren't at risk of catching your death of pneumonia." Cyra retorted, smirking a little as she noticed the blush that crept over the other girl's face.

_ Well, that is new. _

Skye accepted the towel before she said in a tone that sounded a bit nervous coming from a sports stars' daughter.

"A bunch of us are thinking about going to the Weird Sisters concert in Hogsmeade tomorrow evening. Wanna come with? We haven't really hung out since that drama last year." 

Cyra really wanted to groan at the very mention of the feud that had gone on for most of the season the previous year.

"Yeah, guess I just didn't want to risk a repeat of last year." 

Cyra really wished she could take those words when she realized how harsh they sounded and saw the expression on Skye's face.

"I thought you said we were still friends?" 

Cyra let out a breath and refrained from rubbing at her temples in frustration. Why was what she  **_wanted_ ** to come out of her mouth always doing so in the worst ways possible?

"We are Skye. I just don't want that kind of drama again, I have enough going on right now with family stuff." 

She answered, half expecting a burst of anger, though it didn't come.

"I guess I deserve that. I was a horrible friend. I really would like a fresh start though, think we can do that?" 

Cyra nodded.

"Yeah, of course." 

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So question:
> 
> Should I include the "cheesy" poetry in this or leave it to the reader's imagination?
> 
> I will attempt to write the poems out if people want it but I am no poet.


	30. Boggarts pt 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cyra ends up shaken by something and Tonks proves to be a strong witch despite her usual mischief

It was odd, to say the least, talking with her sworn enemy as though they had known each other since forever. However, as they talked it became obvious that had things gone just a little differently, they possibly would have.

After all, she had known Barnaby and some of the others in Slytherin before ever coming to Hogwarts. 

"You know this is just going to make me want to kick your arse even more, right?" 

Merula asked after a while, earning a smirk from Cyra who didn't bother to look her way.

"I honestly was hoping it wouldn't. Honestly, you drive me crazy  _ but  _ I won't deny that wanting to beat you has made me try harder in all of my classes." 

Cyra admitted and Merula arched a brow before snickering at a memory from the first year of History of magic.

  
  


"Oh please, as if Khanna wouldn't kick you under the table if she caught you zoning out." 

She retorted, watching a strange look akin to disgust came over her rival's face. 

"They." 

Cyra said, practically hissing the word.

"What?" 

"They prefer neutral pronouns." 

  
  


Merula could hear the venom forming behind Cyra's words, silently daring her to say anything against the Ravenclaw.

"Merlin, I forget how open-minded half-blood families can be."

Merula commented under her breath before adding before Cyra could get defensive. 

"Alright, they would kick you under the table." 

Merula couldn't help but roll her eyes at the expression on the other Slytherin's face.

"What? Surprised I didn't call them a mud-blood or blood traitor or whatever due to their identity?" 

She quipped, adding in her head

_ Unlike you, I don't call the caldron black when I am made out of the same iron cast. I'm just surprised  _ **_that_ ** _ rumor hasn't spread by now. _

  
  


* * *

"Thanks for the help with the essay. I can't believe that we covered that much in the two days I was out sick." 

Chiara said as she followed Tonks out of an empty classroom.

"It was no trouble. It sucks that you're sick so often." Tonks responded, only for her attention to be drawn to a flash of light from a nearby stairwell.

"What in Merlin's name?" Chiara commented though it didn't take either of them long to spring into action and toward the noise.

Both froze when they saw the green skull-shaped cloud glowing at the top of the astronomy tower.

"What did you do?" 

Tonks demanded when she saw exactly  _ who  _ was located in the room.

"I didn't do anything! Merlin, why does everyone think I am to blame for everything?" 

Merula retorted just as the creature seemed to shift in appearance until there in its place was a dark, wheezing creature that Tonks instantly recognized as a dementor.

"Oh bloody hell." She swore, instantly realizing what they were dealing with. She just really hoped she knew how to cast the spell correctly.

" _ Riddikulus _ !" 

In an instant, the black mass produced a sound like a balloon being deflated and hurled itself out of the room.

Tonks ignored whatever the other Slytherin was saying as she went over to the girl crouched on the floor, wand laying several feet away.

Cyra, for the most part, looked to be in shock and shaking. 

"I was showing her a spell and that thing seemed to come from her wand," Merula explained, actually catching Tonk's attention.

"You don't tell  **_anyone_ ** about this." 

Tonks said, glancing over at the other girl who rolled her eyes.

"Like anyone would  **_believe_ ** miss sunshine's boggart has anything to do with Voldemort?" 

* * *

She had never seen Cyra like that. Not even after the devil's snare or when the rumor of werewolves circulated Hogwarts.

That creature had seemed to come from her wand when doing the movements for the tempest spell, a less powerful version of the lightning blast, and Cyra's expression seemed to drain of all color.

Yet Tonks had been the one who could dispel a boggart. Why was it that  _ she  _ wasn't taught anything but offensive spells?

She should  **_not_ ** have had to be saved by a bloody Hufflepuff! 

Why had she stiffened up at the sight of the dementor? Why had she suddenly remembered events of three years ago? 

Merula cursed herself as she walked into her dorm room, practically falling onto her bunk.

_ I need to get stronger. There is no way I can become the best if I can't even beat a boggart!  _

She thought, grabbing a book hid beneath her bed, though her mind was lost to the scene with the boggart just minutes before.

  
  


* * *

"What if it's an omen? What if this means…" Cyra stammered as she tried to focus on anything  _ but  _ the sight of that pulsating green light.

"No, it's not. Cyra, a boggart feeds on your deepest fears. Look how it went from the dark mark to a dementor when Merula spoke up? There are no dementors at Hogwarts." Tonks said just as Chiara returned with a beaker of something.

"Here, it'll calm you down a bit but we need to figure out what is going on with these boggarts. I mean, weirdly, Merula was here when…" 

"It wasn't Merula. I...I asked her to show me a spell and...She has nothing to gain from sabotaging me. I have no reason to find the vaults now that Jacob is dead." She confessed, earning a sigh.

"Just...Be careful around Merula. She may be in the same house as you but that doesn't mean she is trustworthy." 

  
  


Cyra closed her eyes at that and nodded.

"I  _ know  _ Tonks." 

  
  
  



	31. In her head

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which an offhand comment sets wheels into motion
> 
> And Merula never calls anyone outside of her "circle" by their name.

"Professor Flitwick, we need to learn how to defend ourselves against these things! If it wasn't for that pink-haired  _ Hufflepuff _ …" 

Tonks walked in just as Merula was going into a tangent. 

"For once I agree with Merula. Until this boggart situation is solved I think students  _ should be _ able to recognize and defend themselves against boggarts." 

Tonks stated, wondering if perhaps Cyra  _ was  _ right about the self-titled best in their year. Could Merula actually have another side to her instead of the obnoxious, arrogant prat that she usually was?

"Why don't you ask your defense against the dark arts professor?" 

Flitwick asked, earning a scoff from Merula.

"No offense but the  _ professor  _ tends to have a kip in class or possibly be drunk on fire whiskey." Merula retorted "You are far better a teacher than he is." 

"And it's not like Riddikulus is a particularly dangerous or advanced spell." Tonks pointed out, taking note of the way Merula seemed to bristle at those words.

"Alright, I'll think about it but only because this is the fourth attack I have heard about." 

* * *

"Cyra? What's wrong? You've been a bit...out in space today." 

Cyra managed to glance up from her lunch, taking notice of how both Rowan and Penny were staring at her.

"I...Last night there was….something that happened and I...It gave me a lot to think about." She admitted, not wanting to worry Rowan with the fact that she kept having nightmares the previous night.

She jolted slightly when she felt a hand take hers.

"Merlin, what happened? Was it…" 

Skye allowed herself to trail off, though Cyra knew all too well what she meant.

"I don't want to talk about it." 

How could she confess to her rival and friend that she had night terrors where she was face to face with the dead dark lord. That her arm burned at the thought of the mark burning into her? That her fears was caused by a literal  **_mark_ ** that a boggart had taken the form of?

  
  
  


She had woke up to one of her roommates literally shooting her with a water spell and a groggy Merula standing in the doorway asking who was being tortured at three in the morning.

"Well if you ever need to...Know I'm here yeah? We may be opposite houses  _ but  _ that doesn't mean we're not friends outside the pitch." 

Skye said and Cyra managed a nod.

"Thanks, Skye. I appreciate it." 

* * *

"Why are you suddenly so interested in Cyra's well being?" 

Merula mentally kicked herself by making it that obvious.

"Since she woke up half of Slytherin house screaming at three in the flipping morning." She retorted though she couldn't get the image of the usually self-assured girl looking so distraught out of her head.

_ What the nine circles of hell is wrong with me? She needs to get the hell out of my head. It's not like anyone ever cares when  _ **_I_ ** _ go through the same shit. _

She berated herself as she headed back toward the Slytherin common room, which was surprisingly empty save for a few seventh years studying for exams.

_ Though Fairy floss is right, we do need to be prepared for anything, and I am not sitting around waiting on Flitwick to teach it to us. _

  
  



	32. Betrayal?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cyra lets her general anger get to her.

"Okay, spill...Something is bothering you and it's not just the creeps from a boggart." Rowan said after they managed to get away from Skye and Penny, earning a sigh.

"I had a vision while in the hospital wing. In it, I cast a lightning curse…. _ exitio fulgur.  _ It's even stronger than the tempest spell and…" 

Cyra paused, knuckles turning white as she gripped her robes.

"And then the boggart took the form of that mark and….What if it's an omen, Rowan? What if it means I…" 

Rowan had heard enough. 

"It doesn't mean  **_anything,_ ** Cyra. You know your visions are subjective at best  **_and_ ** you don't know the circumstances of the vision either because I can't imagine you cursing someone without a good reason." 

  
  


They noticed how Cyra seemed to tremble at those words. Did she not believe it?

"What exactly was the vision?" 

Rowan listened as Cyra spoke of a shadowy figure, the jeering voice, and the crying she had witnessed in the dream-like state.

"How it sounds is that you used the spell to protect someone, which, by the way, is the only way I can see you actively hurting someone." 

  
  


It was easy to see how Cyra's brow contorted and furrowed.

"Remember when I hexed Merula off the stairs while they were moving? I  **_could_ ** have badly hurt her had she not knew how to slow her fall." 

Cyra eventually said, earning a snort.

"Let's see...Devil snare, exploding your cauldron, the hurling hex, the conjunctivitus curse, curse of the bogeys, Furnunculus, not to mention all the rumors and petty nonsense she has done over the years. I think she deserved to have a taste of her own medicine." 

Cyra sighed and glanced toward the courtyard, remembering all too well how much they had been at each other's throat. 

"Yeah but I could be just as horrid to her. Just because I didn't always do things to physically hurt her doesn't mean I wasn't cruel." 

  
  


Rowan recognized the tone their friend took as she spoke, obviously thinking back on certain events.

"You know you don't have to forgive her for being an arse, right? Even if…" Rowan began, though Cyra cut her off.

"I know it seems mad but there is more to her. You haven't seen her in the common room." 

She began, brow furrowing

"Like when everyone is hanging out and doing their own thing, she is literally like everyone else. Sure she takes jabs at me whenever  _ but  _ usually in private it's dumb challenges with acid pops and pepper imps." 

  
  


Rowan arched a brow at that.

"Was  _ that  _ why everyone was cracking jokes about you spraying yourself in the face with Aguamenti?" 

  
  


The color of Cyra's face served as an answer though the girl just retorted

"Hey, that was nothing. Merula spat an acid pop clear across the room because she couldn't handle three in a row." 

Rowan couldn't help but laugh at  _ that  _ particular mental image.

"Remind me to get you a two-way mirror because that I would have loved to have seen."

* * *

_ Confringo! _

_ Defodio! _

_ Diffindo! _

_ Expulso! _

_ Furnunculus! _

_ Incendio! _

_ Flipendo! _

_ Bombarda! _

_ Stupify _ !

She mentally listed, trying to focus on the desired spell without speaking. After all, wandless magic was advanced and if she could just learn these few spells she could, perhaps, finally prove she was a strong witch if not the strongest student at Hogwarts.

This proved much harder than she imagined it would be and she felt as though she would develop a headache if she kept at it for any length of time.

  
  


_ I need to become stronger. If I can't beat a boggart then I can't protect myself from anything and wasn't that the whole reason my parents taught me all these spells? To protect  _ myself _ if the need were to arise? _

The thought of her parents seeing how pathetic she was the previous night disgusted her, not because they would be ashamed but because she knew she was stronger than that.

She  **_had_ ** to be. After all, unlike most other students she had no choice but to watch out for herself.

After all, you couldn't count on anyone to protect you except yourself. 

* * *

"I mean she could be trying to manipulate her  _ but  _ she seemed generally concerned this morning when I went to talk to Flitwick." 

Tonks said, brow furrowed as she tried to make sense of all of this. Merula  _ had  _ been concerned but for what reason? After all, she had never been particularly friendly with Cyra up until—what seemed like—this year. 

What had changed?

What was Merula's reasoning for all of this?

It didn't quite add up but what did the competitive Slytherin do that  _ did? _

"I'll go ask her." 

Cyra finally spoke, breaking the silence that had hung over her for the past thirty minutes.

"Are you sure that's a good idea, Cyra? I mean...This is Merula we're talking about. Who knows what she would do." 

Rowan pointed out, earning a look from Cyra as she pushed herself to her feet.

"This is Merula we're talking about. If she starts her shit, I can always cast Levicorpus on her." 

Rowan looked ready to say something but seemed to decide against it, though Tonks narrowed her eyes.

"Okay, that is all well and fine but not if she is wearing her uniform, you don't want to cross a line Cyra." 

The Slytherin just sighed and muttered something that sort of sounded like a sarcastic "yes mum." On the way out. 

  
  


"I have  **_never_ ** seen her act this way." Rowan commented, earning a sigh from Chiara.

"She's been through a lot and the revelation about her dad didn't help." 

The platinum-haired girl responded, eyes narrowing in thought.

"I just really hope she doesn't do something she'll regret." 

* * *

"Last night...That boggart...You had something to do with it, didn't you?"

Merula was at a loss for words where was this accusation coming from? Why did Cyra suddenly suspect her?

"What? No! I may have found the second vault but…" 

Merula was cut off by her rival suddenly shoving her hard against the wall, eyes narrowed.

"You're a complete bloody idiot. Rowan almost died last year because of me! Ben and so many others could have. Do you want something like that to happen again?" 

Cyra sneered, giving Merula enough time to push her away.

"What the hell Moores? Where is all of this coming from and why do you care what happens? If anyone is in danger it'll be me and…" 

"Because unlike  **_you_ ** I don't insist on acting like a bloody death eater."

  
  


Merula felt a mixed wave of emotion and her eyes burned. 

_ Of course, I get the blame. Of course, she brings that up!  _

She thought however before she could think of a response, Cyra was sent flying backward across the training ground.

"And unlike  **_you,_ ** " Merula began, willing her voice to steady "I am not a two-faced coward."

  
  
  



	33. Painful truths, Dirty lies

Merula thought about spreading the news of Cyra's heritage. To make her feel exactly like she did daily. To be judged by everyone for things, not her fault.

  
  


But she didn't. Not yet.

No, she had other ways to strike back at the other Slytherin. Starting with the owls that Cyra had been getting.

Whoever was suddenly enticed with Cyra wouldn't be after this. Not after everything she had planned.

* * *

"Okay, Merula has been a complete bitch all week. The hell did you do to her?" 

Tonks complained, hair nearly completely red in her irritation at whatever thing that Merula had done.

When Cyra didn't answer, Tonks dropped down across the table from her.

"Okay, what happened? You're being odd  _ and  _ Merula has become more of... _ everything  _ lately." 

She tried again earning a sigh.

"I trusted her Tonks! I made the bloody mistake of trusting that snake and…" 

Tonks sighed and shook her head.

"How do you know it was her fault?" 

  
  


Tonks felt herself roll her eyes when Cyra muttered out:

"She opened the second vault." 

_ Oh for the love of all things pure. _

She thought before sighing and running a hand through her hair.

"Merlin's bollocks, all this over vaults and secrets." She muttered, more to herself than anyone else as she glanced up at the candles overhead.

"Look, Cyra. You're one of my closest mates  _ but  _ I am gonna be blunt. I think you have jumped the gun." 

She said louder, earning a dirty look.

"But you said not to trust her!" 

Cyra practically shouted, earning a look.

"Yes, but I didn't tell you to go start the second wizardry war either! What exactly happened after you ran off to confront her?" 

Tonks retorted, crossing her arms in front of her on the table.

"I...May have called her a death eater." 

Tonks swore under her breath at that.

_ " _ Merula can be a pain in the arse but I wouldn't compare her to the likes of a death eater. Especially with what happened to her parents and your father." 

Tonks knew she had probably struck a nerve but didn't take it back. Cyra needed a dose of reality before someone got hurt or maybe even hurt themselves.

"My mother was a Black before she met my father. She was exiled for marrying a muggle-born. That doesn't make her nor I evil just because we have the family history. I think you may need to think about that."

__

* * *

"I swear they're both got the mental strength of a murtlap. Flobberworm slime, hexes flying, name-calling, I swear they act as a group of first years!"

Tonks complained as she sank into a chair across from Charlie Weasley at the three broomsticks.

"Makes me glad I only have Care For Creatures with them." Charlie laughed, earning a look.

"I have had a Mimbulus bulb erupt in my face today thanks to this little...whatever in Merlin's name it is between them." 

Tonks grumbled, earning a snicker from the Gryffindor.

"How about I buy you a butterbeer? Sounds like you need it." 

  
  


"I'd need a whole  _ gallon  _ of butterbeer and probably six shots of fire whiskey. I swear I am about to tie those two together with a charmed rope and hope they either work it out or kill one another."

* * *

For Cyra, my love

For always.

And I pledge we will be

your lips, a kiss through light

connected, joined, to never decay

for always

  
  


Merula wanted to laugh aloud at the messy scrawl but she didn't want to draw attention to herself.

_ Oh, come on, at least get somewhat creative! _

She thought, snickering to herself as she stuffed the writing back into the first envelope only to open the second.

  
  
  


In a silver minute, I transcend your soul

like a foggy shooting star

comes together like scarlet nothingness, blood-red

You light my pulse

you share my soul.

  
  


Merula couldn't help but burst into laughter at that particular piece of parchment.

"Oh, merlin...This is rich. This isn't even poetry!" 

She snickered, only to draw the attention of Ismelda who arched a brow.

"Okay, this is low even for you." She commented, earning a look.

"At least I'm not reading them aloud to anyone though this would probably make a chimera roll with laughter. Why do you care anyway?" 

  
  


Ismelda just retorted 

"Maybe I should tack up your song lyrics some time then? I mean private is private, Merula."

  
  


That effectively shut Merula up.

"I was going to return them to her desk. Don't get your knickers in a twist, murk." 

* * *

Cyra swung the bat toward the upcoming iron ball, venting her frustration on the objects in front of her while Skye sat afloat a broom, watching.

"I mean, these bloody boggarts are appearing everywhere and it's  _ her _ fault!"

She ranted as she sent a bludger sailing toward the goalposts.

"Well wasn't the cursed ice last year your fault? I fail to see the logic here, besides you've been off your game, and as much as I want Gryffindor to win the house cup, I also want an actual challenge." Skye retorted, smirking slightly when Cyra glanced up at her.

"Thanks, I think." 

She retorted before sighing and levitating the balls into their case.

"Want to race? I need to get some things off my mind. Then we can spend the day in Hogsmeade since I didn't go to that concert with you." 

She added, failing to notice how Skye's face changed.

"Really? You would want to hang out with me and not one of your other friends?" 

Skye retorted, earning a groan.

"Don't turn this into a situation like the Rath thing last year. I have enough drama with Snyde. I just really want to hang out with one of my friends who isn't either lecturing me or trying to convince me that there is a vampire in the clock tower."

Cyra retorted and if she had been paying attention she would have seen how the Gryffindor chaser looked disappointed.

"So I am the last choice?" 

Cyra closed her eyes at that and shook her head.

"Merlin's fluffy bathrobe, Skye. No! Look, I wanted to make it up to you, skipping out on that concert and all." 

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tried to imitate the bad poetry i remember writing at 13-14.


	34. Wars, Invisible and otherwise

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warning: Homophobic language and Ideals which fit with the time period.

**Trigger warning:** Homophobia /Homophobic Langauge.

  
  


❇

  
  


"So Quidditch is like muggle football? Is that why you're able to react so fast to the bludgers?" 

Skye asked, earning a laugh from Cyra who leaned back onto the grass

"Sort of, though I think half of that skill set was your impractical training methods last year. Getting knocked off a broom isn't exactly fun." 

Skye wasn't sure how to take the comment though Cyra just smirked her way and added 

"Pretty sure I owe you for getting me on the team. Your practice sessions helped a lot. I may be used to teamwork  _ but  _ not on a broom or with cannonballs hurling at my head." 

She said and Skye was grateful for dusk falling over so that the Slytherin couldn't see the flush on her face.

"Oh come on, you have natural talent." 

She argued, earning a chuckle.

"At flying but you saw me land on my arse during practice enough to know I had issues with quidditch!"

Cyra retorted before adding

"We've known each other for some time but I feel like we don't know each other too well off the pitch but I've had fun today. All things considered." 

  
  


"All things being Ismelda hexing you into the lake?" 

Skye quipped, earning a groan.

"Yeah well, I gave her horns to match her personality and it didn't ruin anything and you had a laugh at the fact I looked like a drowned Kneazle." 

Skye was about to defend the fact that she laughed when Cyra bumped into her, a sly look on her face.

A look Skye had until then only had seen from a distance.

"No offense but if the table had turned I would have laughed too. Nothing a hot air charm couldn't fix." 

_ How is she so calm about all of this? Well, that is a part of her charm.  _

Skye thought though one part of her blanched at the thought. After all, Cyra never seemed as relaxed around her as she did with her other friends.

"You know, my dad was asking about you in his last letter. Wondering if you would like tickets to their next match." 

Cyra quit nearly tripped over nothing and probably would have if Skye hadn't pulled her backward.

"After last year I highly doubted your father even wanted you to speak to me." 

Skye couldn't help but laugh at that.

"Actually I think he was impressed that someone of the opposite team spoke up on my behalf." 

* * *

"So how was your day with Skye?" 

Cyra groaned at Penny's question as soon as she sat down at the table where a few of her friends sat.

"If I said I had fun, would you leave me alone about it?" 

She retorted with a grin as she began to fill her plate with food before adding

"It was fine until Ismelda caused me to fall into a lake, though that was less embarrassing than the antlers I gave her in return." 

Cyra retorted, earning a snicker from Rowan.

"I would have loved to see that. Though you are Slytherin so you might want to sleep with one eye open." 

Cyra just snickered.

"In all honesty, I am more afraid of Merula than I am of Ismelda." 

She admitted around a mouthful of greens.

"Yeah, I mean her parents were death eaters. Ismelda is certainly the odd one out of her family...They are all Gryffindor and she's...well  _ her. _ " Penny responded, her voice dropping as she spoke about Ismelda.

"That explains  _ a lot _ ." 

  
  


The conversation shifted back to the events of the day. That was until she could hear whispering coming from the Gryffindor table. 

"I think it's disgusting."

"To make it worse she is a pureblood, or at least from one of the families that have more pureblood than half-blood ties." 

"Who would want to snog  _ her  _ anyway. Male or female for that matter." 

"Still don't know why we have to share a school with the likes of that dyke."

She strained her ears to try to figure out who it was they were gossiping about. 

"I swear people can be so gross. Why is it any of their business who snogs who?" Tonks grumbled from where she sat by Penny, looking up from where she had been bent over a notebook.

"Because they don't have a life. I mean I enjoy knowing who likes who and all that but I'm not going to judge anyone on it." 

Penny retorted, stabbing her meat pie.

"There is a difference between your gossip and that bullocks. Though I wonder who they are talking about." Cyra retorted.

"Can't you use your...you know...read them or something?" 

Rowan retorted, earning a look. 

"I can but I would rather not fill my mind with whatever rubbish they are thinking about. I'll just ask Skye after dinner." 

* * *

"Cyra Moores, can I talk to you a moment?" 

  
  


Cyra was caught by surprise by Felix's voice cutting through the crowd of voices, causing her to look up.

"What did I do this time?"

She retorted, earning a sigh.

"Nothing but I need to talk to you before you do something rash." 

He responded before sighing and producing a folded piece of parchment from the pocket of his robe.

"This was tacked to the notice board in the common room. All of Slytherin knows and I am sure it will explode in the next few weeks." 

Cyra felt like either crying or exploding in anger as she closed her eyes. She knew exactly who was behind this.

"I am going to kill that…" 

Felix didn't give her time to finish.

"Walk with me." 

Cyra sighed and glanced toward her friends before following her prefect out of the great hall.

"I know about the row between you two and I know the reasoning but I also know Merula and for all her faults...I don't think the boggart was a trap." 

He said once they were away from the crowds of students.

"And how would you know that?" 

She quipped, earning a sigh.

"She seemed upset after your fight and before you ask...Yes...I can read her. It's part of the job to be able to read students."

Felix answered with a sigh before adding:

"And she is going through a rough patch even without this little... rivalry between you two." 

Cyra wanted to argue her points, argue that she had been wrong by the announcement of her bloodline. However, it wasn't like Felix to involve himself quite so much in any of their previous tussles.

"What happened with Merula this time? That girl is a case." 

she said instead, earning a sigh.

"How much do you know about bloodline families?" 

  
  
  



	35. Changes

"A howler? Bloody hell, no wonder she has been worse than usual. We assumed that it was just because I compared her to her parents." 

Cyra sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose as she sat beside the seventh year in the owlery.

"Well, that certainly  _ didn't _ help. Think you two can deal with each other during the quidditch match next week?" 

Felix asked, earning a sigh.

"I'll try but she is a very stubborn person." 

  
  


Felix grinned slightly at that and glanced over at the younger girl.

"She's not the only one. Though I wouldn't expect less from the Snyde or Felten families. If only you two could learn to get along as your parents did."

Cyra arched a brow at him at that but didn't ask how he knew about that.

"See that white owl over there? It has more of a chance of growing five heads than us ever getting on."

Felix snorted at that.

Q"Just don't give her too much grief and don't lose too many house points. We need to beat Gryffindor." 

Cyra sighed.

"What if I make her fly into the great lake? The squid might like a new mate and her hair does sort of look like a starfish." 

* * *

"Who cares if she's bi? You see it all the time in nature except aphis and urchins." 

Liz commented, earning a sigh from Cyra who lay back on the bed, tossing a Puffskien into the air.

"I don't see how it affects anyone that she likes both? I mean I know Muggles tend to stick their noses where it doesn't belong but still... people's love lives doesn't seem like anyone's business." Cyra retorted as she sat up.

"Purebloods are  _ just  _ as bad. They are all for continuing their bloodline and all that." Liz pointed out before a knock came at their door.

"It's open." 

Cyra called, only for the door to open to reveal two girls that neither Liz nor Cyra were particularly close to.

"If you're looking for Abigale and Sam…" Liz began, speaking of their dorm mates though the shorter of the girls spoke up.

"We talked to Snape to change our room assignments but we have to find someone to trade with." 

"What do you think? Should we let them have our bunks?" 

Cyra asked Liz, earning a surprised look.

"Well...Ismelda is in my elective this year and I don't think she'll torture any of my creatures but Merula…" 

  
  


"I don't think she'll do much damage either. No more than I did when I sneezed and sent that bowtruckle flying."

Cyra retorted, before sighing and adding: 

"I may need to talk with Merula first. Otherwise, Snape would murder both of us for destroying half the dungeons."

As she got to her feet, Liz glanced over at her with a wide-eyed look.

"Are you sure that's a good idea? I mean…" Liz began, earning a sigh.

"I need to talk to her anyway and I was just as wrong as she was." 

  
  



	36. Revenge and truths.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Revenge and a very awkward teenage crush.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: brief Discussion of Homophobia.

"Not so easy now is it?" 

Cyra glared across the room though she sighed and deflated.

"If I admit that I deserve this you'll at least leave my friends alone? I get it, I blamed you for that...attack when you were only involved indirectly. I compared you to your parents when I…." 

Cyra stopped and closed her eyes before running a hand through her hair.

"What I am _failing_ at saying is I'm sorry for being such a knob. You can treat me as whatever just…Stop targeting my friends." 

She was expecting a hex or anything else other than the gritted response:

"I don't need your pity." 

Cyra could hear Merula voice falter through Cyra didn't mention it.

"I don't pity you, Merula. I don't like what happened to you about that rumor but...I don't pity you." 

The next thing she knew was that she felt a stinging sensation in her chest and found herself lying flat on her back.

  
  


"Bullocks." 

The word was hissed.

"That's all you ever felt toward me. A charity case because you had an oh so easy life. Well, guess what, _Felten_. You are now just as hated as I am." 

* * *

"What happened? This is a pretty bad burn and you're lucky she didn't hit you in the throat! Just an inch higher and..." 

Chiara commented, earning a yelp from Cyra who instinctively flinched away.

"Merula and I can't say I didn't deserve it. Though this was my favorite shirt and no amount of spells is going to get the singed smell out of it."

Cyra retorted, trying not to think too much about anything that had happened that night.

"Can I be blunt?" 

Chiara asked, earning a sigh from the darker-skinned girl.

"Chi, when aren't you? Especially when you think I'm being an arse." Cyra retorted, earning a sigh.

"I was there with Tonks that night." Chiara began, not glancing up at her as she placed some bandages on the burns, mumbling a sorry when Cyra hissed from the discomfort.

"Now there isn't much good that comes from my….problems. But I can read body language and, to be honest, Merula looked terrified but **_you_ **were too stubborn to listen." 

Cyra narrowed her eyes at that before sighing and leaning back on the bed.

"What am I going to do, Chi? I didn't only make a royal fool of myself _but_ I added fuel to a fire I didn't even _realize_ was burning."

She groaned, earning a chuckle.

"If it was Penny or Rowan, I could give you advice _but_ this is Merula and she is out of this wolf's territory." 

  
  


Cyra groaned a response before sighing.

"Well, I hope I can settle this soon."

  
  


* * *

"Burn ointment and Dittany for the next two days," Cyra told Skye the next day after classes, tossing rocks into the great lake as she tried not to think about how awkward the girl's dungeon was since the rumor started with Merula.

"I mean I deserved it but…" 

Skye cut her off then, eyes narrowing 

"You didn't deserve to be blasted so badly that you can't fly, Cyra! You were trying to apologize for Merlin's sake!"

Cyra closed her eyes as she glanced down at the waters, seeing the reflection that looked so much like Jacob.

Like their father.

"Yes but I know how I felt when I saw that parchment in Felix's hand. I **_am_ ** a Felten but it did hurt. I felt betrayed and I know that _must_ have been what Merula felt too. Not to mention all this fuss about her being bisexual."

Cyra retorted, sending a rock hurling into the water before sighing.

"I know most of the Quidditch team doesn't give a rat about her liking boys or girls or whatever. They could care less about _me_ being the same way but outside of that people are being jerks about it." 

She didn't notice the look on Skye's face at that confession.

"I couldn't imagine what that is like. I mean I know muggle and Wizard beliefs mix sometimes but I never knew it could get that bad." 

Skye admitted, earning a sigh.

"I saw a muggle girl get beaten by older boys just because of a rumor that she liked girls," Cyra admitted then sighed and returned to take a seat beside the Gryffindor.

"That's awful." 

"Yeah. At least here in the Wizardry world, it is your skill that matters. Not sex or gender or whatever. Only some care about that." Cyra retorted before falling back onto the grass dramatically.

"Though right now I am tired of both. What do you say that we skive off class and hang out somewhere? You're the only one I'm friends with that would be willing to do so and I've no desire of sitting through boring history or DADA." 

  
  


"Of course but where would we go?" 

Skye retorted, only to feel her face grow hot when Cyra stood and took her hand.

"I think I have a place." 


	37. Hidden In Plain Sight.

"Wasn't this room…" 

Skye began, only to earn a grin from the other girl.

"This room pretty much has anything you want in it. Right now we want privacy and to relax and enjoy ourselves so it seems more like a lounge." 

Cyra responded.

Why was it that every time that she saw that smirk her heart would practically do a tailspin? Why was it that when Cyra was upset or hurt that it angered her so? 

Her brothers had teased her about a crush but surely  _ that  _ wasn't the cause of the absurd behavior. After all, she was a Parkin, and Parkin's don't get nervous over anything. 

Not even over a pretty girl.

_ Right _ ?

* * *

"Merlin's fluffy pink bathrobe! You're good at this." Cyra swore as she lost the third game of exploding snap in a row.

"Maybe you just suck at cards?" Skye retorted though she could feel her face heat up at the compliment.

"That very well could be it." Cyra agreed, the grin returning to her face as she repaired and reshuffled the deck.

"Hey Cyra, can I ask a question?"

She said after a few minutes, earning a nod.

"Sure, what's up Skye?" 

"With everything that is happening with Merula, Do you ever regret telling people where you stand on the...you know...Sapphic scale." 

Skye felt like an idiot stumbling over her words, drawing her knees to her chest as she debated telling the other girl then and there what was going on.

"No. I don't. I don't like lying, least of all to my friends. Besides if I ever do fall in love, I don't want to keep it a secret. Which is why I told them about being a Felten and why I'm not going to try to do any damage control now." 

Cyra said almost nonchalantly.

"Maybe the descendent of a death eater playing curse breaker will be more interesting than some girl's love life."

  
  


Skye wasn't sure what to think about  _ that  _ tidbit of information. Was this out of pity or just because Cyra felt bad for what was happening?

"Are you sure? I mean she did nearly hit you in the throat." 

She said, earning a look from Cyra who put the cards down and sighed

"Honestly I don't think she meant to hit me that far up and I learned a long time ago that Emotions can make a spell more powerful and no matter how any of us feel about her, Merula  _ is  _ human and has emotions." 

"I honestly think you could befriend an Acromantuala." Skye retorted, earning a snort of amusement.

"I think Merula would be more of a Hungarian horntail." 

Cyra said just as Skye took a drink of butterbeer, which quite nearly caused her to choke on her drink.

"And that's coming from one of the few people who actually tolerate her." Skye managed to retort through a coughing fit.

Cyra just smirked, the amusement reaching her eyes.

"Don't choke over there, I would hate to have to tell your fans what happened to you. Penny would kill me."

  
  
  
  


* * *

"Where were you? I mean Binns didn't notice but…" Rowan began, earning a sigh.

"Rowan, I love you but Binn's class makes  **_anyone_ ** fall asleep. Besides, I didn't feel like going to class. You never lecture Tonks like this." 

Cyra retorted, earning a look.

"Yeah because last time I did Tonks managed to not only guess the Ravenclaw password but also filled my dorm with tiny frogs." 

Cyra grinned slightly at that as she shook her head. 

"That is Tonk's way of telling you she is smart enough. Maybe I should take notes from her. Maybe fill your trunk with streelers."

"Don't you dare!" 

  
  


Cyra laughed aloud at that, dodging a smack to the shoulder from the Ravenclaw.

"Okay, I won't only because I don't want the brightest magic-wielder here mad at me." 

"Flattery will get you nowhere, Cyra Moores!" 

Cyra just laughed again before finally turning her attention to the homework.

"So evidently Merula was the one who stole my mail. Still no idea who is sending me all that stuff though." 

Cyra said after a while, earning a snicker.

"What if it  _ was  _ Merula?" 

Cyra arched a brow before scoffing.

"How hard do you think that broom hit her first year? Because if  _ she  _ is sending me love letters then she  _ must  _ have brain damage." 

  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ten points to whoever can guess what song inspired this chapter.
> 
> Also no there won't be a love triangle because these characters are only 13 and crushes tend to come and go at that age. 
> 
> Merula also plays a larger role as the story progresses.


	38. One track mind

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cyra abd Chiara stumble upon a scene that sets her blood boiling and sets some things into motion.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: Homophobia and hate crime...alos some harsh langauge.

The next few weeks passed by with no major events outside of Cura waking up to find her bed swarmed by spiders and puffskeins  _ and  _ just general pettiness from Merula.

However during the first week of November during a trip to Hogsmeade, Cyra found herself making a decision that would set into motion things that over the next four years, would change her life forever.

  
  
  


* * *

"I swear Talbot nearly flew into that branch laughing at me. It's not my fault I didn't see that bat!" 

  
  


Cyra laughed as she and Chiara walked into Hogsmeade, earning a laugh from the platinum-haired girl.

"Too bad you didn't get the animagus of a bat." Chiara snickered, earning a half-hearted shove from the Slytherin.

"I'd rather croak than squeak thank you very much! Even if my eyesight is still shite in the dark." 

Cyra retorted with a smile, only to freeze up when she heard the distant sound of yelled spells.

"Want to see what is going on?" 

* * *

Cyra felt her blood turn to ice in her veins as she neared the shrieking shack, finding that there was a small crowd gathered, wands out and flashes of spells being cast.

"Fucking shit." Cyra swore under her breath, drawing her own wand and trying to think of a spell that would cause the group to disburse.

"Depulso!" 

She muttered, hurling one of the nearest people—a wizard in a Hufflepuff scarf—stumbling into a boy she recognized from Slytherin.

"What the…"

"Oh look, the dyke must have a girlfriend." 

Cyra recognized that voice and bit her tongue to keep her temper in check.

"Why don't you bugger off, Emily?" 

She said, glancing around to find a broken wand and bent double Merula behind her.

"Why don't you make me?" 

The pink-clad girl retorted, casting a spell toward Cyra who managed to dodge.

"Really?  _ That  _ is all you've got? Furnunculus!" 

Cyra retorted, smirking in amusement as the upper-class Gryffindor seemed to instantaneously break out in acne. 

"You bitch!" 

Another girl snarled, though Cyra wordlessly put up a shield.

"Slugulus Eructo!"

Cyra was knocked back several feet by the knockback jinx though she got to her feet, smirking and winded.

"Expelliarmus!" 

  
  
  
  


As soon as the others gave up and left, Cyra turned to evaluate the damage done to Merula and winced at what she saw.

"Here, this helps with the Slug vomiting charm." Chiara surprised her by saying to Merula, though, in all honesty, Cyra had forgotten Chiara was even there, not to mention had failed to notice that she had helped defend her during the squirmish.

"Those idiots did a number on you. What happened?" Cyra asked, earning a glare.

"Bloody hell, don't you people ever mind your own business?" Merula grumbled though the effect she was going for was lost as she doubled back over and spewed several more slugs.

"And leave you spewing snails and what else those twats were planning? Don't think so. How did they outsmart you anyway? Every time  **_I_ ** did I had to sneak up on you." 

Cyra said, earning a sigh.

"They bloody blindsided me...my wand…I'm going to kill them." Merula said as she leaned back, accepting the candy from Chiara.

"This is over that damned rumor, isn't it?" 

Cyra asked, watching as her rival flinched at those words.

"I want to bloody kill Tulip. I told her that was a bad idea...I  _ told  _ her that…" Cyra could see the way her lips trembled and glanced over at Chiara.

"Go get Madam Pomfrey and tell her what happened. I'll get her back to the castle." 

* * *

Merula didn't understand it as Cyra bound her wounds with Ferula. Why was she helping her? Why had she jumped into the frenzy to defend her?

Since when did Cyra seem so willing to fight? When had Cyra's eyes gleamed so dangerously?

"Why?" She finally asked, hating the fact that she couldn't move too much without leaning on the other girl, thanks to injuries caused by the attack.

"Because I'm not letting anyone get hurt because of something as dumb as this. Shows how big of a coward they are…House of Bravery my arse." Cyra retorted, glancing down at the broken wand Merula still carried.

"Your wand...what kind was it?" 

  
  


Merula shot her a look, though eventually answered:

"Hawthorn. Why?" 

Merula retorted, earning a look that made her  _ really _ wish she could hex the other girl.

"Because you look like you're about to go into shock. Keep talking." 

  
  


* * *

"You were  _ supposed  _ to meet us at the Three broomsticks," Rowan said as she slid into the seat across from Cyra at dinner that night, earning a sigh.

"I had an emergency I had to deal with." She answered, earning a look.

"Like what? Getting into fights with half the school? Need I remind you that Merula…." 

Cyra cut her off, deflating.

"Look, the spells they were using...She could have been badly hurt. I couldn't ignore it!" 

She responded, earning a look.

"She would have ignored it if it was you or would have joined in! When will you realize some people aren't worth wasting time on? The more you are nice to her, the more she treats you like troll dung!"

Rowan said, though they instantly regretted it as Cyra stood.

"I started it this last time, Rowan. I was the one who accused her of setting that boggart on me and I was the one who compared her to her parents."

Cyra said, voice raising

"we may never be friends but I am going to treat her the same as I do Felix or anyone else, she's not the only witch with death eater parents but she is the only one who I sneered at about it." 

Rowan was about to apologize when Cyra walked off, leaving them lost for words.

"Try not to overthink it, Rowan. Cyra feels a sort of responsibility for what happened. Chiara says that Cyra looked  _ furious  _ by what they were doing to her." Penny spoke up, earning a sigh from Rowan who glanced back down at their plate.

"I just wish I understood why she was always cutting Merula so much slack." 

Penny shrugged then, brow furrowing.

"Maybe it's because she now sort of understands Merula? I mean Cyra's parents divorced a year before our first year, her dad is a death eater and is now in Azkaban. Plus this whole drama about Snyde being bisexual." 

  
  



	39. Animato Animagus

Cyra sighed as she sat outside in the courtyard, writing out a consecutive list of people to do some holiday shopping for and what to get them.

She figured Rowan would appreciate some sort of sweater or something equally soft and warm or a book.  _ That  _ was easy enough. However, there was Skye Parkin she had suddenly found herself interacting with more often than not and that was proving a problem.

  
  


"Hey loser, what are you doing? Returning all those love letters that you've been getting?"

Cyra glared up at the violet-eyed girl that was towering over her, an arm still in a sling. 

"You're lucky you're hurt or I would hex you." She retorted before turning her attention back toward her list, marking something out as she added:

"And no, I'm making a shopping list so I can start ordering things for Christmas." 

  
  


The scoff she got in response didn't surprise her.

"You and your friends are so juvenile. Christmas is for babies." 

"Oh bugger off, Merula. Don't you have first years to torment?" Cyra retorted, rolling her eyes though Merula just smirked.

"What? Hit a nerve? Aren't you going to that four-eyed flobber worm's…." 

Cyra muttered an incantation under her breath, causing an eruption of clear water to hit Merula in the face.

"For one, Their name is Rowan. For  _ two _ you don't get to insult them just because I saved your arse." Cyra retorted, earning a look.

"You are lucky my wand is broken Moores or I would blast you clear across this courtyard!" 

Merula retorted before slinking off, mumbling to herself and leaving Cyra once again alone.

_ Let's see, Skye likes jean jackets...maybe a jacket? Now...I just need to figure out where to spend this holiday. Rowan said I can spend the break with their family  _ **_but_ ** _ I don't want to deal with awkward introductions."  _

She thought, sighing. 

_ Maybe Hagrid needs help with the creatures? I could stay here over the holiday. _

She glanced toward the castle before standing. 

_ Maybe I can use the time to put an end to these boggarts and maybe brush up on my potions knowledge so I don't explode  _ **_another_ ** _ cauldron this year. _

She thought though she knew there was plenty of time between now and Christmas.

* * *

"Hey Rowan, got a minute?." 

Rowan nearly jumped out of their skin at the sudden voice behind them, though they quickly relaxed.

"Cyra! Merlin, you scared me."

Rowan yelped, earning a snicker.

"Sorry, I just wanted to apologize for last night. I know it seems odd that I keep defending her  _ but _ I can't shake the feeling that there  _ is some  _ good buried way down inside her somewhere." 

Cyra confessed, rubbing at the back of her neck slightly as she glanced down.

"Besides you haven't seen her not be….well... **_that._ ** But I  _ have _ . Yesterday...she was furious and spitting fire at everyone but...there was something else there. Something most people wouldn't believe was there." 

"Chiara told me what happened but that just makes me wonder when you became  _ that  _ close of friends with her? I mean, I remember you talking about her but I don't remember you becoming  _ this close  _ to her." 

Cyra sighed at that and took a seat near them.

"Meet me near the back of the clearing after classes...I have something to show you."

* * *

"You're an animagus? Since when? Are you registered? Why did you…" 

Cyra cut Rowan off by putting a hand over their mouth.

"Yes, a few months ago, no and I can only say it was to help keep someone company." 

Cyra whispered back, removing her hand as Rowan's eyes grew wider.

"What? Who? Who knows about this?" 

Rowan asked as soon as the hand was removed, earning a sigh from Cyra.

"Talbot, Chiara, You and Merula." 

"What! Merula Knows? You know she could have you arrested!" 

Cyra mentally slapped herself for even mentioning the Slytherin.

"She  **_won't._ ** Trust me, she had the chance to but she decided to spread the Felten thing instead." 

  
  


She insisted, recalling how Merula looked completely offended by the  _ idea  _ of sending someone to Azkaban.

"How can you be sure?" 

Cyra sighed and glanced up at the sky.

"Because if she was going to she  _ would  _ have already. At least  **_I_ ** would if I was in her place."


	40. Who she is

Cyra ventured out into the reserve before dinner that night, needing time to think. She wasn't aware of how far out she was until she saw a large, Leathery winged Creature glistening in the clearing.

"Tenebrus?" 

She whispered, watching as the skeletal creature perked up and walked over to her, wings fluttering slightly.

"Hey boy. Glad I see one friendly face here tonight." She said, leaning her forehead against the creature's dragon-like face, earning a wheezing snort in response.

Ever since her second year, she had taken to the herd of death omens, sketching them, interacting with them. so much that Hagrid had offered to let her volunteer with some of the creatures. 

Including the thestrals.

She stood there, stroking the creature's very thin fur as she tried to focus her thoughts.

"I am at a complete loss. Everything just seems to be going crazy. My dad is in Azkaban, my mum is in America and then there is the whole drama with Chiara and the animagus forms." 

She ranted to the creature, pressure building behind her eyes.

"I wish you could talk. Maybe you could tell me what's going on with me. I  _ want  _ so much...Like I  _ want  _ to be my own person but I want to make my mum proud. I  _ want  _ to understand Jacob but I also want to get out of his shadow." 

She confessed, feeling silly even though she knew she wasn't the only one who spoke to the animals like this.

Then again, if someone came by she would very much seem like she was talking to herself.

* * *

She avoided the self-proclaimed family night in the common room when she came in, keeping her head down and the hood of her robes pulled up so that no one could see her face, lest she had to deal with a certain housemate's snide remarks.

  
  


Once inside her dorm, she threw herself onto her bunk, startling Nyx from where he was curled near her pillows.

"Sorry." She muttered to the cat, draping an arm across her eyes. She wasn't sure how long she had been there before she felt something heavy land on her stomach, causing her to yelp and glare up at the culprit.

Only to find her rival smirking over her.

"What do you want?" 

She grumbled, moving to sit up.

"Someone left this for you in the common room. Felix told me to deliver it." 

Merula retorted, earning a look from Cyra who moved to open the parcel.

"Did he tell you to kill me with it?"

"No, but I couldn't resist." 

Cyra rolled her eyes at that and turned her attention to the package, arching a brow at the letter addressed to her in a scrawly script that did not seem to be written in quill.

"This must be from my uncle Charlie and his fiancee and of course they would send me a ton of candy...Feel free to help yourself to some."

Cyra retorted, removing the separately wrapped, larger parcel from the package.

She smirked slightly when she pulled a jacket out of the brown paper wrappings. It was made of a kind of leather that seemed to glisten slightly in the green light of the dorm and had a lining of emerald fleece.

"This is definitely from Charles's girlfriend. She is the only one in my family that sees Slytherin as just a house. None of my Mum's family would buy anything in Slytherin colors." 

Cyra commented, earning a quizzical look.

"Gryffindor?" 

Merula guessed, snatching a chocolate frog from the box.

"Obviously. That and Ravenclaw. Family ties to a house and all that." 

Cyra retorted, standing and slipping the jacket on, fashioning the belt about her waist.

"At least your aunt isn't a total bitch." 

Cyra glanced over at merula at that, unsure what to even say to that.

"She's okay. I don't know her that well really, my uncle avoids the family as much as he can, being a squib and all." 

  
  


A silence passed over them after that before Merula finally spoke.

"Your family judges you for the house you were sorted into  _ but _ they judge someone for how they were born? I mean, Squibs are seen as a weak link in the bloodlines but with how you've talked about your mother…" 

Cyra felt the familiar knot form in her throat.

"I don't want to talk about it, Snyde." 

She expected a snarky comeback though Merula just retorted

"Then stop wallowing in whatever it is bothering you and come to the common room, Barnaby convinced that one first year, Atkinson to tell us some muggle ghost stories and I figured you would find that entertaining with practically being a mud blood." 

Cyra wanted to take offense to that but found she didn't have the energy.

"Muggle Born and outside of the bloody mary bathroom mirror rubbish, I was enough of a witch to know not all of their tall tales were true." 

She retorted instead, earning a confused look.

"Do I wanna know?" 

"It's a dumb muggle thing. Even Sir Nicklaus would make a muggle crap themselves and the bloody baron is way more intimidating." 

Cyra responded before heading toward the door.

"And  _ now  _ you're talking like a pureblood. Seriously, Moores, you give me whiplash." 

"I may have been raised among muggles but two things I'll never understand. Their fear of ghosts and their stereotyping." 

  
  


* * *

"How was Slytherin Family night? Did you summon dementors or something?" 

Tonks asked as their group of friends met at breakfast the following morning.

"No, just stuffed ourselves on cauldron cakes and butterbeer, and a few of us held a dueling tournament in the duel club room. Nothing too extravagant." 

Cyra retorted, earning a hum in response.

"Is that why your hair is blue?" 

Cyra groaned and moved her ponytail around to assess the damage, wincing as she saw that her hair was a dark navy color.

" _ That  _ would be the doing of Emilia Atkinson, first-year Slytherin that fits in a little too well. I forgot about it." 

Tonks just laughed and shrugged.

"It suits you, though I have no idea how you play quidditch with all that hair. Does it not get in your face?"

"I would look dumb with short hair, Tonks." 

She was surprised when Rowan was the one to speak up.

"As long as you don't style it after a murtlap you'll be fine." 

Cyra very nearly choked on her tea.

  
  


"No worries. There is a limit to how muggle punk rock I am willing to be, thank you very much." 

  
  
  
  



	41. The Vault Of Fear

Cyra wasn't sure what was going on when someone suddenly knocked her from the bed the following night, earning a sharp curse from her.

"Shut up and come on. These Boggarts are getting worse and as funny as scaring the first-year students can be, it's getting old." 

Merula hissed, earning a look from Cyra who sat up, only then noticing that Ismelda and Merula were standing over her. 

"And you need me  _ why? _ " 

She complained, earning a smirk.

"Because you are usually a bloody coward and you're the only one who has ever entered a vault before," Merula responded, earning a sigh.

"Fine, give me five minutes to get some clothes on. I am not fighting  _ anything _ in my Pajamas." Cyra retorted, moving to stand and glancing toward Ismelda, who seemed to be either lost in thought or half asleep.

"Good. We'll go get Barnaby then we'll meet in the common room."

_ This is going to be fun...On a team with miss punk rock, Miss Psycho and...Barnaby Lee. What could possibly go wrong?  _

She thought with a roll of her eyes as she began to change into a pair of jeans and a long-sleeved shirt, recalling how cold the last vault had been.

* * *

"You got a new wand?" 

Cyra asked, earning a nod from Merula as they waited for Barnaby. 

"It's better than my other...or at least doesn't look like a smoothed twig. Want to test it?" 

Cyra shot her a look.

"Want me to break another one for you? It's two-thirty in the morning, I do  _ not  _ feel like sparring." 

Cyra retorted, earning a smirk.

"I'm still not sure you're not an imposter under poly juice potion," Merula responded just as Barnaby came stumbling into the common room, hair still a mess from sleep.

"Oh for fucks sake."

Merula muttered to herself, only to earn a snicker from Cyra.

"At least you don't have to deal with someone whining every five minutes." Cyra retorted, earning a wide-eyed look.

"I never thought you would say something like that. I mean I assumed Copper annoyed you but I always figured you were too nice to say it." 

Cyra just shrugged and stifled a yawn.

"He freaked out after losing a bloody teddy bear he kept in his robes at all times. It's one thing to have stuffed animals in your dorm  _ but  _ carrying them with you to class?" 

Merula snorted and rolled her eyes.

"Of course he did. Come on, let's go." 

* * *

Cyra was surprised by how put together Merula's group was as they made their way through the dark library, a strong scent of something that she couldn't quite place exploding from a dung bomb.

"That will keep that damned cat away," Merula muttered, smirking a little at what Cyra had to assume was her expression.

"Clever." 

Cyra couldn't help but mutter as they entered the hidden compartment, the cold wind billowing out around them.

Then she saw it, the red-eyed, paste white form of Voldemort standing before her with his wand pointed at them.

_ It's just a boggart. _

She reminded herself, stealing her nerves as she heard the creature began an incantation

"Avada.." 

"Ridikullus!" 

She shouted, watching in amusement as the creature suddenly morphed into a dancing clown. 

Glancing behind her she saw one boggart standing before Ismelda and Barnaby, shifting between a tall, pretty Gryffindor female who sort of looked like Ismelda and then the form of a man and an elderly woman.

In an instant, Barnaby stepped forward, shouting the incantation and turning the creature—once again the Gryffindor—Gryffindor—into a ragdoll.

With that taken care of, Cyra risked a glance over at Merula and saw her standing alone, eyes oddly shiny though there was no boggart to be seen.

"You guys alright?" 

She asked, earning a sigh from Barnaby.

"Could have done without the reminder of home." He retorted, though Merula just stayed quiet for several moments before finally barking out the order:

"Come on, let's get this over with." 

  
  


Opening the vault and removing the broken arrow and map, Cyra felt her stomach turn.

She wanted nothing more to do with these vaults.

"What do you think it means?" Ismelda finally asked, earning a look.

"Clues to the third vault, obviously. But a broken arrow? The  _ wand  _ I understand but…" 

Merula replied, taking the map and unrolling it.

"So that's where Jacob's stuff vanished to. I  **_should_ ** have known." Cyra retorted before sighing "come on, let's get out of here. I want to get back to bed." 

  
  
  
  
  



	42. Plans and Mistakes

Cyra couldn't sleep as she replayed all of the events in her mind, sneaking out in animagus form and sitting on the roof as she stared up at the sky.

"Stealing another of my private spots?" Talbot joked as he dropped down beside her, earning a sigh.

"I went into the second vault."

She admitted, earning a surprised look.

"What? Rowan was passed out in our common room when I left." 

Cyra chuckled and leaned back onto her hands.

"That's because I went with Merula and her two lapdogs," Cyra answered, watching his eyes grow even wider. 

"What? And you lot didn't kill each other?" 

  
  


Cyra snickered a little at that and sat straight.

"Hey, I share a room with Ismelda and Merula. If we can survive that arrangement we can survive working together once in a while." 

She quipped before sighing again and adding:

"The problem is every boggart I have faced has taken the form of something to do with he-who-must-not-be-named." 

  
  


"From what we've talked about, you're afraid that you have darkness inside of you. Why do you think that?" 

  
  


Cyra drew her knees to her chest and closed her eyes. She didn't want to talk about this but she knew she had to, least of all the nightmares come back.

"Because I am Slytherin. Because sometimes I find Merula's comments amusing and because sometimes I want to hex people." She confessed, earning a snort.

"How many times is it Merula you want to hex?" He pointed out, earning a hint of a chuckle.

"More times than not, the rest being Emily Tyler and her posse of idiots. I honestly hate Emily more than I ever hated Merula."

She confessed, earning a grin.

"You and half the school and being Slytherin means nothing but you being cunning and resourceful. Both which you proved to be when we were sneaking around making that potion." 

* * *

Merula heard Cyra return to their dorm around an hour before dawn and heard her sink onto the bed, disturbing the owl that had been perched on the frame.

"What? Nightmares because of some boggart?"

She asked, her voice barely lower than normal though, from the sound of snoring coming from Liz's bunk, it didn't matter much.

"Oh fuck off, Snyde." 

The response made Merula smirk. It was familiar, grounding even. It took her mind off of things and unlike most people, Cyra didn't run. She didn't leave.

She was a constant in her life, a challenge to surpass but still somewhat of an equal—something that seemed to cement itself into her mind after the previous night.

"I don't think you can make me." 

Merula was surprised when a pillow smacked her in the face over that one.

"You're right, not at four am anyway." 

Cyra retorted, suppressing a yawn.

"You know, if you would stop being a knob to people, you'd make an ace of a curse breaker." 

_ Okay, that was unexpected.  _

Merula said, feeling heat crawl into her face at the statement.

"I am not a knob!"

She said, unsure how exactly to even respond to that.

"Maybe not intentionally but you are." 

Merula responded with a jet of water directed right at the other girl's bed earning a yelp.

"Merula! I am going to kill you!" 

* * *

"And you two say I look bad after a full moon. What happened to you mate?" 

Chiara asked as Cyra walked into the great hall for breakfast the next morning.

"Boggarts, Merula, and I may have only had two hours of sleep because Liz snores like a fucking train." 

Cyra retorted, earning a laugh from Chiara and a hint of a smirk from Talbot.

"I could not imagine sharing a dorm with all three of those girls." Talbot retorted as he began to fill his plate.

"Ismelda spent the morning glaring daggers at me and Liz currently has a bloody imp living under her bed and it bit Merula and  _ that  _ is a calm morning." Cyra retorted, earning a snicker.

"Maybe I could smuggle you into Hufflepuff." 

Chiara retorted, earning a snort from Cyra 

"With Tonks? I think I would be better off sleeping in the belfry. Dung bombs and Screaming Yoyos isn't entirely my thing and if she even expected I was near there she would prank me." 

Chiara's brow furrowed as she glanced down at the nearly empty plate in front of her.

"Will you be alright for tonight? If not you should get some sleep." 

_ Great. I faced a Voldemort boggart, had to listen to Merula's bloody mouth, and now I have werewolf duty. I forgot about the full moon. _

Cyra mentally complained before sighing.

"I'll be fine, Chi. I managed to balance classes and searching for the vault of ice last year. I can balance one night." 

Cyra tried to reassure her, though neither of them seemed convinced.

"And I can get a wide-eye potion if I feel the need for it. stop worrying so much."

  
  


* * *

"Why don't you brew your own or get braids to do it for you?" 

Merula drawled as she lay on her bed, trying to ward off the tiredness she felt.

"Because I may have improved at potions but Snape still doesn't trust me in the potions classroom alone and Penny would ask too many questions."

Cyra answered, earning a groan from Merula, who in spite of wanting to argue knew how nosey Penny Haywood could be at times and since the obliviate thing, noticed Cyra was somewhat secretive with the blonde.

  
  


"Fine, see those bottles by my stack of books? Those are Wideeye potion I make for myself...take one and go away." 

  
  


With that Merula pulled her still disarranged covers over her head, mumbling to herself about annoying roommates.

"Thanks, Merula. I owe you."

  
  
  
  
  



	43. Fears and confrontation

"We all set?" 

Cyra asked as she made her way toward the edge of the forest where Chiara and Talbot stood. 

It was nearly dusk and the moon would soon be rising she knew and judging by Chiara's antsy behavior, she could feel it.

"Yeah. You still up for it?" 

Chiara asked, earning a sigh.

"Yeah, at least it's not snowing. I don't exactly like flying in the snow." 

Cyra retorted, earning a sigh.

"Yeah, I still feel bad about that rainstorm you two got caught in last month," Chiara responded earning a shrug from Talbot.

"It's just rain and it's not like we haven't flown in it before." 

He stated, smirking a bit as he added

"Though that is usually on a broom and where some of us...balance challenged...people don't usually misdirect and fly into a tree." 

Cyra quipped as she leaned back against a boulder, crossing her arms over her chest to ward off the cold wind.

"Hey, I warned you!" Talbot laughed, earning a look.

"About a meter too late." 

Their banter continued as the sky slowly darkened.

"I'm going to go ahead and get ready to change. I really don't want to ruin another good sweater." 

Chiara stated after a while, earning a nod from Cyra who glanced up at the sky.

"Going to be a pretty night. Maybe we can get to the heart of the forest again." 

She suggested as Chiara made her way beyond the forest, leaving the two animagi standing alone.

"I'd rather wake up there than in the mud near that Griffin again. She was kind enough to let us stay there till Chiara woke up." Talbot retorted, earning a groan.

"I smelled like the space beneath Liz's bed for a week! How the frilly hell did we end up in a Griffin den is beyond me." 

"We're birds, remember?" 

Cyra was about to respond when a sudden snap of a twig caught her attention.

"Someone's there." She said, drawing her wand and thanking the stars that Chiara had taken her potion.

Talbot let out a curse and muttered a spell, revealing none other than Cyra's roommate.

"Bloody fucking hell Merula." 

She growled, sighing as she stepped between the bemused girl and Talbot.

"She won't tell  _ but  _ I want to know why the hell I was followed." She said, mostly to Talbot though Merula's expression darkened.

"Because you are up to something! I already said that I could care less if you two idiots were," merula began, though she stopped when a sudden scream filled the air.

"What was that?" 

Cyra smirked at how pale her rival had gotten and shared a look with Talbot.

"Oh, you'll see." 

Merula stood frozen in place as the screams turned more animalistic until a loud, panting whine was coming from nearby.

"What is that? Why are you two so calm?" 

She demanded though she soon deflated entirely as a white, bipedal wolf-like beast emerged from the timberline.

Merula nearly stumbled backward had Cyra not caught her.

"Don't worry. Wolfsbane makes a werewolf civil but we've gotta go before anyone else sees and starts a panic." Cyra retorted, removing her jacket and tossing it at her dazed rival before transforming into a sleek raven, which swooped upward and did a flip, joined only by a golden eagle that called loudly. 

* * *

_ Werewolves….So that is why she was researching bloody werewolves. Of course, and the animagus thing. werewolves don't hunt animals, only humans but this means a student here is a werewolf.  _

Merula suppressed a shudder at that thought. She had heard about werewolves, especially Fenrir Greyback, and had to wonder if perhaps she was going to school with someone like  **_that._ **

  
  


_ Thank the stars Mum and Dad taught me that spell. _

She thought as she settled into bed, drawing the covers up around her despite the curtains on her bed being closed.

She cursed the fact that she couldn't stop shaking. That she could still see the silvery form encased in shadow and moonlight just staring at her with its ears pinned.

_ Would it have attacked if she was alone? _

She shuddered at the thought.

  
  


She wasn't even aware of how long she had been awake until she heard the door to the dorm scrape open, the sound causing her to very nearly jump out of her skin.

"Relax, Snyde. It's me and I want to sleep." Cyra said, moving toward the beds before adding "do me a favor and hex me with a cold curse again. I'd rather spend the day with Pomfrey than losing house points for kiping off in class." 

  
  


Merula was about to say no but thought better of it since this was the closest she could get to hurting Cyra without retaliation.

"Fine but you have to tell me about what I saw last night."

She saw Cyra's brow furrow but then she sighed and nodded.

"As long as you promise not to breathe a word of it." 

  
  
  



	44. Of Wolves and Avians

"Which one of your weird arse friends is the bloody werewolf?"

Cyra glanced up at Merula, who kept pacing about the room of requirement ranting and threatening to hex her for letting her come face to face with the creature.

"You'll see as soon as she gets done with breakfast," Cyra responded, trying not to snicker as Merula ranted to herself, trying to make sense of all of it.

When the door opened next, Merula very much nearly tripped over a stray piece of broken furniture. 

"What the hell is she doing here?" 

She shouted, accusation in her tone though Cyra just scoffed and glanced toward Chiara who stood there bemused.

  
  


"Never thought I would see the day when someone broke Merula." Chiara smirked, the dark rings under her eyes attesting to the strain of the previous night as she moved to sit on the pile of blankets beside Cyra.

"Are you two having a laugh? I know I'm not going mad! There was a fucking werewolf right there and I want to know who it is."

Merula exclaimed, stamping her foot in a way that reminded Cyra of a toddler.

Chiara rolled her eyes at that before retorting cooly

"Well, you're looking at her." 

  
  
  
  


Cyra bit her tongue to keep from laughing as she watched the gears in Merula's head come to a screeching halt. 

" _ You? _ You're the most non-intimidating person at Hogwarts minus Copper." 

Merula stated after several minutes though Chiara just sighed and closed her eyes.

  
  


"I got attacked outside my home one evening when I was just a little girl. My parents managed to save me but too late to prevent the curse." 

She responded before adding:

"I can prove it. Last night you were spying on us near the forbidden forest. Cyra shouted bloody fucking hell because you were there and you wanted to know how Talbot and Cyra were so calm." 

  
  


The look on Merula's face was worth the whole situation, at least for Cyra.

"Not every werewolf is like Greyback and his pack, especially since wolfsbane potion is now a thing." Cyra pointed out, earning a look from Merula whose brow was scrunched in thought.

"So the animagus thing, that fight with pigtails and the research I found in your room. It was because Chiara was a werewolf?" 

She guessed, causing Cyra to roll her eyes.

"Of course **_you're_** the one snooping through my things," she muttered before sighing continuing "but yes, it was. Penny would have announced it to the whole school if I hadn't oblivated her and you know the stigma against werewolves." 

Cyra really hoped this wouldn't blow up in her face as Merula grew quiet.

"Fine, I won't tell anyone." She finally said, "now if you losers don't mind, I have better things to do than sit in a magical broom closet all day." 


	45. Fears and Shadows

Things returned to normal after that, with Merula living up to her last name by being an annoying inconvenience and the information about Chiara never leaking although Merula did make jabs at Cyra about having fleas more times than not.

Though there was seemingly less hostility between them, or at least there was outside of certain classes and dueling club. No, if anything Merula would challenge her more often and seemed to become increasingly aggressive during their spars, though the injuries Cyra seemed to constantly sustain seemed less intentional.

At least compared to everything that would have happened the previous two years anyway.

Though the real trouble was yet to come and it was a problem that made the vaults of Ice and Fear look mundane in comparison.

  
  


* * *

"You know, I still don't get why you put up with Merula. She has landed you in the hospital wing twice this week!" 

Cyra just rolled her eyes at Rowan as she slid her shirt back over the undershirt she had stolen from Barnaby.

"We have a duel against Gryffindor next week. A few cuts and burns are  _ nothing _ . Besides, I'm seconding Merula and you know how she gets." 

She retorted, earning a huff.

"What is with you and dueling? Ever since you and Merula started doing...whatever this is… it's either dueling this and that!" 

Rowan retorted, earning a sigh.

"I can't help she challenges me nearly every  _ week  _ now but you have to admit, I  **_have_ ** gotten more confident in my spellwork." Cyra retorted, earning a look.

"You two are going to kill each other! I mean she hit you full in the chest with a tempest curse last week!" 

Cyra sighed and rolled her eyes as she ushered Rowan toward the door.

"It wasn't a strong enough spell to do  _ real _ damage." Cyra retorted, recalling how Merula had destroyed a training manikin earlier that year.

"It landed you in the hospital wing for burn salve!" 

"Only because we had run out and it was too severe for Episkey!" 

Cyra understood Rowan's worry about this. Merula wasn't always the most honest or the nicest  _ but each _ of these duels seemed to be driven by something far stronger than petty revenge and jealousy and Cyra honestly didn't mind the extra practice.

"So she beats you bloody, heals you, and does it again? She's using you as a bloody punching bag!" 

Rowan retorted, causing Cyra to sigh.

"So what? Right now she is covered in bruises because of me? I fail to see the difference." 

Cyra didn't mean to be short with her long-time friend but this was getting ridiculous. So what she if was spending time with the Slytherins? It was her house and Merula wasn't  **_always_ ** a pain in the arse.

"Never mind." 

Cyra mentally groaned but didn't respond for several minutes.

"Look, Jacob and I were always play dueling and I've always been competitive. I mean, you've seen me at gobstones!" 

Cyra said after a while, only to earn a sigh as the Ravenclaw deflated.

"It's just, you seem so different now that you're hanging around Merula. I just…" 

Cyra turned to face Rowan then, brow furrowing. 

"What? You know you can tell me anything." 

She could have sworn that Rowan's chin trembled slightly. 

"I'm just afraid you'll suddenly think I'm too boring to be friends with."

Cyra mentally cursed in her mind as she turned her attention toward her first friend.

"That won't happen, Rowan. You're my best friend. Just because I'm finally settling in as a Slytherin doesn't mean I'll forget my other friends. After all of this, let's go to Hogsmeade. Just us."

* * *

"You look like you just got stuck listening to Moaning Myrtle rant." 

Merula commented when Cyra returned to the dungeons from study group, earning a look.

"No, I got stuck listening to my best friend be  _ jealous _ and Skye being weirder than usual. I mean she was  _ actually  _ studying for once." 

Merula rolled her eyes at that and retorted 

"Speaking of weird, you got another letter…A howler I think but it was delivered with a bundle of some kind of flower?" 

Cyra arched a brow at that and groaned.

"This is getting ridiculous. If someone  **_likes_ ** me they should at least  _ tell  _ me they do besides all this." She muttered, earning a snicker.

"I know, I've read the notes." 

Cyra mentally swore at that but then rolled her eyes.

"Of course you did. Now let's see what this howler is." 

  
  


Cyra wanted to melt through the dungeon floor when she heard the distorted voice echo a poem that  _ had  _ to have muggle origins.

"Bloody hell." She grumbled as Merula pretended to gag. 

"They just seem to be trying to buy you off now," Merula commented once the letter exploded into flame.

"I wish they would just  _ tell  _ me who the hell they are. Poetry and such is cute but the parcel of candies that would take me a month to eat? The perfume?" 

Merula cut her off, pointing to the remains of the howler

"The fucking singing envelope?" 

She guessed, earning a groan.

"This is too much...Even for me. Like if someone wanted to impress me do it through sentimental things,  **_not_ ** fancy crap."

  
  


* * *

Merula awoke to the sound of someone cursing under their breath, a dim light coming from the cracks in the curtains around Cyra's bed.

"Forget your potions homework?" 

She jeered, earning a hissed curse before Cyra emerged from the privacy of the curtain.

"No, I am working on something personal but  _ you wouldn't  _ understand." 

Merula rolled her eyes and withdrew her wand, pointing it at Cyra's bed.

"Accio parchment." 

The scrawl was sloppy—nothing like the careful small print that Cyra usually wrote in—and there were some names crossed out, most with the same last name.

Felten.

"You are going to drive yourself mad with this." She commented before sighing. 

It wasn't often something got the other girl  _ this  _ worked up and besides that, with everything that was happening, Merula was pretty sure that she would be doing the same thing.

  
  


"look, if I help you with this, you'll owe me but I may convince someone in Hogsmeade to let me floo home to get the records my parents had. The fools at the ministry didn't find  _ everything  _ my mum and dad had." 

She watched in the dim light as Cyra blanched at those words.

"Isn't that breaking some kind of rule? Even if we do it over the winter holiday?" 

Cyra asked, earning a smirk.

"Only if we get caught and I think if I word myself right, I can convince someone to let me pop home for a bit. Unless you want to spend break at the manor?" 

Merula really hoped that she wouldn't, just because she didn't want to return to that house until she absolutely  **_had_ ** to.

"No offense but I'm close enough to the dark arts as I want to be." 

Cyra retorted, earning a snort.

"My  _ house  _ isn't  **_that_ ** bad, Birdbrain. I mean, yes there is battle damage in the sitting room  **_but_ ** it's a house. Not a Horcrux or something." 

  
  


"A what?"

Merula rolled her eyes at the question.

_ Of course, she doesn't know.  _

"It's a dark magic thing. I'll let you borrow the book over summer if you want. Now do us all a favor and go to sleep." 


	46. Feelings

Cyra smirked as she leaned forward on the broom, the rush of the air around her roaring in her ears as she pulled up, barely dodging the bludger that Gryffindor had sent her way.

"Moores!" 

The sound of her name just gave her enough heads up to catch the quaffle, bolting off with the Gryffindor chasers flanking her.

She barely caught the signal from the one on her left, a slight movement that had the crimson-clad players sandwich her, though she had seen the move enough times in play to just smirk.

_ Alright, Parkin. Let's see if you can handle this. _

She thought, diving downward at the last minute, sending the beater hurling toward the pair.

"And Parkin has taken a nasty fall, taking Gryffindor down a player. What a counter from Slytherin!" 

Cyra barely caught Murphy's commentary as she rushed toward the goalposts, making a mental note to check up on Skye later.

The match went on for over two hours, only ending when Merula—in a rather clumsy display of broom surfing— managed to catch the snitch while nearly falling from her broom.

It really was the only time Cyra had seen anyone actually cheer  _ for  _ the other Slytherin. Even their own house.

Outside of Ismelda, Barnaby, and a few students who just hope she won't be a jerk to them. Anyway.

_ Maybe that was half the reason she tried so hard to become a seeker. _

Cyra wondered as she followed the team back toward the changing rooms.

It was odd especially since not even a full year ago Cyra would have laughed in anyone's face if they said she could get on with Merula.

At least getting on as well as one  _ could  _ with the arrogant Slytherin, anyway. 

"I owe you a butterbeer." She called to the violet-eyed girl upon entering the changing tent, earning a scoff.

"Throw in lunch and I'll think about it!" 

Merula quipped, the win evidently softening her edge just slightly.

It was definitely weird, this thing between them, but at least Merula wasn't being a complete bitch now.

* * *

"So we all were thinking about doing a gift exchange the day before we all leave for the holiday," Rowan said that night at dinner, loading their plate.

"Sounds good. I still need to get a few more things for people. You, Tonks, Tulip, Charlie, and Bill are easy. Penny, Chiara, and Talbot are not." Cyra retorted, mentally adding a few Slytherins to that list.

"I am not!" Penny argued, snickering "you may also want to add Skye to that list because I know she got you something." 

Cyra mentally cursed herself for that before sighing. 

"Any idea what she would like because I would rather not break my aunt and uncle's bank account."

"Oh! Maybe I can help with that!" 

* * *

Cyra nearly punched the tawny, large owl that woke her the following morning with a scribbled message in its beak.

"I swear if this is Orion's idea for a zen session." She muttered after the offended owl left the dorm, making Cyra wonder who had let it in to start with.

She threw on the same pants and shirt she had worn the day before, grabbing a cloak from the trunk at her bed before heading toward the quidditch patch.

Only to find it nearly deserted, save for a pacing Skye Parkin who was muttering to herself.

"Skye? What the hell? It's bloody cold out here, what's wrong?"

She asked, noticing the way the blue-haired girl blushed.

"Uh, Cyra...I...Wanted to talk to you. I know it's early but…" 

Skye began although Cyra just waved her off.

"It's fine. What is it you wanted me out here for? You seem nervous." 

Skye glanced down at that, rubbing at the back of her neck as she shifted slightly.

"You've been getting notes, right?"

  
  


Cyra felt herself go rigid though she only arched a brow.

"Yes, why?" 

She replied, noticing the Gryffindor chaser's face flushing at the question.

"I've been trying to get the nerve to tell you. I was the one who sent them, I...I know we don't always get on but I like you." 

Out of everyone, Skye Parkin was the last person Cyra would expect. Well right under Ismelda and Merula anyway.

"Skye…" she began, though the other girl kept babbling on, sounding almost insecure at this point.

"Skye! Take a breath! I thought it was sweet, a bit overkill but sweet. Anyone would be honored actually." 

Cyra finally intervened, trying not to revert into a blushing idiot as the realization that someone  _ liked her  _ **_like_ ** _ that  _ hit her like a bludger.

"So will you….Can we try it?" 

Skye questioned earning a laugh.

"Yeah, let's just  _ not  _ tell Penny right away. She would probably spazz out." 

  
  
  
  


* * *

Merula groaned when Cyra came into the great hall with Skye, both separating to their usual friend groups though something was off about them. Something that Merula really couldn't place. 

"You are annoyingly cheerful this morning." She said, nursing a cup of coffee that—though she wouldn't admit it—was more cream than coffee.

"Well, I've had a decent morning."

Cyra retorted as she began to fill a bowl with porridge and fruit.

"Do you have to be a Merlin blast ball of energy? I don't care if you met the Prime Minister of England, it's too damned early." 

If her crass language affected Cyra, she didn't show it, though as breakfast drew on Merula became increasingly curious about why her annoying housemate was so bubbly at this hour.

"What has gotten you so worked up anyway? Usually, someone has to kick you out of bed." She said after a while.

"I found out who my secret admirer is." 

For some reason, those words made a rush of irritation wash over Merula, though she wasn't sure why.

"Oh, so you found who was being so fucking annoying? Well maybe you will stop getting owls at the stupidest hours."


	47. Christmas Holidays pt 1

She tried to ignore the weight in her chest as she sat in the great hall, listening to the small party—if it could be called that—across the room. 

It was even worse when she saw how happy Cyra was surrounded by all of them. Shouldn't Cyra be miserable as well? Her father in Azkaban, her mother in America?

Why was it that good things always seemed to happen for the one who never worked for it? Why was it that no matter what, she was always shoved to the side?

Merula felt the weight rise into her throat at that and her eyes burned. Her so-called friends had left already, the only thing she had received from them was a pack of chocolate frogs that had been half off at honeydukes.

She knew she  _ should  _ be grateful she received anything at all but the fact that Cyra still had so much—even with the news of her  _ true  _ heritage being out—hurt.

Not that she would ever say that out loud.

Then there was the fact that she and Cyra had been getting along and yet—unlike a few times in the past—she didn't even  _ think  _ to invite her to the group.

Not that she  _ wanted _ to hang out with any of Cyra's hair-brained friends.

She tried to focus on the book of advanced potions in front of her, but the scrawled handwriting in the margins became blurred the more her mind raced, resulting in her having little choice but to bury her head in her arms and pray that the emotions wouldn't boil over.

After all, that would only prove that everyone was right and that she was weak. She couldn't afford that, not when weakness meant she would end up getting hurt.

  
  


Oh, how her aunt would have had a field day with this if she could see her now.

_ Who would  _ **_want_ ** _ to be around you, with what your parents did! You are just like them, you know. You even look like  _ **_her._ **

Merula could practically hear her. 

Why was it that  **_she_ ** was always compared to her parents when she was far from the only descendant of death eaters at Hogwarts? 

She thought about the promise she had made to her rival and thought about breaking it, though if there was one thing a pureblood  _ was—even those with considered tainted blood— _ and that was to keep any oath sworn.

Could  _ that  _ be considered an oath? 

Maybe Cyra had even forgotten about their talk about that?

* * *

"I bet the dungeons are freezing." 

Skye pointed out as Cyra pulled out the obviously handed-down flannel shirt that Bill had given her.

"Thankfully not overly bad but this shirt will  _ definitely  _ be appreciated," Cyra responded, looking over at Bill.

"Thanks. I can always use good winter clothes, especially since I'm moving into the mountains." 

She added, shrugging into the fur-lined button up to see how it fit her.

They continued exchanging gifts until each of them had a small pile in front of them, though Cyra's favorite was the group photo that they had all gathered together and taken.

However, far too soon it was time for everyone who was catching the last train home for the Christmas holiday and left the castle much quieter than it usually was.

  
  


* * *

Merula cursed to herself as she made her way through the reserves. Trying to ignore the dark, skeletal being that loomed in the shadows of the trees, their wings flicking out as she walked past.

They  _ knew  _ she could see them, she was sure of it. Ever since they had to ride the carriages the second year and she had faltered at the sight of them.

Self-driving carriages. Merlin's beard, how dumb were some of the students to never question that? Did they not realize that it would not be  _ that  _ linear? A bludger was all over the place as was a snitch. Did that not make people question things?

As she walked she saw what she was looking for, its fur brighter than the fresh-fallen snow and much brighter than the last time she had seen it.

"It's been a while, Asimi. Guess we are both older than we were back then, huh?" She spoke to the creature, holding out a hand and allowing the creature to come to her.

Though as soon as it did, she buried her face into its long mane. 

_ At least there is something familiar for me here...something that is like back then. _

* * *

"Can I trust you two not to kill each other?" Felix asked Cyra as he levitated a tree into place for decorating.

"Hey, I plan on doing some reading up on dueling spells and just enjoying the holiday. Merula can do whatever Merula wants." 

Cyra responded before adding 

"Felix, we  **_can_ ** be civil. I think if things get irritating we can put distance between us in a castle this big." Cyra retorted, hanging some streamers along the ceiling.

Felix wanted to believe that, he truly did however he also knew how tempers could flare.

"Just remembers Slytherin is a united front. This thing between you and Snyde has gone too far as it is. Being alone for two weeks may be good for you both if you keep your head."


	48. Christmas Holidays pt 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Christmas eve at Hogwarts and Merula and Cyra are sort of forced to hang out.

Merula groaned when she woke up to the sound of a yelp, followed by laughter and mumbled cursing. 

"What the bloody hell could they possibly be doing at six-thirty in the morning?" She grumbled to herself as she looked at the clock. 

Not even bothering to change out of her pajamas, she headed into the common room only to find a trio of first-years and Cyra putting decorations on a Christmas tree.

"You idiots could wake the dead...and why is this room covered in bubbles?" She asked, earning a smirk from Cyra who sent a blast of bubbles at her in response.

  
  


"Ugh, what are you? Ten? Cut it out before I cast incendo on that tree of yours!" 

Cyra just laughed in response.

"Oh stop being so sour, it's Christmas eve. I brought some food from the kitchens, help yourself then help us with this tree." 

Cyra retorted and Merula wanted to yell at her, to tell her that she had no idea what she felt. What she had gone through these last few years, yet she didn't.

Something about this—annoying roommate aside—felt different than the previous years. Lighter.

She couldn't explain  _ why  _ it was she felt that way, especially since she still felt the gut-wrenching disappointment and choking sadness that she felt every year but  _ something  _ was different.

Something that she didn't have a name for.

"I am not helping you losers put up a stupid tree." 

* * *

  
  


After breakfast, Merula found herself alone in the library, looking through the advanced spellbook she had found.

The notes she found along the margins definitely made getting good marks in potions a lot easier, plus the spells could be useful one day.

Even if she hadn't tried two of them yet.

  
  


She was jotting the notes down in her journal when she became aware of someone standing in front of her, causing her to glance up enough to see the swirl printed robes that shimmered in the beams of sunlight that briefly filtered through the windows.

"What do you want now, birdbrain?"

she asked, being sure to keep her tone low and not even looking up from her notes.

"I know you hate Christmas but Hagrid invited me to tea and I was wondering if you would like to come?" 

The question made her look up, arching a brow. Why was Cyra inviting her?

"And why would I want to spend  _ any time  _ with you and that oaf?" She retorted, though her rival just smirked.

"Because you spend just as much time with him and his creatures as I do." 

Merula cursed the fact that Hagrid couldn't keep a secret to save his life.

"Fine but only because I'm tired of writing." 

She tried to ignore the fact that as she got up, she could see how red-rimmed Cyra's eyes were. Had they been that way that morning? She found herself wondering, though.she told herself she didn't care.

After all, Cyra's mother had written to her and wished her a happy Christmas. Had cared enough to send her a few galleons as a present. 

Cyra's uncle and Aunt had also sent her packages as well. Cyra had  _ no  _ reason to feel sorry for herself.

Not when she didn't have it that bad.

Mentally shaking the thought from her head, Merula gathered her things and followed her.

  
  
  


It wasn't until they were outside that either of them spoke again.

"You still want to sneak back to your place and find that book?" 

Cyra nearly whispered, sounding so unsure that Merula almost felt sorry for her.

_ Almost _ .

"Why? You chickening out?" 

She watched as Cyra closed her eyes and swallowed hard. She looked nervous or maybe even afraid.

Not even in the vault of fear did Cyra look afraid.

"No, I want to go with you. Whatever we find...I want it to stay between us." 

Merula found herself freezing in place when she heard that. Between them? Why did she trust her so much?

"You really are mad." 

She muttered, earning a huff from the other girl.

"Yeah, maybe." 

  
  


It didn't take a genius to tell that Cyra had lost her usual spunk. Was this the same girl who had fought with her for two years? 

"Why do you always hang out around here anyway? Ever since first year you've basically imprinted on Hagrid." 

She asked to change the subject, cursing the fact that she was really bad at small talk.

"I like learning about creatures and since first year I've been helping around the reserve. Usually just the Nifflers and smaller creatures, except the Thestrals anyway. Kinda hard to feel threatened by them." 

That admittance caused Merula to take a step back.

"Wait, you can see them? Don't you realize how dangerous they are?" 

She watched Cyra sigh.

"They aren't, not really." 

It was obvious that Cyra knew what she was asking, though she was choosing to ignore it.

"Really? They have an XXXX rating from the ministry, they are bad luck and they eat meat. Not to mention they are hideous!"

Cyra glanced over at her then, eyes narrowed slightly.

"You can see them too." 

It was a statement, not a question. However, before Merula could continue Cyra continued.

"They're only dangerous if they see you as a threat and the only bad luck they bring is the luck you need to see death." 

The way Cyra continued to walk told Merula more than she thought she wanted to know.

"Maybe but I do not want anything to do with flesh-eating skeleton horses." 

She muttered before moving to catch up.

  
  


* * *

Cyra sighed as she poked at the Treacle that Hagrid had given them to bring back, the mixture of scents assaulting her senses even though it was at a distance.  
  


"Take my advice and don't try any. It tastes worse than it smells." Merula advised from where she sat at the other end of the common room, laying back against a bookshelf and watching the water creatures swim by the window.

"Then why did you agree to take it?" Cyra asked, earning a shrug.

"The squid likes it." 

Cyra wasn't sure that this was the only reason but she didn't press the subject.

"I know it's just Christmas eve but I got you something." She said as she moved over to the stack of gifts under the tree.

"What?" 

Cyra just sighed.

"I hope you like it. You aren't the easiest to shop for." 

She retorted before tossing Merula two packages.

"This better not be a prank."

"Just open them already."

She watched as Merula slowly opened the first, smaller package revealing a songbook.

"You got me a songbook?" 

Cyra only nodded and poked at the fire.

"Yeah, I figured it was the safest bet. Now open the other one."

She half expected Merula to insult her once she saw the scarf set but instead, the other girl seemed to be trying to avoid looking at her.

"I don't know why you felt the need to do this but thanks." 

Something in her voice set alarms off in Cyra's head though she pushed that thought aside.

"You didn't seem to have anything but the school scarf and you were complaining about the snow so...I figured you could use it. Besides, it's Christmas." 


	49. Christmas Holiday Pt 3

It came as no surprise to Merula when she couldn't sleep that night, her mind racing with the events of that day.

Glancing over at Cyra—who had fallen asleep with her curtain open—Merula sighed and climbed out of bed.

If she couldn't sleep then she may as well go clear her mind elsewhere.

Casting the disillusionment charm onto herself, she left the dorm and then the common room, making her way to the black lake.

  
  


Christmas. 

Why was Christmas even a thing? It was stupid. A waste of money and a waste of time. Or at least that is what Merula told herself.

Especially on nights like this where she couldn't sleep. When she couldn't get her mind to focus on anything but that night shortly after her tenth birthday when everything went to hell.

Three years without family.

Three years of being alone.

What had she done to deserve this? What had she done to have her life ruined? Had her parents even thought about how this would affect her?

Had they even cared?

One part of her wanted to believe they had loved her, that wasn't just grooming her to be a valuable asset to the dark lord. 

Yet sometimes it was hard to know what she believed anymore. Hard to know how much of what her aunt said was true. 

Did she deserve what the neighbors did to her? Said to her? 

Did she deserve to be locked up with her parents? Was she destined to be a death eater?

Was she a monster? If she was left alone with anything living would she kill it? 

Would she find killing to be enjoyable?

  
  


_ That  _ particular thought reminded her all too well of the night her life turned into a nightmare. Reminded her of the blast of green light hitting its target, sending the man's body hurling through the air and into the wall behind him.

The scene still haunted her sleep. After all, who would have imagined her mother being able to willingly cast such a curse?

Hadn't she told her that spell was for defense only? To perhaps save a life?

Burying her head in her arms she tried to fight the images, after all, she had enough of a reminder at home.

Could it even be called home?

She wasn't sure how long she had sat out there before she realized that she wasn't alone.

"The hell do you want?"

She grumbled, glancing up.

"Nothing. You weren't in the dorm or common room and with all the shit that has been happening I was worried." 

Merula really wanted to ask her why she would be worried about her but didn't have the mental strength for an arguement.

"I needed to be alone." 

To her surprise, when Cyra spoke it was a question.

"Do you want me to leave?" 

Merula didn't know what answer she wanted to give to that.

"You can stay but if you mention this to anyone I'll turn you into a sea urchin." 

She retorted, earning a chuckle.

"Don't worry, what happens between us stays between us." 

  
  


* * *

  
  


Cyra wasn't sure what to do. If this was Rowan, Tonks or even Tulip she would be able to comfort them but Merula.

Merula was so hard to read.

"My mum loved Christmas." 

The statement caused Cyra to jolt from her thoughts. Was Merula really opening up?

"Yeah?" She prompted, earning a wet chuckle.

"Yeah. One year when I was really small she had my dad help with the decorating and he caught a streamer on fire….My mother swore she didn't mean to hit him with the water charm." 

Cyra could hear Merula's voice breaking though she had chuckled.

"Sounds like your family used to be close." 

Cyra commented, earning a look.

"Is it that hard to believe?" 

Cyra could hear the accusation, though in honestly she hadn't even thought about it.

"No, I guess not." 

Another wave of silence settled over them before Merula sighed and pulled out her wand.

"My mum...we had a tradition. On christmas eve night we would cast this spell...that's one reason I came out here."

She admitted, glancing up before sighing

"Since you got me a gift I guess I can teach you if you want." 

  
  



	50. Perks of Holidays Alone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Christmas day and Cyra and Merula go about their business. Both dealing with their own painful realities in different ways but both clinging to the past.

"This is so cool."

Merula closed her eyes, recalling how she had said something similar so long ago.

"Yeah well, it's a simple spell. Even you're not dumb enough mess it up." She retorted, sighing as she glanced up at the new snowfall before adding "My mum taught me that spell when I was just a little girl. It was the only spells she taught me that couldn't be used to hurt someone." 

She didn't know why she was telling Cyra this but she couldn't bring herself to regret the decision. 

"Did she sing to you or was that a ploy like everyone said?" 

Cyra asked after a while, though Merula couldn't hear any accusation in her tone. 

"Kinda both...Not that I  _ thought  _ you would come after me. You know  **_nothing_ ** about me, Moores. No one does." 

She waited to hear what nonsense Cyra would retort to that, though to her surprise the other girl just retorted.

"I know."

* * *

Cyra couldn't sleep that night, even after returning to the dorm. Her mind was racing with not only her own issues but those that her rival and roommate. 

Why had she assumed Merula had a different life than anyone else just because of who her parents were? Especially now that she knew her father was in ties with the death eaters.

She definitely owed Merula an apology for a lot of stuff she had said over the last two years. 

Maybe Merula wasn't as evil as she had originally thought. Maybe Felix was right and they could at least learn to tolerate each other.

Maybe that was why he suggested they form a team during the dueling tournament. Maybe he knew more than either of them had giving him credit for.

* * *

Christmas day was quiet, to say the least with the few younger students engaging in a cross house snowball fight in the courtyard and Merula disappearing on a walk. 

This gave Cyra far too much time to think, though she tried to distract herself with a book of spells, though her mind refused to focus on the text in the book.

Not when she had spent the last two Christmases in a magical household that had utilized magic in a way that living in her mother's house had not.

Were all pureblood families like that? Allowing minor underage magic? It embarrassed her to say she didn't even know how wizard families even worked.

The politics of the wizardry world was so strange. It wasn't about what people did in their private lives—as the muggles had started arguments about same-sex couples at court in later years—nor was it about gender equality.

No, Wizard politics seemed to circle around who you are, who you know, how strong you are, how wealthy you are, and what blood ran through your veins.

Nothing more, nothing less. 

It confused her. Why had her mother not told her about any of this? Why had she not been prepared more for the wizarding world?

She had been kept in the dark with so much and for what reason? Because her father's family had ties to the dark lord? 

What about that equaled to  **_her_ ** being interested in the dark arts? Didn't her mother know her better than that?

* * *

Merula sighed as she tried to ignore the large, dark creatures that were sheltering beneath the trees as the snow fell. 

She did  _ not  _ need a reminder of the past at the moment. Not when she was having an okay day. 

Then she saw something shimmering gold out of the corner of her eye, drawing her closer.

"Merlin's beard! You foaled! I didn't even notice you were pregnant!" She said to the bright, pearly creature that walked over to her, nearly knocking her over with it's muzzle.

"Don't worry. I remembered your treats this time. No wonder you've been keeping near Hagrid's, you wanted to make sure your baby was healthy."

It was moments like these that Merula was glad that Hogwarts was nearly empty at this time of year. It made it easier to keep certain parts of herself secret. Especially parts that included shiny, magical horses. 


	51. A glimpse into the past

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cyra sees a hint of Merula's past.

The next day Cyra awoke before dawn with someone knocking her to the floor.

"If you want to see those records, get off your arse, and change into something presentable." 

Cyra found herself glaring up at her dorm mate, blinking in the wand light.

"Bloody Hell. What did you do? Depulso me?" 

She groaned, sitting up and rolling the shoulder she had landed on. 

"Yes. Now come on before I change my mind." 

* * *

Merula wasn't sure why she had agreed to this or why she had exchanged a half day's work for secrecy, a fireplace, and floo powder but she had and  _ now  _ she had to explain to a thirteen-year-old witch how the floo system worked.

Not that it was completely Cyra's fault since her mother had sheltered her from far too much.

"Just say  _ very _ clearly '32 Snyde Estate'." 

She instructed, earning a nod.

She tried not to laugh at how nervous Cyra looked as she stepped into the green flames. 

_ It won't burn you, dim wit. If I wanted to hurt you I wouldn't have drug you all the way into the village to do it! _

Merula thought following suit as soon as Cyra disappeared, appearing in the all too familiar sitting room.

  
  


_ I was hoping I wouldn't have to see this place until summer. _

She thought, only to nearly burst out laughing when she saw that Cyra was leaning against a nearby grandfather clock, looking pale.

  
  


"What's wrong, birdbrain? Motion sick?" 

"Suck an egg, Snyde." 

The response was so strange that Merula nearly tripped over herself as she left the fireplace.

"Careful someone might think you are actually a part bird." 

She commented, earning a look.

"Says the girl who talks about unicorns in her sleep!" 

Merula felt her face heat up at that accusation.

"I do not! I don't even like Unicorns!" 

Cyra just snickered, motioning toward the mantle.

"Isn't that a picture of you on the back of one?" 

_ Merlin Blast! Why did I bring her here again? _

"Shut up and let's go. The book of names is upstairs."

Cyra just snickered and followed her, only pausing near the stairway and Merula knew why.

The crack in the wall.

Merula wasn't sure what she could say to cover up the origin of such damage. 

"You know you look like your mum. That was your mum in the picture with you, right?" 

Cyra asked instead, though Merula had to wonder which question hurt the most to answer. Then again, even if the happy memories hurt, the darker ones were torture in comparison.

"Yeah. It is. The unicorn was hers...I think I was seven in that picture." She answered, unable to bring herself to say any different.

"You surprised? Everyone else seems to think they brainwashed me or something. I mean...They taught me to fight but…"

Merula paused and closed her eyes, leaning heavily on the handrail as she tried not to think about all the other things.

The things said during those training sessions with her father. The way her mother was nearly complacent.

They loved her, she didn't doubt that but another part of her couldn't help but wonder how much

  
  


How much had been love? How much had they taught her for protection? How much because they wanted her to be a useful vessel for the dark lord?

"No. I'm just surprised you let me see this." 

Those words cut her from her thoughts and she looked up.

"What?" 

Cyra just smirked.

"You could have just brought me the book but you trusted me with seeing all of this. Not that anyone would believe Merula Snyde would like Unicorns." 

Now  _ that  _ jarred her from her thoughts.

"This does  **_not_ ** mean we're friends. It just means I don't think you're a pompous arse like I used to." 

* * *

Cyra was amazed by the size of the house, though she couldn't help but wonder why it seemed as though no one lived in it.

At least until they got to the library.

The Library looked as though someone had camped in there, blankets and pillows scattered across the single sofa and floor.

But what really caught her attention was the moving pictures and paintings in the room.

Particularly a photo of a younger Merula holding a wand that obviously was not her own and in robes far too big for her.

She was practically beaming as the wand lit up with a shower of red sparks as the photo moved.

"My dad kept more  _ private _ family photos here. Things he knew I wouldn't want my friends to see as I got older." 

Merula commented as she rummaged around beneath a bookshelf, yelping and pulling back as a white, fluffy creature scurried across the floor and under an adjacent cabinet.

"Bloody hell that thing scared me! How did it even get in here?" 

Cyra, who had not been prepared for such a normal reaction from the over the top girl started to laugh.

"And what is so funny?" 

"Nothing, just I expected your first reaction to something startling you would be to try to kill it." 

Cyra commented, watching as Merula stiffened.

"Stop assuming shit about me. Just because my parents…" 

She trailed off and Cyra knew she had unknowingly struck a nerve.

"I actually was talking about how you act at school. Ready to blast someone into the middle of next week for  _ looking  _ at you the wrong way." 

_ Did her parents do something unforgivable? Were they part of the groups that tortured and killed? _

She wondered though she didn't dare ask.

"Here's the stupid book. Let's go." 

  
  


* * *

  
  


Merula left Cyra in Hogsmeade and headed into the reserve, her mind filling with images of green flashes and a still body crumpling to the ground.

_ Did Cyra really not know about that? Had she just meant it as a joke? _

She wondered, feeling her pulse rise slightly at the inkling of hope that bloomed in her chest.

Why should she care?

She hated Cyra Moores and she had plenty of reasons to.

_ "You're dead set on being like your parents, aren't you?"  _

_ "Shut up, death eater."  _

_ "Maybe you should be in Azkaban with them." _

The comments repeated in her mind, so much in fact that Merula wanted to punch something.

_ I am  _ **_not_ ** _ my parents. _

She repeated like a mantra.

_ I am  _ **_not_ ** _ like them! I am not an m… _

She didn't dare finish that sentence as her stomach retched violently. 

Even after two and a half years, the thought of that night made her sick, for several reasons.

_ Damn it….It was ages ago. Why can't I just move on? Why can't I just hate them for doing this to me? For leaving me alone? For that night? For the nightmares? _

Merula questioned herself as emotions consumed her. She knew why she couldn't.

She loved them.

_ Love is a weakness.  _

She repeated for the millionth time in the last three years. 

Love, she knew, in any of its forms was a weakness that just ended with your heart broken in unrepairable fragments.

She was ruined.

Her life was ruined.

And she would have to fight like hell to change that.

  
  
  
  



	52. Confrontations

Animals calmed her down.

That was something most people didn't seem to realize when they accused her of doing inhumane tests on the creatures they saw her with.

Something that Merula was glad for as she sat, wrapped in a cloak and allowing the nifflers to scurry around her in search of shiny things.

It gave her time to think. 

Time to clear her mind of all the things that had come back to torture her.

"Merula?" 

The sudden voice caused her to nearly jump out of her skin, though she quickly blushed at the state she had been caught in.

"Shit! What do you want, Birdbrain?" 

Cyra just chuckled.

"I wanted to apologize for what I said back there. I didn't mean to offend you." 

Merula could only think of all of the times before when Cyra  **_had_ ** meant offense. When Cyra  **_had_ ** sneered at her with such venom that it had very nearly driven her to tears.

Then again, the excuse back then was that she had asked for it. That wasn't all true though, it couldn't be.

Not a few times at least.

"Bullocks." She snapped "you  _ did  _ mean it exactly how you said it. You meant to imply that I was a killer. That I was like….them."

  
  


Merula felt numb as soon as the words left her lips.

"No, I…"

She didn't give Cyra time to respond. 

"Don't give me that. You have always said that ever since you found out about my parents being death eaters!"

A silence fell over them then, however, after several moments Cyra finally spoke.

"I know and it wasn't fair of me. I should have never brought them up but you would compare me to Jacob...would mock me by saying he was dead. I guess I wanted you to know how I felt." 

Merula wanted to do a multitude of things when she heard those words. To both verbally and physically curse her, to make her regret that choice.

Yet she couldn't bring herself to.

Not when she would have probably done the same. 

"If you haven't noticed, I  _ do _ know how it feels. If you weren't little miss perfect, you would realize that not everyone can bounce back from losing someone. Not everyone can just be a fucking ray of sunshine." 

Merula said again, earning a look.

"Do you think I had it easy, Merula? With you constantly breathing down my neck, with the vaults and wanting to find my brother and my Mom nearly popping a vein over my sorting into Slytherin. Does that sound like I had it fucking easy?" 

There was no anger in the statement, just blunt honesty. 

Something Merula had never noticed before.

"I am sorry I gave you such a hard time but you didn't make it easy to be anything but."

Merula sighed and closed her eyes. 

"I wanted you to see what it was like. To see that not everyone loved you. You made friends so easily, even with that mess your brother made of things. Yet it never impacted you."

She heard Cyra scoff at that and could imagine her rolling her eyes.

"Merula, I don't even think my mum loves me. I  **_know_ ** not everyone will even like me. I certainly didn't need you to teach me that." 

A heavy silence fell over them then as Cyra took a seat on the log, holding a hand out for one of the creatures to scurry onto her.

"I won't ask forgiveness but I am sorry. I guess I never thought about what you were going through." 

Merula wasn't sure what to say to that. She had started seeing another side of Cyra during these last few months. A Cyra that was lost, confused but underhanded and cunning. 

There was even a hint of something rebellious inside the girl she had seen as a rival for so long.

"Yeah, we both misjudged each other." 

She responded, unsure what else to say.

Just as a familiar whinny came from behind them, causing Cyra to quite literally fall off the log with an oath that would have made a sailor blush.

Merula couldn't stop herself from laughing.

"Looks like Asimi likes you." 

Cyra glared up at her, trying to ignore the foal that was sniffing at her curiously.

"I thought you said you didn't like 

Unicorns."

Cyra muttered, earn a look

"Shut up Moores. You literally have a death horse that follows you." 

  
  
  
  



	53. Meeting the Feltens

Cyra was nervous, to say the least as she watched the elderly woman and a pair of twenty-something-year-olds step out of the fireplace at the Hogshead inn.

"You look just like your father." 

The woman's voice broke and she wasn't sure how to feel about the comment. Should she be proud or ashamed?

"Thank you." She managed to respond, earning an eye roll from Merula who had come with her.

"It's a pleasure to finally meet you...My mother…" 

Cyra began earning a chuckle from the girl by the woman's side.

"Forbid him from seeing you except on the Christmas holidays? Freaked out because you got sorted into Slytherin?" 

Cyra was about to ask when the other girl smirked and responded

"Jacob told me. I am sorry about what happened." 

Cyra was about to question all of this when the older lady spoke up.

"Satana, enough. We came to finally meet Anguis's youngest daughter. Not interrogate the poor girl." 

* * *

Merula sat listening to the small family reunion, being reminded of the drama-filled magazines she had seen in a muggle supermarket.

However, what interested her was the quiet twenty-something that seemed folded in on themself.

It was obvious by how the woman spoke to them that they were a favorite of hers, though there was something up with them.

Something that Merula didn't trust.

Merula couldn't just place what and as she watched Cyra relax with these people, her family, Merula couldn't bring herself to bring it up.

Not with her finally accepting what had happened and that her family wasn't as twisted as she had feared.

After all, Anne did have the makings of a normal grandmother and Satana a pretty normal twenty-one-year-old and neither hid the darker parts of the family history from Cyra.

"So my brother wasn't a death eater."

The statement brought Merula from her thoughts and toward Cyra as Santana scoffed.

"Jake loved people far too deeply to have been. Mudblood, pure blood. It didn't matter to him. No, whoever killed him was a part of something else….Something less organized but just as dangerous."

A heavy silence fell over the room then as Anne's brow furrowed.

"Knights of Walpurgis I believe they were called that originated from the 1940s. Perhaps you could ask your headmaster….he could probably tell you more."

Merula felt her brow furrow at that as she gauged Cyra's reaction.

"They sign the letters as R." 

Merula spoke, earning an unreadable look from Cyra's other cousin.

_ Yes, something was definitely up with them. Something Satana and Anne were not aware of. _

_ She would warn Cyra later.  _

* * *

  
  


"You noticed it too?"

Cyra commented as she and Merula walked from Hogsmeade, earning a smirk.

"You're not as dumb as I thought." 

Merula commented, earning a look from Cyra.

"Even Barnaby would notice Adrik being off. I don't think my half-sister or grandmother knows much about it though."

Merula nodded in agreement.

"True. How are you feeling about being a Felten, now?"

Cyra sighed and glanced up at the flying snowflakes.

"I...I don't think my mum was right. I know she was just trying to protect me and Jacob but if he was old enough to meet them at twelve, I should have been too."


	54. Change

Cyra sighed as she waited outside of Hogsmeade for her friends to return. She had asked Merula to come but the other girl had refused to get out of bed, mumbling something rather derogatory about the cold weather.

So here she was, at noon standing in the pouring snow waiting on the Hogwarts express to unload.

"Cyra!"

The voice barely gave her time to register it before someone threw an arm wrapping around her shoulders, throwing her off balance.

"Skye! Merlin fucking blast! You scared me!" She yelped, half laughing as she caught her balance.

"Sorry!"

She could hear giggling and someone fake gagging behind them, to which Skye blushed before pressing a kiss to Cyra's cheek, causing her to go beet red.

That was definitely not the greeting she expected. 

She could hear someone wolf-whistle and didn't need to turn around to see that it was Tonks.

"Oh shut it!" She called over her shoulder, biting back a harsher retort when she heard her friend literally burst into laughter.

_ I am definitely going to buy some itching powder and dumping it over her head. _

Cyra thought before she sighed, putting an arm around Skye and turning toward their friends that were making their way toward them.

Maybe leaving her old life behind wouldn't be so bad. She thought, glancing over at Rowan—who had evidently decided to grow their hair out over break—and grinned.

Maybe Merula was right. 

Maybe a new start was exactly what she needed. Maybe change didn't have to be horrible.

Even if it was advice from a girl who never believed her own advice. 

"So how was your holiday?" 

Rowan's voice commented as they came over to them, eyes narrowed slightly before adding

"Did you cut your hair?" 

Cyra sighed and glanced up at the snowfall.

"There is a lot I have to tell everyone, but not out here freezing our arse off."


End file.
